URGENT! I REALLY like my very good guy friend, how can I get him to ask me out?

Question

I'm sorry, I've been posting this alot! But I just haven't found decent answers. This could be my chance to get him as my boyfriend.

I've known him for so long...
I like my good guy friend, how could i get him to ask me out?
Please don't say ask him out. I need more than that. I've known him for so long, and he doesn't flinch or pull away when I put an arm around him or anything because we are such good friends. He is always switching from girl to girl on who he likes and he really clings to me and calls me alot, i've been helping him get the girls he likes, but if they say no, he really doesn't care. I don't know what to do, I REALLY don't want to be turned down. I just really like him.

Also, when he talks to me, he's not afraid to get really close to my face. Also, we went to the homecoming game together, and he kept stealing my purse for some reason. He laughs at all my jokes, and smiles alot at me.

He doesn't like anybody at the moment, or atleast that is what he says.

I'm not trying to trick him! That would be rude. He's too good to me. But I'm just afraid to ask him out.

Answer 1

The reason why your stressing over this whole thing is because you have a mature viewpoint concerning this situation. This is an "All or nothing" situation, and if he say's "No", then you know that your friendship will never be the same.

Ok, first ask him how he feels about your friendship. Do this on a Sunday afternoon. Make sure that theres no distractions, and do this in an enviornment of tranquility/serenity.

He'll state how much he cares for you............ Grab him by his hand, look him in the eye, and ask him if you can be honest with somethings that been on your mind.

Tell him how much you value your friendship........and care about him.......but since__________ (Tell him the moment you realized that you fell in love with him) that deeper feelings have been stirred up, and you dont know how to come out and tell him how you truly feel.

What you want to do is basically confess how much you value your friendship, and how much you care for him. Then go deeper with your honesty. Tell him how these feelings are driving you crazy inside, and your scared because you dont know how this will affect your friendship.

Just open up to him, and be honest. Make yourself mention a few key points, and let your heart say the rest.

The one thing you dont want to do is freak him out though and go to, what Oprah calls, "The Ugly Cry". That may freak him out, but you know him better than I do.

Just make him as comfortable as possible, and lay how you feel for him out there. If you two have been best friends for the longest, he'll be able to handle what your about to lay on him.

This is Big, so dont drive yourself crazy with all of this. Just make sure your honest with yourself, and with him, and things will work out for the better.

I do have one question though. You mentioned that he was "Fickle" about the women that he is involved with, do you think that he'll be able to handle what you have to offer?

Answer 2

It sounds to me like he's into you. I don't think there's much chance of embarrassing yourself here. :) Unfortunately, you're so comfortable with each other, that even if you did flirt, he may not even notice. Go someplace where you can be alone. Tell him how you feel. Explain how you have feelings, and you're wondering if he may have them as well. Also mention how it's completely okay if he doesn't feel the same way and that the friendship will be the same as before. Or, you could turn the question the other way and say you feel like you've been getting vibes from him lately and ask if he possibly has feelings for you. This way he doesn't know you like him, and it's all in his hands! Personally I'd be honest and speak from the heart. What do you have to lose? If he likes you back, you have an exciting journey ahead of you. If it's simply platonic, it may be uncomfortable for a few days, but things will go back to normal. If you play shy for the rest of your life, you'll forever wonder - what if? Go for it, and the best of luck! :)

Answer 3

It sounds like he already does like you. The comfortability of being close, flirting, and the indifference toward the other girls makes it very possible. You could joke around one time when he is having a problem and say something like "why don't you just go out with me?" and notice his reaction. If he looks like he might be thinking about it or smiles at you, then you may just want to tell him how you feel. If that is too bold of an attempt then one day when you two are alone you should look into his eyes and smile. Then see how he reacts to that. Chances are, if he likes you he will smile back and you will just have a feeling that he likes you and you could tell him how you feel. Good Luck- but it sounds like everything will work out! =)

Answer 4

Ah the "friendzone". This can be difficult to get out of, depending on how good of friends you actually are. But my advice is to do slowly start to do things that mere friends would not do. Don't suddenly change overnight because it might scare him off. Getting this guy will be an intricate process that will require some patience. You have to continue to flirt with him (it shounds like you are) but subtly initiate even more contact. Put yourself into situations that will make him think of you more as a potential girlfriend (i.e. in his lap).

Now to speed the process up, just add alcohol. May sound a little dumb, but if you guys hang out after school or something...sip a little wine together. Things will take off real quick like. And to diminish thoughts that it is just a hookup...make sure that you do something romantic. Like look into his eyes and say something like "You know...I think I like you. Not just as a friend." Once you kiss...you're in.

Good luck. The friendzone can be a frustrating place.

Answer 5

In order to keep him as a friend, there is a special and very infrequently used idea that might work for you. JUST ASK HIM. Alot of guys don't like to be pushed into a "relationship" or tricked into one. They like to take things at their own speed. It sounds like he is getting there with you but either is going too slow or just wanting to stay friends. Either way, if you talk to him alone he would understand your feeling on the subject. He might be unsure and that might be why he is going so slow. Unfortunately or fortunately, not every boy-girl relationship has to be dating. Most close/strong relationships start by just hanging out and being friends with no added pressure of a "committed relationship." It sounds like you are younger with alot of years to look forward to for that. My advice would be to talk to him about your feelings but not to pressure him to make a "final" decision concerning you. You'll be better friends because of it and many times even more than just friends. Good luck.

Answer 6

Well I don't know what else to tell you besides YOU ASK HIM OUT. I don't even know why women will not ask guys out if that what they want. Go after what you want because as you can see it's not gonna come to you. Obviously he either doesn't see you like that or he knows and wants you to step up at the plate. You can ask and ask but guess what, waiting around can hurt you and then you won't be able to forgive yourself.

Just do it and get it over with. Hesitation kills.

Answer 7

Use a friend to tell him you're interested. Have her suggest something, rather than outright state, that she "thinks" you might be interested in him, in that way...have her report to you his reaction.

It sounds, though, that he's likely going to ask you out soon anyways. Don't worry so much about making him ask you, or you'll make him think you're desperate, and he'll get turned off. He's switching from girl to girl, telling you about them, because subconsciously he's using you as a comparison to them. He has you in his head as his ideal mate. He just needs to come to that realization on his own. It will probably be soon.

Answer 8

To be honest with you that is the answer. you can't con someone into asking you out. if you have known him for awhile then you should be comfortable to approach him and explain how you feel. Grow up and appraoch this maturely. if you like him tell him. it's that simple. your question has been answered you just don't want to except it. Conning someone is wrong. Expressing yourself is genuine. Think about it.

Answer 9

If you need to trick this guy into asking you out, then I think you aren't very good friends. If you were good friends, then you should be able to state how you feel and ask him out.

Using trickery or deceit to get someone to do something is a very despicable action.

Answer 10

Decide if you want him as a boyfriend or friend, because after you make it into a relationship, intimate, then after you break up, you won't have him as a friend any more. It happened to my daughter, and they were never as close after they broke up. They should have never become boyfriend and girlfriend, it was better the other way. She missed her friend, but was over.