Emotional wounds?

Question

I've been through alot in the past 2 years. I have alot of emotional wounds. Have you ever been through anything that was difficult to get over? How did you finally get over it?

Answer 1

A man goes to a shop, picks up a beautiful cup and says "my god this cup is so beautiful" and suddenly the cup starts talking to the man. The cup starts saying "O man, I am beautiful right now, but what was the state of my being before the pot-maker made me a beautiful pot?

Before I was sheer mud and the pot-maker pulled me out of the mud from the mother earth and I felt why that pot-maker is so cruel, he has separated me from mother earth. I felt a tremendous pain. And the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then he put me and churned me, when I was churned I felt so giddy, so painful, so stressful, I asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then he put me into a oven and heated me up, I felt completely burnt. There was tremendous pain and I asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" and the pot-maker said, "Just wait."

Then he poured hot paint on me and I felt the fume and the pain, I again asked the pot-maker "Why are you so cruel?" and the pot-maker said, "Just wait." Then again he put me into an oven and heated it to make me more strong, I felt life is so painful hence pleaded the pot-maker and the pot-maker said, "Just wait." And after that the pot-maker took me to the mirror and said, "Now look at yourself". And surprisingly I found myself so beautiful.

When god gives us lot of trouble, it appears god is very cruel but we need patience and we have to wait. When bad things happen to good people, they become better and not bitter.

So all difficulties are part of a cosmic design to make us really beautiful. We need patience, we need understanding, we need the commitment to go through in a very calm and wise way. So all difficulties are not to tumble us but to humble us.

With this understanding, let us not be against difficulty. Understand difficulty is a part of a purifying process. A purifying process at present which we cannot understand and hence we need faith and we need trust.

Let us understand how to handle stress with this background. You can be affected by stress from two angles. There is an internal stress and there is an external stress. Nobody can avoid stress; one has to only manage stress. Managing stress can be internal and also external.

The internal stress is; your thoughts can create stress, your values can create stress, and your beliefs can create stress, meaning thereby your stress is coming from your mind more from the outer world. Many people suffer not from heart attack - they suffer from thought-attack.

For example, when somebody says you are an idiot, we get so hurt, we get so victimised. My boss has called me an idiot and I am feeling tremendous pain. Now where does this stress come from? If my boss has called me an idiot, I have to ask myself "am I an idiot"?

If I am an idiot nothing to be upset about; and if I am not an idiot, then also nothing to be upset about! It is the perception of the boss. But why do we suffer from that stress? I suffer not because my boss has called me an idiot but because of the thought-attack.

I may say the boss has called me an idiot; therefore I am suffering? It is true that the words are unpleasant. But what hurts is the interpretation of the unpleasant word. The thought in me interprets. That is pain and therefore it becomes pain. Much of our stress is our mind interpreting it as pain. So we suffer from thought-attack more than heart attack.
Swami Sukhabodhananda
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Satsang

How can I know my mind?
An alert mind is not a problem; an unaware mind is. The mind projects the future to be fulfilling but misses the beauty of the present. If you are rich, you want to be richer; if you are strong, you want to be stronger; if you are beautiful, you want to be more beautiful. Such a mind does not make you live life but leave life.

Such a mind creates false prayers. You make a ritual out of prayer and pretend to pray. Such prayer becomes an empty gesture.

Why am I so greedy?
There is a visible world and there is an invisible world. There is a visible self and an invisible self. The visible world is a world of diversity and the invisible world is a world of oneness.

If we live on the periphery we will feel incomplete but completeness is one’s nature. This incompleteness wants us to be a complete person. But the only track it knows is greed, wanting more. The enlightened masters give us not a dogma but a device to reach this state of completeness.

We should stop fooling around with life. Just thinking to be happy is not enough; just thinking to be wise is not enough. It is a luxury to think but it is wisdom to live. Ask yourself: Are you concerned with reality or fantasy?

There are two ways to know reality. If you want to know objective reality, then science is the way out. If you want to know subjective reality, turn to spirituality.

Why does one worry in life ?
Worry has become a habit for many. An inner energy that is not creative goes around in circles of worry. A creative person is one who, when he encounters a problem, is focused on the solution and is not a victim to the problem. Convert the problem into a springboard for possibilities.

A doctor does not cure illness but allows the healing process within to surface by giving it the right condition. So, too, the true healer exists within you. But you have to create the right condition. By looking at the mountain you can’t climb the mountain, you should will yourself to climb the mountain. Optimise this will for you to be above worry.

What should one do to be successful in life?
Ultimately what you need is self-confidence, mental toughness, commitment to excel and the ability to use the power of imagination.

What do you mean by self-confidence?
There are three pillars of self-confidence: Feeling good, taking responsibility and developing skills. There are both healthy ways and unhealthy ways of feeling good. You should develop the discipline to feel good in a healthy way. The quality of one’s life is the quality of one’s consistent feeling. There are techniques that are taught how to hold and maintain consistent feelings of empowerment within you.

How does one acquire clarity?
Clarity is acquired not by knowledge but by knowing. It is not a belief system; it is intelligence operating in the domain of freedom. The true meaning of renunciation is not renouncing the world but renouncing bondage. When bondage is renounced there is freedom, the most important thing. In freedom lies intelligence. It is not just discipline but true freedom. Freedom is not something devoid of order; it is a flowering of order.

Answer 2

I have throughout my whole life and it's taken me 28 years to really deal with alot of it. I started pray and believe in what I asked God for. I understood that no matter ho many mistakes I've made no matter where I come from or no matter I bad my past might have been. That God still loved me unconditionally. that he forgave me for all of my wrong doing and that i had to forgive myself. Sometimes it would get to the point that I wanted to die or all I thought about was dying that I wasn't living. And when I say that I mean I was doing very stupid things not thinking or even caring about the out come of it . But now I'm living and taking one day at a time. I tend to rely more on God than myself and man. So I'm here to tell you that every day wont be easy but with God in your life it will be so much better. I know things seem hard but turn it over to God let him help you pray, talk to him believe me there's no problem to great for him. I hope everything works out for you. But you have to believe and then only then you will receive

Answer 3

Seeking God is number one.This is what I did shortly after breaking my neck in an accident eight years ago.I owned my own construction company and lost it all.I wasn't in good hands with Allstate like I thought I was.The second thing was to get with a doctor.He prescribed an anti-depressant but it didn't work.I went back to him and this time he prescribed one that worked.I took Prozac for about five months and kept my doctor informed of my progress.At that time the doctor felt I wouldn't need it any longer.I continue to serve the Lord everyday. I still face adversities but my mind is clear and strong, I am able now to make good choices which involve serving the Lord.This may sound strange but now I am thankful that all these things happened for without them I would have never known the happiness that I know to day.

Answer 4

Sure. I found that it just takes time and a lot of talking. Some experiences I've had took years to get over. Some I still grapple with today. It can be an on-going process. I always talk about my feeling with my friends. Time and talking are great healers. Above all, have patience with yourself. And if you don't feel you are having much success with it, talk to a counselor. They can help you put things in perspective. I wish you well.

Answer 5

I was verbally abused by my class teacher when I was young. She was a real b*itch and she could fault me for the slightest problems. Because of that, the students in the class never liked me and hated me due to what she said. It was emotional. My parents were not sympathetic. They had traditional perception on what school was like.

Subsequently, I lost confidence in myself and I could not be confident in what I do. I need the army to give me some esteem.

You can be assured I would not let any bit*ches ill treat my children ever again. I get my lawyer.

Answer 6

It's hard. I turned to God and found faith to get me through. Others have turned to science. However, thanks to my faith, I'm no longer depressed and suicidal. I do hope and pray that things look up for you.