And worse they dont even realize how they hurt me, don't care or make any apologies and blames all their mistreatment of me on me. And it was over quite a long period of time and now I'm free how do I stop myself from being so intensely angry. I just want to get over it but it's hard. All I went is for them to feel sorry but that will never happen.
2006-10-08 15:44:00 · 16 answers · asked by BereaGirl 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Accept the fact that you can't control other people. You can't force anyone to feel the way you want them to.
Allow yourself to be angry. It's natural. If you release your negative emotions, they will eventually subside.
Ask yourself: Does my anger hurt this other person who wronged me, or am I only hurting myself?
Remember the cliche, "The best revenge is living well."
2006-10-08 15:52:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Go for a walk, the gym, visit sick children in the hospital or nursing home, post a question on Yahooooooo! Have a Dr. Pepper and a Twinkie. Watch some cable or browse Ebay. The first thing is to do "something else". When your ears quit burning remember what you have between them. A hot brain. Cool off a bit and whatever is upsetting you take a good look at it. If someone is criticizing you take an honest look at yourself. In alot of cases they will eventually come across as right. People usually tell you something because they care even though they might come across mad because they have held it in and it explodes. If they are just ******* get a third opinion to see if maybe they got you mad over a legitimate reason. Anger is not bad or abnormal. What you do with that anger is what is important. Do something constructive with your anger. Like basketball, tennis, jogging, housework, studying, knitting, etc. Make me some socks while you're at it.
2006-10-08 16:03:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you are religious, I would pray often about it and ask God to free you of all the negative emotions that this has given you.
One good thing, although it seems really whack, is to forgive the person. You don't have to let them know, but do it for yourself.
Because you have to realize: You have to be a relatively sane and grounded person to not treat other people like ****.
But not everyone is like that. Especially the person that hurt you.
They are mentally & emotionally hurting... or unstable or miserable... or were abused somewhere along the way.
People don't just treat other people like ****, there is a past experience behind it.
So whoever did this to you, is hurting alot more and is more messed up in the head.
So forgive them for what they did. They are hurting more than you. You will get over it, move on, and be better for it.
They can't for some reason. And that's why they continue to hurt people like you and others.
When you finally forgive the person that hurt you, your quality of life is going to improve back to what it was before.
But this person, until they actively take a stand in their life, will continue to be miserable and hurt and use other people.
They're whack in the head, moreso than you can understand.
So let it go. And forgive them because they just can't understand.
This will be the best thing to heal you.
And next time, don't jump into relationships. Anyone unknown should not be given trust that can eventually hurt you so quickly. Spend your time learning to recognize people like these.
And don't become a hermit. Just be responsible for yourself and no one else. Trust people, but don't put those people in a category of being given too much trust too quickly.
Take care!
And God Bless You!
2006-10-08 16:02:47 · answer #3 · answered by the nothing 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
That happened to me yesterday, long story but same idea, treated bad, made to feel like sh*t. and the person didn't care, seemed to enjoy it.
I went outside, said what I would have in person, but didn't, (that never gets you anywhere), That just seems to make matters worse. I felt better, and today I know that other person is a sh*t ball, and I don't care anymore.
I didn't do anything that I cant take back. They are miserable and I am not.
So I just keep looking for kind good loving people to be with. Take care and don't let anyone get to you. You have the power! See ya Dave
2006-10-08 15:59:05 · answer #4 · answered by duster360 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about them...Karma is a boomerang, it'll come back and smack you in the @ss! But as far as anger...the oriental have a room where you can go and break dishes. You put on safety goggles and smash away. You could also get a membership somewhere and start working off the anger. Just get an MP3 player, put on some good tunes and run or work off the anger. You look better (which will work for the next time they see what they lost) and you aren't in jail for breaking someones nose or property! Good luck and know you will be better off soon! :)
2006-10-08 15:56:04 · answer #5 · answered by sixfoot8bkr 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't expect someone to feel sorry if they do not realize they have done anything wrong. Also, don't expect to teach them what they have done wrong. Feel free to be angry for a bit and then try to forgive. Realize it is not you it is the person's nature. Just like an animal that bites, it is their nature. Remember forgiveness does not happen immediately. It is a process. Allow yourself the time to get through the process. Sounds like you are already on your way.
2006-10-08 15:53:40 · answer #6 · answered by Mos 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Realize they are renting space in your head. They probably don't even have you on their mind. Try to realize they were in your life for a reason, maybe one you will never know, and learn something from it. What difference does it really make if they apologize? What's done is done. Let it go.
2006-10-08 16:13:42 · answer #7 · answered by bleunumen 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, you can't make someone be sorry, so you'll just have to find a way to let it go.... first of all, be happy that you do not have to put up with this person's abuse anymore.... second, write a letter to this person descibing all the ways they hurt you and how it made you feel... whether you send it or not is up to you, but writing everything down can be very therapeutic and could be just what you need to start letting your anger go
2006-10-08 15:55:01 · answer #8 · answered by Stephanie73 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you would be best off if you got some counseling. Then know that your anger will subside with time. But for the present, if you have any contact with this person, let them know what they have done, disconnect from them and then work hard on bettering yourself.
2006-10-08 15:53:37 · answer #9 · answered by luveeduvee 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If they don't know they hurt your feelings, how can they apologize.
Write them a letter, put it in a drawer for a week, read it again. Then you have two choices, tear it up and as you do think about letting go of the anger. Or, send it to them and wait and see what happens.
2006-10-08 15:50:22 · answer #10 · answered by banananose_89117 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋