I have been with boyfriend for two and a half years now, we have two beautiful little girls. At first everything was good with my first daughter and we were even talking about marriage. But, I got pregnant a year later with my second daughter and things changed. We started arguing to the point where we were fighting and police were involved 4 times. But, we still are together. My boyfriend is 5 years older than me. And I am afraid I will lose him if I don't grow up soon. I know I am still immature and that is because I had my first child at 20 and I didn't get a chance to experience things like I should now I don't have any female friends I can talk to. Because, I had kids and now all I do is stay home with my family. He says I am holding him down, cause when he goes over his friends house I get upset cause I am home with the kids and now I have very low self esteem. When we are out and I see someone who is pretty I am afraid he is looking at her. And my jealousy makes him mad. What ca
2006-10-09 05:13:55 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
STOP THE WHINING AND NAGGING ALSO>>Boring uneventful sex, not getting enough Oral, Anal etc, wanting to try Outdoor, Water Sports and Group sex ..even dogging and BDSM and all the time stuck with a woman who will not experiment. It is a FACT that most men lose interest when the partner stops trying to please him. And then ...wILL look for someone who will
please ignore all the fat/plain/boring/puritan/ugly/religious nutters who post on here...
2006-10-09 05:16:25 · answer #1 · answered by JoyDivision 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well I can tell you this much: men hate to be nagged, especially over little things. That will definetly drive him away. If you want to shock him is to handle it without the yelling.. Then they get scared because they don't know what your thinking or what you're gonna do. That works on my baby daddy all the time.. He'll try to argue on the phone, and I diffuse it by hanging up on his *** and then he'll calm his *** down. Or else I'll laugh at the sh*t he be saying to me. But what's most important is the children and what's best for them. And having kids is no guarantee of a man staying with you bottom line. And regardless how how much a man takes care of you it's still on YOU as far as the children. I think it's messed up but that's the way it works. But don't be one of those women that uses the children as a pawn to manipulate the situation. Men come and go and you still need to do what you gotta do. And the arguing ain't good to do around the children. You might need some space to breathe and figure some things out. Because a lot of that stuff you going through you are going to have to get over it one way or the other because if you don't, he either gonna cheat or leave. But be the bigger person and don't get into it to the point the police gotta be called because you don't want it to escalate and it's gonna be him, you, or both of you in that squad car, and where the kids gonna be? Social Services. So you need to think about when you do certain things how is that gonna affect your kids....
2006-10-09 12:29:46 · answer #2 · answered by Dr. PHILlis (in training) 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I know exactly where you are coming from as I was in a identical situation. Slowly the relationship turned abusive and I had to leave him. I took my kids and started a new life. Yes you may be immature but he knew this from the begining and shame on him for leaving you at home all the time, Sounds like he may be overwhelmed. But that is too too bad, You need to take the kids to the sitters and go find yourself, I mean go make some friends, do something for yourself that will make you feel good. Maturity does not happen over night, it happens with experience and time.
and if he is not loving, patient and kind then you may need to seek counsiling or something. Next time he goes to his friends house go with him.. You guys are supposed to be a team..
good luck sweety..
2006-10-09 12:22:00 · answer #3 · answered by sissybombay 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are having fights where the police are involved this is not good for your children. Has he ever given you a reason to not trust him? If he is allowed to go with his friends , why don't you go out and visit your friends or make friends. Men always look at other women, its normal ,but its the way they do it. Some men show little respect to the women they are with when they do that.
2006-10-09 12:26:00 · answer #4 · answered by perrisgal 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like you are being held hostage by your low self esteem (and holding him down, too). Maybe you could find a support group or play group for your girls and meet some other young mothers? I understand that your fmaily is your priority, but you can't take care of them if you don't take care of yourself and your personal (and psychological) needs as well. If all of your focus is on him, then he is going to feel smothered. If you take some back for yourself, his mind will change... i promise. Put the focus on yourself, and you will become more attractive to him (not that you arent already, but this works).
Humans are social beings.... we need friends, but first and foremost, we need to be our own best friend. Think about your relationship with yourself, and all else will fall into place.
2006-10-09 12:24:45 · answer #5 · answered by JESSICA S 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All i can say is if u need to talk im here
contact me by messenger. We'll talk more about the subject ok
2006-10-09 12:22:10 · answer #6 · answered by Twilight 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
u can make a new look to u to let him to break the routin then if u have to be outside with him then y u dont get a babyseter
2006-10-09 12:21:28 · answer #7 · answered by adamsmith200681 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He will leave if he wants to, regardless of what you do or dont do.
2006-10-09 12:16:37 · answer #8 · answered by Sticky 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋