Do you believe people can change for someone?

Question

I don't believe that...

They can for a short period of time... but if they don't realize it themselves that they need to change (and it's coming from the conscience) they won't change, they will revert back to who they are before...

How about you?
What do you think (from your experience)?

Can people change permanently for someone without self realization?

Some people just don't learn from their past mistakes...

May not be worth it for me to go after them anyway...

Thanks for all of your great answers!!!

Answer 1

No, I don't believe that people change drastically. People may change their point of view a little bit however they won't change if they won't believe that they need to change themselves. One example is a guy who's not really good to his girlfirend/wife/partner/etc. (sorry, I don't mean to pick on guys ...it could be the other way around as well but since I started with that example let me stick to it). Check out this scenario: let's say that this guy is cheating on his girlfriend and the girl finds out and says to him she's gonna leave him if he doesn't change. He promises he's gonna change his ways and she belives him. He may be faithful to her for a while... until he feels secure enough that she's not gonna leave him. He'll go back to his old ways eventually. Of all those guys who cheated a very small percentage of guys will not want to cheat again. Therefore there's a lot of truth in the saying: once a cheater always a cheater. Those who don't cheat again? ....the reason may be that they're afraid of loosing their partner ...but not because they don't want to cheat (from within , from their conscience). So, I don't believe that people change ...oh, just like that... Something dramatic has to happen for a person to see clearly that they're wrong and need to change themselves. I know that it may seem like I don't have a lot of faith in people but that's pretty much what I've seen from my own experience.

Answer 2

You can quit a bad habit like smoking. And that could mean the world to someone. I stopped leaving the top up and my girlfriend´s yelling went down 30%. So yea there are some things you can change for someone. But some changes occur only by self realization. Say like snapping out of one´s laziness.Or cutting down on the gambling because of what your bank account and credit reflect. Short term changes I think occur when the person expects and or is offered an immediate reward. Or suddenly finds him or herself in a strongly supervised environment ,so he or she inhibits a behavior and therefor appear changed for a short time.

Answer 3

NOPE!! I was married for 5 yrs and during that time my ex husband had a lot of things he had to "work" on i guess you could say. He would change or appear to change but no more than 6 months after thinking he has he had always gone back to the same ole crap.

I have just learned that people never change. They are who they are and If you can't get past the smallest thing that you dislike then move on because they won't change or keep the change.

Answer 4

People change when they are with people they love .. but if you mean .. like can a guy that is a bully .. and an abuser or a drunk change his ways because he meets the right woman ? No .. that is too big a part of who he is .. he can't change that much. But, little changes happen when you spend a lot of time with someone .. usually for the positive. Things unspoken , you just start to notice it. Good Luck! :)

Answer 5

Hi Jimmy,

I think a person can certainly change superficial aspects of themselves for someone else (i.e., hair color, clothing style, etc.) if they are motivated to do so. However, I don't believe anyone could or should attempt to change deeper personal aspects of themselves for another person, as the change won't be permanent and will upset the one who is doing the changing as he/she will feel false and dishonest and will upset the one he/she is changing for, as he/she will ultimately feel duped by the other's dishonesty.

Answer 6

I think they can. This goes along with being influenced by others. It also depends on the person. If they are stubborn or very protective of themselves they probably won't change. If they are willing to, then I think they can. Everyone is different.

Answer 7

Yes, people can change in in more ways than one. Just make sure that those changes are for the persons best.

Answer 8

I believe people can change for some one. On of my worst enemy's became my best friend because when she was sad one time I helped her out even through I didn't like her. She thought that was so nice, and didn't understand why I would do that for her when we were enemy's so she decided to be more nicer to people after that like me. And now she's really cool and one of my best friends

Answer 9

I beleive that you can, but if it's for the person you like or love, you shouldn't. They should like you for who you are in every way. If theres something that they don't like they will learn to live with it. But I can say this I wouldn't change for anybody they should like me the way that I am, and if they can't then just get lost I don't want anything to do with them.

Answer 10

I don't think people can change their "core" personality for someone else. I think they can compromise, though. For instance, I like to drink alcohol. My husband does not. So, I compromised and stopped. And that's just me. He compromised for me by learning to communicate better. I'm a talker and he wasn't. But he's trying and managing quite well. So, it goes both ways.