Okay, first off I want to say this boy is living with me because our moms are together(lesbians). He is 13 and I am 16. They have been living with us for a year now. When they first moved in, him and I had to share my queen sized bed for 3 months before we moved into the bigger room and moved to seperate beds. We now live in a different house with our own rooms, but I just want to say that we have become good friends because of sharing a room for 6 months. I also want to point out that I am NOT gay. Dont steriotype the situation because of my mom's sexuality. Here is what he is doing, example: We are in my room and I am laying on my side watching him play a video game and out of nowhere he decides to lay against me while playing. I'm not talking about just scooting back and useing me as a prop-up, he laid his body against my stomach/chest and rested his face against my chest while playing.
2006-10-10 02:30:22 · 20 answers · asked by Blaine 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I thought this was pretty weird, but I figured that he just felt really comfortable with me and I tried to take it as a compliment. Well about 10 minutes later he sits back up and plays for around another 10 - 15 minutes and then decides to lay back down. This time he just laid back and rested his head in the place between my bellybutton and manhood. NONE of my friends from school has EVER done anything like this and would probably freak if I told them about what he did. I wouldn't even bother to show concern and ask this question here if I knew for a fact that he isn't gay, but when you grow up with a gay mother, hang out with nothing but girls at school, not being into sports, and is a very sensitive person, it makes you wonder. I WOULD like to ask him about it, but him being the type of person he is, he would definitly try to avoid saying the truth and would act weird around me for a while. I would also like to say this before anyone says it.
2006-10-10 02:30:46 · update #1
We was FULLY aware of what he was doing and was not just so much into the game that he didn't realize it because when he laid back he would get comfortable. He is also a very smart 13 year old with straight A's and knows what is right and wrong to do with other boys. To rule out something else, He does have a father that he goes and stays with him for several days every month, so I'm definitly not like a father figure to him. Well.. I hope I gave enough information to you guys and you can tell I'm very concerned because of this question being so long.
I would REALLY appreciate some MATURE responses to this question and some good advice. Thanks!
2006-10-10 02:31:04 · update #2
This is not about his sexuality, which he is just learning about at 13, but about you. He made you uncomfortable. You think he is cool and you two hang out so what difference does it make if he is gay.
Talk to him about how you feel. Let him know that you are not that comfortable being that physically close to another guy.
Also remember when you were 13 and even now at 16 you have all sorts of hormones and emotions going on so he may be confused right now. Treat him like a little brother and emulate physical contact that is comfortable and appropriate for brothers.
2006-10-10 02:53:39 · answer #1 · answered by maynorda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like to me that he is really a little too comfortable with the whole situation. Maybe due to his Mom being a lesbian, over the years, he probably never had anybody in the same situation with him and now he does so he feels that comfy doing what he is doing to you. If you are not gay and are not sure about him, it wouldn't hurt to sit with him and ask him. After all, you guys are teenagers and if he feels this comfy with you, it shouldn't be a problem to ask him why he does that. But, try to do it in a nice way and not blow up at him or be agressive. I am sure he will answer you. He, however, might be gay, and if that is the case, you can express to him that YOU are NOT and you have no interest in becoming so. It makes no difference if your Moms are Lesbians, they are individuals just like you and him and everybody else. If you prefer he not lay back on you while chillin out, just let him know although HE may feel comfy about it, you are not to comfy about the situation. Hope this helps....every person has their own identity and individuality and stand firm in what you believe...you can be nice about it and see how it goes for awhile. Assure him you have no problem being there for him as a best friend, etc but not in a sexual kind of way and that his behavior is making you feel that it is leading up to sexual things.
2006-10-10 02:38:24 · answer #2 · answered by bradnmich2003 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have two sons that are very close 7 & 14. The 7 year old is this comfortable with his big brother and really looks up to him as a role model. The 14 year old is uncomfortable with his brothers affection also. I also have 9 nephews ranging from 2 thru 27and I would say that a boy in this age group should not be that comfortable about being touchy-feely like this. I think you need to talk to your mother and explain that you are uncomfortable with him acting this way so she can evaluate the situation.
2006-10-10 02:54:00 · answer #3 · answered by American Pride 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really cant be the judge of this,but maybe just maybe he is feeling alot comfortable with you,,hanging out with you,,and yes you might be a fahter figure to him. Just because he sees his dad a few times a month doesnt mean hes that close with him. You are the one who is there with him and there for him. You cant say hes gay just because of these actions. You have to watch him more closely when hes around different people and friends. Listen to things he says. I dont feel from what you have said here,,that these are grounds for thinking he might be gay. Because your moms are doesnt mean hes going to be the same way.Obviously because you are straight. Just keep an eye out if you are concerned. But dont bring it up to him yet. I really think that hes just a sensitive person whos looking for some closeness and whos a very loving person. Not a big deal right now.
2006-10-10 02:39:40 · answer #4 · answered by michelle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While there is a possibility, he just may be looking towards you for comfort and stability. Thirteen is pretty young to have watched his parents get a divorce and have his Mother move into a lesbian relationship. He may be just looking for friendship from you. The best thing to do...is NICELY and simply ask him. If he says yes he is, say that's cool but I'm not into that personally. Let him know that you will still be his friend. Good Luck
2006-10-10 02:35:59 · answer #5 · answered by trivia buff 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would just let it go. The next time he does something like that pretend you have to go to the bathroom or something. He's 13 and maybe he is confused about his sexuality. It might of been a one time thing or maybe just an innocent thing. Start talking about girls around him (there's this hot girl at school and...) See how he responds.. It obviously makes you uncomfortable. If it starts to happen on different occasions, then its time to have a talk with your friend. Good luck.
2006-10-10 02:40:37 · answer #6 · answered by Aidge 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no no no no no, guys don't do that, period. he's really into u i guess. what with having a gay mother and all, he may have taken after her. dude, anytime he doesn't something that bothers u like that, at least tell him something. u shoud've told him before because now he did what he did and you didn't say anything, so he'll probably think your gay too and continue touching u or whatever.
2006-10-10 02:58:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you really need to talk to him about it. If you are uncomfortable then you need to tell him. Friends are honest with eachother. I think that you have to get it out in the open about how you are feeling and would like to remain his friend. He may think of you as a brother and brothers are a symbol of stability. Let him know how you feel.
2006-10-10 02:46:19 · answer #8 · answered by Moon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's treating you like a brother.
But if you are sure that it wasn't an accident that he put his head down low, then you have your answer. He might not even know yet, so there is no point in asking him.
Tell him to get a pillow if he wants to lay down again.
2006-10-10 02:38:03 · answer #9 · answered by ee 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your stepbrother or whatever you see him as knows what he is doing. Guys dont visit with one another like that. He knows what he wants and you need to tell him your uncomfortable whenever this happens.He sounds like a nice kid but dont subject yourself to this odd surrounding.Tell him there is nothing wrong with the way he is but you choose not to go that route
2006-10-10 02:38:11 · answer #10 · answered by Billy T 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋