what would you do? Could you talk to them about it?? Or, would you just get mad and never speak to them again?? This happened to a friend of mine! Her son refused to drink milk; so the friend spanked him for refusing!! My friend got totally furious!! They are no longer friends!! Could you forgive this???
2006-10-09 14:43:50 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Probably; it depends on how close as friends we really were to begin with! And, also if my child was even bothered by what happened!
2006-10-09 15:12:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think any ones should spank your child without your permission. I would have a talk with my friend, but I would be rageing mad and might need a day or two to calm down. I don't spank my child nobody eles should. And for something like not drinking milk, come on sounds like the friend is a control freak. The kid was not putting itselef or anybody eles in danger, and was not hurting anything. She should not let her child go to that persons house any more, sounds like maybe they were abused as a child!!!
2006-10-09 21:49:18 · answer #2 · answered by Jennifer Dalpe 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Even though I am a big believer in spanking I would have been pretty mad about this. But I blame the mother. Along with all the other things --discipline methods should be specifically discussed with the babysitter. If Mom does not want the babysitter to spank then obviously it should not happen.
With my kids I do not want babysitters spanking--it they do something that deserves a spanking I give it when I get home. There are only two exceptions to this--my Mom and my sister.
2006-10-10 01:18:47 · answer #3 · answered by beckychr007 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If this "friend" spanked my child with out permission and she/he KNEW I do not approve of spanking, I would tell this friend she/he is not allowed to watch my child again.
I would also consider not being their friend as they would not respect my parenting.
If this friend didn't know my non-spanking, I would have a major discussion with this friend of spanking not being allowed. I would direct him/her with other ways of punnishing my child that I feel is acceptable at her/his level as a babysitter.
Yet, If I didn't know that friend to the point he/she didn't know my rules on spanking, she/he wouldn't watch my kids in the first place.
I would of became extremly furious if my "friend" spanked my child for not drinking milk. That is a big anger issue if she spanks over milk! If the child didn't walk milk, he shouldn't be forced to nor spanked because he didn't want to at the time. I do find that a sign of physical abuse if she gets upset that easily.
2006-10-10 00:03:55 · answer #4 · answered by Mutchkin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The babysitter has/had the permission of the friend. Once the parent says OK I am leaving now this is when the babysitters job began.
The problem it sounds like is the spanking was not the problem it was not asking the parent (who was not there) permission to spank this child.
Hello the parent left the babysitter in charge.
This does not sound like a friendship to me to start with! This sounds like a user and the usie to me!
Sounds like the kid was old enough to tell on babysitter? OK now what did this kid learn? The authorities figures in his/her life I do not have to listen to. If they punish me I will tell mommy. Even older kid...will call mom up for the jail and tell mom that they have the wrong kid, there framing him.
I have had all three kids in daycare/babysitters before. A Babysitter or daycare provider knows my views of spanking before ever leaving my children with them......
2006-10-09 22:06:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think it really depends on the severity of the spank and if my friend knew my rules about spanking. if she knew that i didnt spank my child and she did it anyway, i would not be friends with her anymore, not only is that not right to my child it is outright disrespect to me. and the fact that him not drinking milk would not harm anyone, he didnt break anything, he wasnt really even being bad, just didnt want milk, that is not appropriate to spank a child or any kind of punishment for that matter. yeah, that couldnt be forgiven, that would end the friendship right there
2006-10-09 23:44:59 · answer #6 · answered by krystal 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would have to have a talk with my friend and explain that spanking is not an appropriate punishment for my child... I would also want to explain why we could no long have a friendship due to the physical assault (yes I consider spanking a physical assault) of my child...
Talking with the other person would give my child and I closure as without that closure we couldn't move toward healing... The talk would also tell the friend exactly where and why the friendship broke up.. Hopefully the friend will not make the same mistake in the future with another friend knowing where it got them this time...
I could forgive but the friendship is irreveribly damaged and would not continue because continueing a friendship would be a betrayal of my child and his/her well being because of the physical assault that occured... It would not be fair to my child if I remained close to someone who would treat them so poorly...
2006-10-09 21:56:56 · answer #7 · answered by Diane (PFLAG) 7 · 1⤊ 4⤋
It really depends on what you know about the past with that friend. I am not totally against light spankings when they are done for logical reasons. Adults that just hit kids when they are mad are wrong.
I would start with a conversation and ask your friend why he/she did it. Then explain your feelings and ask that it not happen again.
The conversation should tell you the true intentions of the person.
2006-10-09 21:48:52 · answer #8 · answered by shakopcool 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Because he wouldn't drink milk??? Wow, it sounds as if that person should not be around children alone, what if they would have done something worse(which kids will do)that is a tough one, but I don't think I would talk to them again.
2006-10-09 22:15:21 · answer #9 · answered by - 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
depends on the situation,spanking for not drinking milk is overboard which i would give an ear full to my soon to be ex friend.
If my son is doing something like playing with matches, trying to hurt someone,or trying out for the part of demon spawn(he is good at that) heck yea spank him.
in your friends situation i think i would flip out and never speak to them again.
don't get the wrong idea,i do spank my son but i only do it on his bottom with open hand,then after he is done crying i sit down with him and explain why i spanked him.
2006-10-09 22:00:30 · answer #10 · answered by cuervo25_1 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋