my hubby is a musician and all he thinks about is his band and music. i have to actually work and support my 2 kids. i tried telling him nicely to go get another job and he gets pissed at me. he works only on weekends for 100 bucks, thats like 600 a month. i have been married for a year. Known him for 3 years. Back then he wasnt like that. His a really nice guy its just his music and his band.
2006-10-08 08:52:49 · 10 answers · asked by FHHN 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If he thinks he's making a living with his music, he's wrong. He may not want to admit it, but not many people can make a living by being a musician. I know you don't want to hurt his feelings, but he needs to get it through his head that he cannot support a family of 4 on $100 a week. His music is a HOBBY, not a job. Tell him you understand that his music is important to him and that you have no objection to his playing in his band on the weekend, but he's married with a family now and needs to get a real job. Don't worry about hurting his feelings, he needs to hear it. Good luck to you.
2006-10-08 09:10:17 · answer #1 · answered by Patricia S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married a struggling musician which means you married a man that you will have to support for as long as you are married. He cannot support himself, so how did you ever expect him to be able to support you or his own kids. If he had any intention of getting a job, he would have done so as soon as he found out that you were pregnant. This is what a real man does. Face it, you are a single parent. You should have a plan in place so that when he walks out you won't be left with nothing. Get a college degree, a good job and your own bank account. Good luck.
2006-10-08 16:00:29 · answer #2 · answered by mad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the last person I knew that married a guy like that got divorced. He refused and left all the money earning up to her. Sounds just like your situation. So I guess what I'm saying there is no nice way... tell him like it is.... it's either a job or a goodbye.
What were you thinking not talking this out in advance?
2006-10-08 16:09:17 · answer #3 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he has kids and a wife.he cant put all his effort in his band when theres food to be put on the table and money needed.
tell him that u cant support him,urself,and the kids all by urself,and that ur gonna need help.if he wont go get a job,then tell him that u just cant handle all of it urself,and that u want him to be happy with his band,but that the band isnt paying much,and that hell need a better job before he can help support the family.
2006-10-08 16:08:16 · answer #4 · answered by Abby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you have to look after you and your kids and can not support him any more , if he is not going to contribute, maybe he needs to go and live with his band and they will support Him , also do not worry about hurting his feelings he sure in hell is not the least bit concerned abou you t and the children, if necessary put the player to the curb
2006-10-08 15:57:42 · answer #5 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe get him to teach music on weekdays, something that related to music still can make a living, at least some more money, try suggesting to him that usiung his music knowledge, he can nurture kids in music schools.
A subtle way to ask him to get a job, how abt that?
2006-10-08 21:23:00 · answer #6 · answered by Rootbeer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about his feelings. He has a family to support, and that obligation should mean more than his music. Tell him to get a job!
2006-10-08 15:56:14 · answer #7 · answered by GreenEyedSista 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes it is ok to hurt their feelings. Is he taking into account that maybe he is hurting your feelings by not working? Come on you both have a responsibilty, and that is the kids, bills and each other.
2006-10-08 16:39:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move to your parents and let him stay alone in the house, see if he changes his view.
2006-10-09 04:09:44 · answer #9 · answered by axix 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he is lazy a job would hurt his feelings
2006-10-08 16:02:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋