why is it that you should have to ask for help why don't people just offer to help?

Question

is laziness just a way of life for some people

Answer 1

I don't know if it has to do with the times we are living in or that the places I've lived that makes the difference.

When I was very small we lived in Santa Cruz, CA. This was in the '70's and people there were pretty laid-back and hippie and it just seemed like everyone was real friendly and helped each other out. Then we moved to the mid-west where i spent most of my childhood, and except for a few instances of small-mindedness, the people they were also very neighbourly, friendly and helpful.
No one waited for you to ask for help, they just helped.

As an adult I've lived in a few big cities and it seems that it's all "Me first!" Some people will step over you even if they see you struggling and not even notice.

Over the summer I saw a car pulled off to the side of the road. When I drove passed I noticed there was a young family with a baby and they appeared to be having car trouble. When I drove passed them 10 minutes later I stopped and asked if they needed help. They were so shocked and surprised that I had stopped. I don't think I came off as menacing to them because I'm pretty petite and I think they thought they would be a bother. They said someone was on the way to pick them up so I took them for their word, but asked if they needed anything (water, shade) for the baby.

I don't understand what is so hard about noticing the people around you?

Answer 2

People can be lazy. However, people are oft times afraid that if they volunteer to help, they will be expected, I said expected to help whenever anyone asks. I've seen this too often.

Also, people have their own agendas. Some are tied, ill, have injuries, have personal problems, little time and money.

One thing for sure: If the cause is worthy, and you ask for help, some will do it as an act of kindness and support. Others will be annoyed. There is no rhyme or reason about people's patterns receipt to say that unless you ask, people won't often volunteer.

Answer 3

Because the world is one big rat-race! People are so involved with their lives and their problems. People see the problems, but if it is going to cost them anything, then they put their blinkers back on. It is no so much laziness as most probably fear that they are going to be ripped off. Some people play that game especially, for their own gains.

I suppose it depends on where you live..in a city you are anonym anyway and if you live rurally..then it is like living in an old womens gossip café!

Why are there so many hermits?

Answer 4

I always try and help family and friends when I can but I usually wait to be asked incase they think I'm interfering or sticking my nose in where it's not wanted. With certain members of my family it's a bit different if I see they are needing help I always offer and they do the same to me - sometimes. Sometimes people are so good at hiding the fact that they need help and others just struggle in silence.

Answer 5

You see someone sitting on a park bench. What do you do?
They could be waiting for someone or just enjoying the view.
They could be suicidal or abused and thrown out of home.

Do I approach everyone I see, and offer to help?

If I see something where someone MIGHT need help, I sometimes find a seat nearby. You'll be amazed at how may domestic arguments or crying women are ended happily without interference. In fact my presence would have made it worse.

But most of us do still live in a society where help is freely given if it is definitely needed.

Answer 6

Many people feel if they offer help that the person they are over stepping their boundaries of personal communication. As well as many of us have learned by being refuted time and time again when we offered help that it may be better to just wait until someone asks for it.
unfortunately you might find yourself hanging off a ladder one day while your neighbors just stand around and watch....until you say the magic words 'help' then they will scold you about being on the ladder in the first place- such is life: )

Answer 7

They are so wrapped up in their own selfish shallow life's they don't see anything but themselves, people have no thought or manners these days and would rather just by pass you than help you out, thing is those sort are the first to scream and shout if you do the self same thing to them, it costs nothing to help and we can all spare a few minuets of our time for others, just wish the selfish shallow ones would stop and see how easy it is to give a little bit of their help and time to others.

Answer 8

I think that people are afraid to offer help, often they get real abuse, which is sad. Now we're made to worry so much about things we can do so little about in the world (on TV etc.) we feel helpless and have lost the spirit of community where we help each other. I put the blame at the door of globalism.

Answer 9

Sometimes people don't even know that you need help. My experience is that when someone obviously needs help people usually offer to help. It's when there is doubt or when people have no idea you need help that they don't usually offer it. I guess people just feel like they'd be bothering people if they always offered help without knowing if it was even needed. People just expect that if someone is in need of help they will ask for it.

Answer 10

Who is lazy; who is too lazy to do the job and to ask for help or who is lazy to offer help? It seems both are lazy!