My Stepson's memory is terrible.......?

Question

He's 9 years old, and anything you ask him to do, unless you chase behind him, he forgets and ends up wandering off doing something else.......ie: get dressed, clean your teeth, wash yourself in the bath.......

Though this is never the case when it comes to playing computer games/playstation etc. amazingly enough.......

I find I have to tell him the exactly the same things every day, it gets on my nerves and I know it gets on his..........

Any ideas??

Answer 1

First, write down his schedule. Sit with the child and review what he needs to do daily: Time for bath, homework time, down time. Have him tell you if there is anything else that needs to go on the list: Baseball practice, after school club, etc.

Post it in his room and one in yours. At whatever time go to him and tell him to check the list. (Even better if Dad does this.) Ask him what he is supposed to be doing. Wait for a response. He'll say, "It says I need to take a shower now." Say, "OK, do that."

Using a list takes the "I told you to..." out of the conversation. It makes the list the authority. Eventually he should learn to go to the list for reference.

Have the school guidance conselor spend a few sessions with him. Give her the list and ask them to help to reinforce some independent motivation on his part. He may need to hear it from a neutral third party.Ask them to keep in touch with you about how he keeps up with his homework.

Look into the after school program. Most offer academic support from 3 to 4. Have him enroll. He can come home after academic support, but he has to have his homework done.

You are laying a foundation for basic acceptance of responsibility. Where you succeed now will determine how much you will have to keep on him later, when it really starts to get tough.

Have a chat with dad. Have him back you and his son up. See if he can't find a regular time where it is just he and the son, even if it's just an hour tossing frisbee on Saturdays. This keeps the son's self esteem up.

I wish you luck. Do take your authority out of the loop and expect him to self motivate. He's little, so be gentle. Tell him this is how a man takes care of himself. Tell him the good things you see in him and that he is growing up to be a good man. God bless you for making the effort.

Answer 2

It's not just your stepson. My 14 year old is capable of the same memory loss when it comes to doing something undesirable as well as my other children. Sometimes compromising works best. We usually have alot of chores on weekends. One day will be a day of "do what you want" & the next day will be a day of "do what Mom says." This actually works best for my kids. There are little work charts you could get & let him put a sticker for each chore each day. He may think the stickers fun & you may not feel the need to constantly remind. Good Luck & you are not alone.

Answer 3

Get him a journal for his daily duties= check out flylady.com
she has great stuff= and the journal is great= It sounds like he lives with you- so- check out = he can do his chores first= get into a routine = then he can play= also = consider what he has lost -he may be really stressed and that doesn't help- D

Answer 4

Sounds very much like ADD or ADHD you should have him tested for this. There are a variety of treatments for this problem, I believe you should try all the non-medicinal ones first then if you cannot find one that works well there is always the medical choices.

Answer 5

when i was that age it was becase i was being told what to do. Try incentivising the chores, and i bet you he will remember then!

maybe with a small amount of pocket money, ir banning him from his pc unless he does them

*note to your step son, sorry

Answer 6

me 2

Answer 7

normal, has other things on his mind (computer games/video games)