Do you think it’s rude for someone to ask to attend your wedding?
For instance, my step-sister has friends that I know as acquaintances. The other day when she, my step-sister, called me she asked how the wedding planning was going. And all of the sudden I hear her friend asking her, to as me, if she can go to my wedding. Normally this would not offend me but due to what ever reason it did.
Am I wrong for thinking that she is rude for that?
I mean I have seen her a few times….. but she and I have no attachments, other than my step-sister.
2006-10-10 07:58:36 · 52 answers · asked by girl_in707 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I think it is rude, but only because I recently got married and know how much it costs per person at the wedding....why would you pay for people to be there that hardly know you and don't really care to celebrate with you? Some people just don't understand that, and it is a little pathetic that they would ASK you to invite them!! Very rude in my opinion!! Sorry that happened.... good luck with the wedding! best day of your life!!!
2006-10-10 08:03:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it depends on the situation. This summer an acquaintance of mine was getting married and everyone was asking if I was going. My BF's band was playing (and I am his ride) so I asked the groom if it was alright for me to go. The wedding/ reception started at 2pm and we went up at 9pm when my BF's band was to go on. So the food was already done and no extra cost to the couple. It was an open invite wedding anyway for the town (I live in a very small town) so it was no problem. I also still gave them a gift even though I wasn't there for the actually wedding. However, normally I would never ask I think it is very rude and if I was in your shoes I would be offended. Just let your step-sister know how you feel and maybe she can give you an explanation of what was going on and talk to her for you.
2006-10-10 10:01:07 · answer #2 · answered by fallenangelf99 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah that is pretty much as low as it gets. It puts you in a very stinky position. Because this person obviously doens't get it - it would be silly to be coy and beat around the bush. Come out and say no - you are not invited to this event - for budget reasons, seating reasons - or whatever you feel like saying. Weddings are expensive and I'm sure if you were a multi millionaire you would love to invite every person you have ever met - including the mail man too - but I'm sure that isn't the case. You are well in your rights to refuse to allow this guest to attend. Talk about someone with no class!
2006-10-10 08:01:47 · answer #3 · answered by OohLaLa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it was rude in a way, but if you think about at least she asked and didn't just show up uninvited. If you haven't yet given her an answer just check the head count and if you have already ordered enough food then sure allow her to come, but don't go inviting her just because your sister wants her there. This is your wedding, therefore it's your day. Do what you want, just don't turn into a bridezilla
2006-10-10 08:18:42 · answer #4 · answered by laranita82 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is totally up to you.
I read somewhere that if you are thinking that much about the issue, then they probably shouldn't be on the guest list. Have people you want there.
My fiance's sister in law wanted her parents to come to my wedding. I know who they are, and I've met them several of times, but I am not inviting them. I had to cut a lot of family (big familes are a pain sometimes--LOL) already to narrow things down. Plus she thinks I am evil because I have a tongue piercing and live with my fiance. So WHY would I invite her anyways????
If you really need to tell her something, I would explain to her that you can't invite everyone you would like to because of cost--and that you've had to cut your list down already. Even though it is not the truth, she won't know, but still let's her know you can't have everyone you would like to there. Maybe the venue only allows a certain number of people and there is just not enough room.
Telling her flat out 'no' or not responding at all is somewhat rude. Just tell her gently and hopefully she will understand.
2006-10-10 08:41:50 · answer #5 · answered by fallencupid79 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have many friends who are getting married now, and I've heard them say a few times that people asked if they were being invited to their wedding. I think if you need to ask for an invitation, you clearly aren't deserving to be invited to the wedding. Not to mention it is rude and puts the person in an awkward situation.
2006-10-10 10:56:27 · answer #6 · answered by Annie Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a bit rude. Especially when there is no specific connection between the two of you. If your best friend asked if she could come to your wedding you really wouldn't mind and of course say yes unless you were having a family only ceremony.
This is your and your fiances day so don't feel pressured to invite people you don't want to spend this time with you.
2006-10-10 08:02:50 · answer #7 · answered by bushbaby_rsa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's rude but sometimes people who have never planned a wedding don't get that. If you want to be gracious, invite her to the ceremony, but tell her that the caterer and baker already have a final head count for the reception. You can also say that you and the hubby wanted to invite the same number of people to keep the sides of the aisle even. A little sneaky, but it works!
2006-10-10 08:02:18 · answer #8 · answered by September 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that is rude. Some people view weddings as a big party and free food. I think it's a very personal experience and should include only the people you want it to.
I had a very small wedding with only family because I didn't want to cloud my day with a bunch of "friends" and people I barely knew.
Who you invite is purely up to you and don't let others take advantage of you.
2006-10-10 08:01:46 · answer #9 · answered by Sativa 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that it is rude but rather inconsiderate. If you had planned on inviting them, would you have not already done that? This isn't a party, it's a celebration for you and your soon-to-be spouse, a celebration that you have both made the decision to share with those close to you and who have meaning in your life. If your step sister is going and is standing up for her friend, ask your step sister if she would take her friend as her date if it means that much to them. Don't bother about making everyone happy, the day is about you and your partner.
2006-10-10 08:03:36 · answer #10 · answered by coolguy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋