Hi I need some advice on how to get my mum happy again at Christmas time.I know that me and my brothers are all grown up, but when christmas gets near we all,including my dad get into the christmas spirit and get excited. But my mum seems to dread it. She seems to get down as it reminds her of family that she has lost and she doesnt really seem happy around this time of the year. Through the year she is fine, but i want to know how i can make her happier to realise that we are still her family and are here for her and these are the times we should be making the most of. I can understand as last year we lost our uncle and it was a hard time, but now it seems to have hit her harder than ever. She doesnt really talk about it much to not get upset. I know i cant even imagine how it feels to have lost both parents and a brother. But i dont know what to do as i dont like seeing her down. Any advice would be great.
2006-10-09 09:46:39 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Expectations for Christmas vary from person to person. Sometime all the planning, shopping, lists etc. tend to pile up and as a Mum wanting you all to be happy and doing her best to make it so can be very wearing.
Added to this to no longer have close family members around adds to the pressure as thoughts go into the past and memories come to the fore - some happy some not so happy.
The main thing is to continue to show her love and support and make her aware of how much she means to you all. Try to lift the burden of some of the chores and even when you get the opportunity have a chat on how Christmas can be made easier and better for her. You will know when the time is right to do this - not when she is stressed and worried.
Do hope some of my comments will help.
2006-10-09 09:54:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is difficult for Parents at Christmas especially when the children have grown up, left home, got married or just moved away. Christmas is just not the same, the preparation, the buying of the toys, decorating the Christmas tree, decorating the home all that type of involvement that parents do around that time of the year. I used to love preparing for Christmas with my son, but now he lives and works in England, while I live and work in France, but I still have a little work to do as he comes to me for Christmas. Your mother recently lost a brother and depending how close they were it would have been difficult. For many parents Christmas is not the same, but as their children you can still bring back that Christmas spirit by going round a few days before and all join in decoration the house, the tree and the preparation of the Christmas meal. Mum may beging to feel better knowing that her children are still the little children she once ad hat home many years ago. Good luck WB
2006-10-09 17:45:26 · answer #2 · answered by David Wilson 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing I would suggest, is, to do something totally different at Christmas. If you would normally have a family time at home, go to a restaurant and have Christmas dinner that she doesn't have to think about. Good luck!
2006-10-09 16:52:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be thoughtful. Tell her how much you love her. Help out where you can. Joke around - get her to laugh. Do something spontaneous and fun... play a silly game or, hell, drag her butt out caroling. Respect her space and how she feels this time of year, but do what you can to make sure she isnt' able to completely shut things out. She'll be going through a tough time, but just being there and caring, and letting her know it, will bring her spirits up.
2006-10-09 16:54:56 · answer #4 · answered by The Cuke 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All get together and spoil her rotten! do the cooking get her shopping ..take the stress out of it all for her and try to have a laugh...if shes feeling like shes lost her children remind her shes gained some great new Friends.
2006-10-09 16:51:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a time evry year when you can sit down and remember all the departed. Talk about the time your Uncle did things with you, or anyone else who has passed on.
2006-10-09 17:13:51 · answer #6 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like Mom is having problems with depression, try to talk with your Dad and see if you can get her to go to the Doctor. Depression can ruin your life, it isn't something that a person can control on their own.
2006-10-09 17:02:35 · answer #7 · answered by kayboff 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get all the family to put pictures of each other all over the house so she can see how special you are she will be so happy
2006-10-09 16:48:38 · answer #8 · answered by MelWolf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋