Ok this is my story this guy ive been dating now for 5weeks is really into me hes a hood cat and uim a good girl so im kinda hiding this realtionship from my folks.Anyways a good friend of his who also happens to like me said that if I dont sleep with my bf that he will break up with me and my bf said also that if nothing sexual happens between us its no use going out with her!!!!!!
Im not vain no far from it but ppl do consider me as being 'hot' so is my bf using me?He sats he loves me and doesnt want to loose me and he even told his closest friend that hes afraid it breaks between us so does he really love me or does he love me and is afraid that he'll lose me meaning:He wouldnt get a chance to sleep with me?? Help me pls understand 10 points for the most accurate direcr answer thanks!!!Also today I broke up with him telling him i never want to see him again was I wrong ??I wrote it in a letter and hell get it to night while he at boxing 6h....Its the only way cause i cant no more!!
2006-10-09 04:26:46 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
OK let me try to get this straight. Your boyfriend said that if you do not sleep together, he is not going to continue dating you? If your boyfriend really loves you, he would not want to quit seeing you if u don't sleep together. I can't tell you how to live your life, but if the only reason he is with you is to sleep with you, then that is not the kind of relationship you want. A good relationship is stable, one with trust and communication. I would honestly talk to your boyfriend about what he said, and ask him is the only reason he is with you is for that. If so, then I think you should forget about him because if you are not into that, but he is, later on it could start pressuring you and you might get hurt over something like that. So talk to him or his friend and find out the real truth. Good luck!
2006-10-09 04:34:23 · answer #1 · answered by ♥#1 Miley Cyrus Fan♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your first problem is that you find it difficult to establish confidence in your parents who have been your stability for how long you have been alive,this raises the question of you leaving yourself open for abuse of all sorts and also being young and not so experienced you may not know how to handle the situations as they come .First ,you should not be forced to have sex with anyone if you do not want to.peer pressure is what get many young and innocent ladies pregnant and even worse jeopardizing their futures for a fleeting loser,confront your boyfriend and straighten out your situations so that you can normalize your life and have a relationship on your terms,not theirs,good luck.
2006-10-09 11:52:18 · answer #2 · answered by delmy d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dignity, love, trust and self-respect come from within---always remember that.
Stand your ground for a good and decent relationship. That is the thing lacking in SO many couples that break up---one or the other looses their own respect for self, is insecure, thinks that DOING things (like putting out) is what will 'keep' some one loving you.
The truth is that your own self-image, confidence and self-worth, combine with those of a good and decent MAN----to form a relationship. Good honest positive communication helps.
Ya know when you are with someone that is SO sweet good and special.... and they care about YOU, 'cause of who you are, not for what you can do for them.
I know its a streatch.... but "IF" this bf is a MAN, and can truely LOVE you by accepting you for who you are, through his own acceptance of who HE is----without the meddling of his so-called, um, 'friends'...... then you know you've got a keeper.
Love works when its given by choice---same for sex. Oh, you can 'love' someone but that fades over time when its not real, not in the right context. Same for sex.... you can put out anytime, and in that moment it might feel really good. Yet where is your self-respect afterwards?
Have relationships with family, friends, peers and BF's that are decent, honest, upstanding and something you are PROUD of---all parts.
Cause what you do today, you GET to live with. Love yourself, girl for the sweet and bright woman you are. Then you'll see the genuine love FOR you when you get it, 'cause it'll look familiar.
Hope you do well, and find the pride and joy in yourself---you deserve it!
2006-10-09 11:38:10 · answer #3 · answered by megettingbetter 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off you did the right thing breaking up with him. he sounds like a loser. No guy should give you a sexual ultimatum in a relationship. I would recommend watching your back for a few weeks though. Stay near friends at school and don't get caught alone with him for awhile he sounds like a bit of a thug to me just be careful and stick to your decision. Good Luck
2006-10-09 11:31:40 · answer #4 · answered by Beeper 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well done! He was obviously using your feelings to get you! Many guys are like him. Impatient & with one thing in their minds only: sex. Being with him for 5 weeks is not enough time to know if you really like him & if you want your relationship with him to become more intimate. Especially if, as I assume, you are a teenager, when it is too early to start sexual relationships anyway. So, find another boyfriend that will not be as demanding and will give you time & space to grow up, to make up your mind, mature both physically & mentally, and most of all a man who will respect you. But to find a guy who respects you need to respect yourself. You have to know that being young & hot is a ticket with many destinations, choose yours carefully. Do yourself a favor & concentrate to your school, it was very difficult to understand what you wrote.
2006-10-09 11:57:42 · answer #5 · answered by marissa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend is using you! You should never sleep with someone because they'll break up with you if you don't. You were right to break up with him and you should give it two days, if not by the end of the day. He'll come crawling back to you. I'm sure you are a beautiful girl and you deserve to be treated much better than that. A guy should be falling over himself to be with you.
2006-10-09 11:30:51 · answer #6 · answered by KK M 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first of all, you gotta stand up for yourself. tell him straight up that you don't want to sleep with him, and if that's all this relationship means to him then that means he doesn't really love you anyway. be firm about it...if he loves you as much as he says, he'll understand. tell him you're not ready yet...i don't know how long you two have been seeing each other, but if you still feel uncomfortable at the thought of sleeping with him then just don't do it. i think you should have asked us what to do before you broke up with him, but anyway...see how he reacts after getting the letter, and if he seems totally apologetic and understands that he shouldn't pressure you into having sex with him, then do give him another chance.
good luck~
2006-10-09 11:36:24 · answer #7 · answered by annie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well i think you should talk to him, tell him what you just told me, or ask him why are you going to break up with me just because i won't have sex with you, then the truth should start to come out, and if it don't then you should leave him bc MAYBE he is using you. I think you have waited a little longer b4 u sent him the break up letter, i think you should make/base ur decision on the answer if you ask him the question i told u 2 ask him. I hope everything goes well
2006-10-09 11:36:17 · answer #8 · answered by xxMiizzCxx 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if you broke up with him, then why are you asking us this question? I see that you broke up with him on paper, but why not tell him in person? You can tell a person something and mean it a lot better in person than on paper cause if that person does not want to read it, then all they have to do is throw it away, but if you are right in front of them, they can't just walk off without you coming behind them. Handle your business girl, and good luck in whateva you choose.
2006-10-09 11:36:26 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey you have a right- a right to be treated with respect. NEVER let a guy use you. If it's purely physical that's it- there's no compassion, love, trust and understanding. Until you get in bed.
Sure you may be pretty, and you may want a cute boyfriend but never let a guy use you- you're worth more.
2006-10-09 11:31:22 · answer #10 · answered by x_Super_Social_Superstar_x 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋