We started out good had love and sex for 4 months.Then when she wanted 3 months to herself mostly,I stilled called her alot ect.She said I am to insecure to "HOOK UP" with.So for 5 months we have been friend with benefits.She is not interested in committment at all.I just want what we had before Is there no hope? She had to terrible[abusive]marriages in past.I have never been married and am 50 she is 49
2006-10-10 01:12:22 · 11 answers · asked by ? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it could be one of two things. either she really doesn't want to be with you and she's trying to let you down easy or she's scared that if she gets too close to you, you'll end up hurting her like her last husband. either way you should talk to her and ask her to be completely honest. figure out what she's thinking but know this. a "friends with benefits" situation isn't good. it will cause you to become attatched and you'll most likely get hurt in the end. know what you want and if she doesnt want the same, then its not worth it.
2006-10-10 01:16:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would point out 2 things to you.
First, you sound insecure to me, too. When she asked for a little privacy, you "called her alot ect." You need to be confident enough to allow her to have her own time to be herself.
Second, I find it hard to believe that you are 50 years old. Read your own question. You sound like a jr. high school kid playing out a typical jr. high school micro drama.
Suggestions:
1) Give her the space she needs.
2) Continue to treat her (and every woman you date) the best you can.
3) DON"T just sit there by yourself feeling sorry for yourself. Go out and find another lady to spend time with.
4) Continue to enjoy "benefits".
5) Upgrade yourself. Anyone can speak to a woman once, but few men get a second chance. Practice your grammer, don't use terms you don't understand, and when writing, use your spell check.
Usually guys look for women that are similar in social status, age, and economic class. Upgrade yourself and ask out a woman who you may have previously been too intimidated to ask.
I know you feel like this woman may be 'the one', but if she's not feeling it too, you'll have to accept it and move on.
Go out there and find a woman who shares the same wants and needs as you. They're out there, and as long as you treat them with respect and honesty, and expect the same from them, you stand a pretty good chance at meeting and dating a good woman.
^ note: Every woman is good for somebody. Finding the one that's good for you is the challenge.
2006-10-10 09:06:33 · answer #2 · answered by michaelsmaniacal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
their are alot of women out there. Why go through this.
Maybe a 49, she really has not grown up.
Fine a real woman, without baggage.
2006-10-10 08:20:47 · answer #3 · answered by Eve 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry..im not trying to be mean...but she's not interested in u...ur on 2 different pages....relationships go forwards not backwards...quite honestly she can go hav sex with whoever...i don't think she really needs you for that...she needs to go find herself and get over her divorce and maybe stop blaming other guys...dump her...sex is not a good enough reason...
2006-10-10 08:20:51 · answer #4 · answered by Yasi D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she decided that u weren't the type for her....but loved your sex so has you on the "friends with benefits" terms until she finds someone that suits her
2006-10-10 08:25:20 · answer #5 · answered by xxd0p3yxx 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is apparent that you two have different interests. Your on separate paths. If you want more than the friends with benefits...you need to let her know and move on.
2006-10-10 08:14:38 · answer #6 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
apparently she feels insecure, and after what happened to her she seems afraid to settle down and really get to know some on ebecause she is scared of getting to know thier bad side
2006-10-10 08:15:10 · answer #7 · answered by emaria 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is your Father doing interfering in your sex life
2006-10-10 08:14:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well just take it easy.. don't make yourself seem so available... try to hang out with other women.. ect. don't be so caught up in her, and she'll eventually realize what she has and want to settle down, and if she doesn't, then it wasn't meant to be
2006-10-10 08:17:34 · answer #9 · answered by holly w 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
perhaps she is waiting to see if you are really the one she is looking for. but honestly, i would say that she isnt looking to fall in love right now.
2006-10-10 08:16:28 · answer #10 · answered by blondie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋