What would you do if the person you have been involved with for six years and you loved with all your heart makes you feel less of a person, just because of a "mental/thoughts" issue i'm currently dealing with from my past? Mind you, its regarding my parents, should I be looked as a bad person because of the way my parents were,are,is and will be for ever? I think its wrong for anyone to judge about anybody. God should be the only one to judge, why should I tolerate my partner making me feel this way? I've explained over and over to my partner how I find myself feeling and all my partner has to say to that is nothing. No consideration for how i feel, almost as if I have no say in anything, and what my partner says its what goes...anyways, what would you do if this was you? I find myself battleing myself inside, in deciding whether I should stay or If I should go. My mind says go, but my heart says stay, how do I handle a situation like that? Some positive advise would be great.
2006-10-10 04:23:01 · 13 answers · asked by anonymous 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
FYI: My partner treats every situation the same ever since relocating to a new state, where I have no friends and/or family. My partner on the other hand has a sister and brother in our area. I feel as if my partner did a 360 degree turn ever since moving here. I've been seeking professional help, but this situation took place lastnight, and my professional doctor who evaluates me is out in maturnity leave so im stuck alone with no one to express my anger and rage im feeling inside. I feel like its just builing up higher and high and im reaching the boiling point. Sometimes its better to talk to some one who's not bias to either one of us, and look in and tell me what you see. Its why im turning to pc screen to find answers. I'm really trying to reach out, im just feeling short handed at the moment. Positive thoughts and advise is really needed at this moment, please share true thoughts and feelings...thank you!
2006-10-10 04:41:52 · update #1
You should never have to feel this way especially from your partner. He should be the one uplifting you and making this into more of a positive situation instead of acting as if he doesn't care. Where is respect for you when it's either his way or no way at all????? You are somebody special and you don't deserve to feel this way. It seems that you have talked to him about this in a round about sort of way, but he still ignores you. You will never be able to deal with the issues from the past with your parents if you continue to be with a man like this who is very negative, not to add that he wouldn't care about other issues that would bother you down the road as well. You can feel like this on your own, you don't need his help. He is insensitive and you need to make a desicion of whether you want to continue to live your life and feel this way with this man, or take the risks of having a better life by having and being around postive people that will in turn inspire you to be positive as well. Don't let him or your parents destroy you in the inside because it's not worth it in the end. You only have this one life so live your life now and be happy. Good luck!!!
2006-10-10 04:48:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should know that your partner should respect your feelings. Even If he does not know exactly what to say. Ask yourself if it is words from your partner you are looking for or just a little comfort from your partner that you need. Not everyone can understand feelings. Your partner may have some built up feelings too. Maybe comfort your partner in a way your partner needs and then your partner will comfort you in a way you need. Words don't always work. Know in some way that your partner cares for your feelings is not just saying what you want to hear, but holding you and just listening. Sometimes that is a way of showing feelings. I really hope this helps a little. Good luck
2006-10-10 05:26:06 · answer #2 · answered by nbubbyjak 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way your parents are has nothing to do with the person you are.Sometimes it's easier to talk to a stranger than the person right next to you. A stranger looks and listens with virgin ears cause they don't know you. As for you spouse, they never listen anyway. Or maybe they don't know what to say cause they love you and don't want to say the wrong thing. Look to a professional or someone else to help. But remember you are your own person not that of your parents
2006-10-10 04:30:12 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your partner cannot relate to your problem and does not really know how to console you. The best way to deal with this is to talk to you partner and tell her that you feel alone and you feel like she's not helping you at all. Maybe you guys should reach a compromise. It's not all bad..you just need to communicate more :-)
2006-10-10 04:29:48 · answer #4 · answered by wittlewabbit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
does he treat your feelings like that in every situation or just the one with your parents? If this is the only time, then i would just have to say that he doesn't know how to help you but doesn't want to admit it.
If he treats your feelings like that all the time...sorry but i would say to leave!! Your feelings and concerns are a very important part of you and should be of utmost importance to him also!! You deserve someone to love everything about you and to help you when you have a problem.
Good Luck!!
2006-10-10 04:28:53 · answer #5 · answered by polarbaby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should leave him , just to wake him up,just so he can stop taking you for granted, nobody deserves to be treated that way!! and sometimes it takes a drastic move for someone to re-evaluate things. and if he agrees to start being more considerate(basically what you need from him)then start over,start fresh, and don't ever think you are less of a person, because your not.
2006-10-10 09:59:39 · answer #6 · answered by rae 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
everything our parent does in past has nothing to do with us...dont feel guilty about that or feel bothered...if ur partner says nothing its mean dats its really nothing to him...maybe ur negative thoughts blinded u and make u not realize or trust ur partner words...why let ur relationship suffer becoz of some mistakes happen in past...leave ur worries to God..try to have counselling or make urself useful by doing things that makes u busy and divert ur attentions from being worry...arent u realize that always repeating and asking the same topic to ur partner makes him annoy or give him some bad thingking regarding u and ur relationship..just move on and dont look back....
2006-10-10 04:36:05 · answer #7 · answered by rare_1428 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one person should be able to make you feel "less of a person". You have to be happy in who you are, with or without that person;s opinion. You may value someone's opinion, and their opinion may make you re-think something, but they should never de-value you as a human. You are who you are. If someone is inconsiderate, you may want to consider further who you hang onto... Good luck, dear!
2006-10-10 04:27:35 · answer #8 · answered by daj11551 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, but I think you should go. The "positive" you are searching for should be coming from your partner - not strangers.
I care and I don't even know you. Doesn't say much for your partner, does it?
2006-10-10 04:30:21 · answer #9 · answered by risa131313 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would leave him as soon as possible. You shouldn't tolerate it. A relationship should be 50/50, and if it's not get out of it. Your feelings count and you should be respected.
2006-10-10 04:27:44 · answer #10 · answered by doglady 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋