there was only one thing I asked my girl to never do to me, and that was lie. I don't care how bad the truth was, I'll get over it. Just don't LIE!!! We have been dating for two years now. I heard her phone ring at 3 am like three months ago, so I looked to see who it was. It was some dude named don! I was pissed! She said that he was an old friend and had a question about his girl. I asked her to have him stop calling, especially at 3 am. She agreed. Two days ago I saw that she was talking to him on myspace. Nothing sexual, but still. I confronted her about it and it turns out they used to date. She lied before and said they didn't. I don't know what to believe now because I caught her in a lie. What should I do? I love her, but I don't want her to walk all over me. HELP!
2006-10-09 16:00:41 · 22 answers · asked by B man 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I only checked her phone because it woke me up at 3 am. I thought someone was dying or something.
2006-10-09 16:13:17 · update #1
If you really truly love her, I dont think it's something that you need to end the relationship over. Any good relationship is built on trust and honesty, but it sounds to me like she was trying not to hurt you. She was probably scared you'd get jealous if you knew that he was a past flame. Talk to your girlfriend and explain how important it is to you that she is honest. Tell her how much she hurt you and how hard a time you are having trusting her now. If you both sit down and discuss it, I'm sure you can work things out and come to a solution. But if she does it again... dump her.
2006-10-09 16:05:49 · answer #1 · answered by deepwaters05 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
By you watching her every move and looking at her email you are forcing her to lie. You became upset at the late phone call (understandably) but then to question her? You can have an ex that can be also a friend. She is afraid to tell you the truth causing you to cry "liar". Relax, let her explain. If you still think she is a liar, maybe you are looking for a way out. It's called a self full-filling prophecy.
Slow down and let her explain. Good luck.
2006-10-09 16:10:02 · answer #2 · answered by Bexcy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds like you dont trust her very much any way if you check her phone. But she said he was an old friend did you ask if they went out. Girls see it as dont ask dont tell. So you have to ask more questions before you say she lied. Was there relationship more than a friends would be or physical. My husband gets mad when I talk on myspace but then I let him be a part of it. He knows all my pass words and can check anytime. Its all about trust.
2006-10-09 16:07:52 · answer #3 · answered by Kathy D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she just said it to make you stop worrying. because she knows that there is nothing between them anymore...but see guys tend to overreact in these type of situations, soo girls tend to "lie" even though i agree that it isn`t the right thing to do.
i think you should just keep things chill for now. and then if you find more signs of her lying + canoodling with the guy ...then i`d say dump her. but give her a chance
2006-10-09 16:03:51 · answer #4 · answered by shopisotonix11 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell mi that u have never lied in your whole life.... if u say no then u are telling mi a big lie.... u have 2 understand that telling lies are part n parcel of life.... They used 2 date each other but they are not dating each other now.....u have to understand why she did not tell you... coz she feared that she would hurt some1 whom she loves..... u got 2 undertand that she lied to u coz she love u 2 deeply..........That doesnt mean wat she did is also correct... but what i suggest 2 u 2 is to have a good talk CLAMLY......... whatever happens never breakup.... coz if u do u are gonna lose sum1 who loves u deeply.....
2006-10-09 16:10:25 · answer #5 · answered by Rina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Accept the fact that she lies and lies very easily, and could be lying about many other things, too.
2. End it with her and find an honest girl with integrity.
Your choice.
(I'd go with #2 because you know what they say... lies are like roaches.... you might only see 1, but there are many more hiding in the cracks.)
2006-10-09 16:06:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women will do this if they think you'll be mad at them. She doesn't want to upset you. It's perfectly normal and she probably cares about you.
As for her talking to the ex, nothing good can come from that. I would put an end to that. Be careful how you go about it though if you decide to.
2006-10-09 16:05:21 · answer #7 · answered by Mitch B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope don't dump her, maybe she was afraid of loosing you. Just tell her that she can tell you anything and that she shouldn't lie, and if she continues to lie we could fade away. also confront her about how your feeling about her talking to that guy, if it offends you then let her know that!
2006-10-09 16:05:18 · answer #8 · answered by Jamie P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont dump her. she was only trying to protect ur feelings men usually get jealous over petty things like ex boyfriends. then again you have to find out if they are still into each other cos u dont wanna be the rebound guy
2006-10-09 16:04:10 · answer #9 · answered by 0 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She doesn't look like she cares about how you feel. Tell her you know the truth but don't tell her the truth. make her confront you. Try to make her feel guilty about what she has done. If she doesn't look like she feels guilty, then it's bad news for you.
2006-10-09 16:07:22 · answer #10 · answered by melomane 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋