I'm 13 years old and my mom is 41. She was diagnosed w/ Lupus, Fibermialgera, and Rheumatoid Arthritis when I was just 2 years old. Her dream was to be a mom to a son cause she was a tomboy and a huge body builder and loved sports. I love my mom but she progressivly is going down hill and it's not looking good for her if you know what i mean?!?!!?!?!? Now she has to go in for surgery soon because of soming called...oh i cant think of it right now but it's a growth in her spine where in a couple of years she will be humped over if she dosnt get it takin care of. And shes become very depressed and suicidal and im very worried. PLEASE PLEEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE if you have any cures,suggestions or anything please help me!
2006-10-09 12:34:56 · 15 answers · asked by C.J. W 3 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Other - Diseases
Plus: My dad left me and my mom before i was born. The final straw was when that punk threw a lamp at her!
2006-10-09 12:59:48 · update #1
I to have Lupus and understand completely what your Mother is going through. Your Mother is feeling what I have felt many times. It is a horrible disease that runs your life. The pain at times can be unbearable and knowing it will only get worse causes suicidal thoughts. Your Mother, if she is not already, needs to be put on anti-depressants. Your Mother has a disease that goes with Lupus in a lot of people and that is osteoporosis. It is a degenerated disease of the bones in the body and mostly in the spinal area. I know your Mother is looking at this as just another thing she has to go through and that is very depressing. I can sympathy with her right now because I have degenerated disc in my neck and the pain has lead me to the same thoughts as your Mother. The one thing that keeps me going is I could not be selfish and leave my Son with the thoughts of what his Mother did. You need to reassure your Mother that you need her and ask her if she has given any thought to what committing suicide would do to you and your life. There are days that are worse than others and you have to assure her that you will be there for her and you need her in your life. I could go on and on about what this horrible disease does to a person and their mind thoughts but Honey please just be there for your Mother. You are so young to have such a responsibility but I know my Son would rather have the responsibility than not have me at all. The one thing I do each day is look back at the day and I have found in everyday there was a moment of pleasure, if only a smile, a TV Show, a small laugh, and think if I had not been here I would have missed that moment. My Son wrote me a wonderful verse and I will pass it to you to share with your Mother.
I Treasure every Moment as if to slow the Passing Seconds, that turn into Minutes of another Hour and Beautiful Day With You.
I read what my Son wrote me when I am very low and don't think I can go on and it gives me the strength, through Him, to Stay on this Earth until I am called Home. A Son the could write that to his Mother, is a Mother that can not leave her Son.
I am so sorry there is not a cure for Lupus that could help your Mother. The one thing you have to let her know is how much you love her and make her understand how selfish it would be to leave you behind at your young age.
2006-10-09 13:26:56 · answer #1 · answered by Juliet 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry that you have this burden to carry at just 13 years and you need to pray to God to give you strength in your spirit to endure and to help your Mom survive. Fibearmialgera is not fatal,you do not die from it and neither from Rheumatoid arthritis although it is painful esp in the morning-suggest to you Mom that she go to the Health Food Store and get Shark Cartilage it can help the Rheumatoid Arthritis and possible strengthen her spine where the surgery will be easier. Had surgery on my neck had 2 discs removed and bone fom hip but would not close until I took Shark Cartilage. Also more of a Vegetarian diet with NO RED MEAT will help also the Rheumatoid . There is no cure but things can be done to make it better-for the Fibermialgera cut way down on caffeine. It must be hard on your Mom because she was so active but you need to remind there are wheelchair athletes and YOU NEED HER-if her dream was to have a son then she must be there for you as long as God has given her time on this earth. Just pray for God to help your Mom cope,to make her and you strong that you can handle anything. Will pray for you and her. Love You can go to wwwushealthnews.com to check out the fibro...and since the need for sleep is not met whih adds to the pain Prosac and Zoloft are suggested for antidepressants. Have your Mom do a search on her conditions and see what help is available on-line. Good Luck
2006-10-09 13:03:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
41 is still a very young age and your mom should have many many years ahead of her. The health problems that she has can definitely slow her down and prevent her from enjoying the things that she used to. One of her biggest hurdles is to deal with the depression. It would be very very good for her to see a doctor to address the depression. Depression is a disease just like any other and when someone is depressed they do not always recognize this. There are medications and therapy that can help. If you think that she is a danger to herself you can call a suicide hotline for her. If your mom or dad has a job with an EAP program please try to get her to use this. This is a Employee Assistance Program. They can help your mom find a doctor or therapist and are completely confidential. Of all the illnesses that you listed Depression can be the most serious and life threatening. I wish you and your mom the very best. She is very very lucky to have you and I bet she knows that.
2006-10-09 12:45:29 · answer #3 · answered by petlover 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm really sorry to hear about your Mother! That's a lot for a 13 year old to deal with!
Every ones situation seems to be different even if they have the same medical problems.
I have known folks in the same boat as your Mother! They made the best of it and lived for a long time. They refused to let it stop them. They still lived their life to the fullest! Yes, it was hard on them!
They also had a very strong belief in God, and this of course helped them! Norma Jones out of Columbus Ohio passed away
about 2-years ago, she was well in to her 60's. A wonderful person!
I guess my point is that life is a gift, a wonderful gift. ANd we should live it, no matter what! My sister and I are, we both can die at any time, you see, we all have our problems. We are the last of 13, We have been dying at all ages, from childhood and up! We have lived with this all our lives!
My prayers are with you and your Mother! Learn to love and live
life with God!
2006-10-09 13:17:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are only 13.
The best thing for you to do to help your mom is take over some chores around the house. Ask her how she's feeling and help her whenever she needs it, even b4 she asks you. Do things like making her some tea, make her a sandwich for lunch or just pour her a nice cold glass of juice. She will appreciate your help and she will know that you care about her health and wellbeing even if you cannot do much else. Leave the rest to the good doctors and pray that she sticks around for your college graduation, your wedding and to see at least one grandchild! Talk to someone in the church and ask for adult help. God bless you and hope everything gets better.
2006-10-09 13:31:25 · answer #5 · answered by SUGA 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does her dr have her on antidepressants? If not, she may need some. If shse doesn't tell her dr that she's depressed, u might need to. Ur mom has a lot of serious health problems, and there isn't much that u can do except be there and be strong because she's going to need it. Don't neglect ur health either. Stress makes us more prone to illness, and u have a lot of things to be stressed about. Make sure that u have someone u can talk to (other than ur mother, it will stress her more to know that she is stressing u).I will pray for u and ur family.
2006-10-09 12:49:40 · answer #6 · answered by dragonkisses 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know, going through something like this is hard, but if you two stick together it will gradually get easier, I am no doctor, so I'm not gonna give any health advice, but maybe you two together could go see a sychiatrist, just to talk and let your feeliings out, remember going to a mental doctor, does not mean you are wacko or crazy (beleive me I used to think so) but it is just a good place to talk, and they will never tell anybody, they will just listen and give good suggestions ,Hope this helps, and I hope your mom and you get better, physically and mentally.
Sincerely,
outdoor_girl93
2006-10-09 12:41:33 · answer #7 · answered by outdoor_girl93 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think your mom is very lucky to still be living at age 41. but i must say with some degree of doubt that she wont be here much longer. i dont say that to run down your hopes, but our bodies can take just so much & then it has to go. your mom & all of us fit this . some of us dont reach that level & are killed before our bodies run down & the batteries go dead. my heart goes out to you & you family, & sorry, i dont have any miracle answeres. my advice is to take one day at a time & prepare yourself for that eventul day. deep down in your heart, you know that this is the best you or anyone in the medical field can do. god bless! rje46805@yahoo.com ps.... stay with her as much as you can & make her comfortable. that will comfort her & do more for her than you will ever realize & your reward is the fact knowing that you loved her to the very end .
2006-10-09 12:52:55 · answer #8 · answered by rje46805 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Pray like you never prayed before. And remember "With God, ALL things are possible". Ask your local church to send out a prayer for your mom. Believe that God will take care of the rest - that's his job.
God Bless you honey and stay strong!
2006-10-09 13:25:18 · answer #9 · answered by my2cents 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You seem to be describing a tumor or perhaps scoliosis with her back.
Right now, you should talk with your guidance counsellor or with some other trusted adult who can see first hand what's going on. And perhaps the doctor can find a treatment for your mom's depression.
Good luck, Honey.
2006-10-09 12:55:22 · answer #10 · answered by Tigger 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋