This relationship is about 3 mths old and I was insanely into him during our dating period. I was drawn to him becos I thought he surprises me with his difference. After we entered into a relationship, our difference turned into a topic that could possibly lead us to a break up. Our perceptions and our ways of handling matters.. Everything just crashed. He doesn't trust me when I'm out with friends and its becoz of how I behaved which I never thought would upset him. And times, he hurt me without knowing. We have yet to have any definite intentions to end this relationship however, I wonder how I can still make this relationship work with trust and have him to be more sensitive towards my feelings. I have tried to talk about it and so far, its been really unsuccessful communicating with the opposite.
I miss the lovey-dovey moment before we were an item, really do.
2006-10-08 03:24:36 · 6 answers · asked by Laetishaa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ok everything you have said i have gone through. my girlfriend and i are complete opposites. food, sports teams, interests, everything. to be honest with you we have had lots of problems in the past. now i'm paying off a $3000+ engagement ring. here's the things that worked for us.
1. Communication is the most important, if we didn't talk about everything we wouldn't be where we're at.
2. flexibility: being opposites you need to do things you like and vice versa. you both have to be happy doing activities socially. if i keep doing the things she likes it gets boring after a while.
3. honesty: i have given her my complete honesty and she has done the same for me. this gives them there space and doesn't seem like that you are restricting them.
you wont go through the puppy love again that is finished but that doesn't mean you can't still be happy. talk to the person be completely honest. if you can't do that then it's not worth being with them. without trust and honesty it's not worth being in a relationship with that person.
good luck and i hope at least some of that helps you.
best wishes from michael.
2006-10-08 04:20:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Opposites can attract! My husband and I have been together almost 10 years and we are complete opposites! It works for us. We balance each other out. I would not want someone exactly like me.
He's a dreamer I'm a doer. He's impulsive, I think things through (sometimes to much). He had a dream of owning his own business, he had that dream since he was young. To him it was just a dream. I made it happen.
As far as the "lovey-dovey" moments before you met...
1. It is never going to have that thrill of getting to know each other again.
2. That doesn't mean it can't be exciting and passionate. That is something a relationship can always have and definitely needs.
3. After the butterflies wear off and the mystery of each other is no longer a mystery, passion takes thought and energy.
As far as the trust issue....if you don't have trust in a relationship you don't have anything.
2006-10-08 10:44:21 · answer #2 · answered by mommy of two! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guys should really sit down and talk about this! It's a hard time for you and him also! It's good to be different but i think in your case you guys are too different. You need to be able to come together and agree on somethings! Take some time out for him! Do things he likes to do and see how it goes! Then in return have him do things with you! In the beginning of most relationships it feels great because it's new but Don't loose that "newness". I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half now. We do the same things we did when we first got together. We still think it's fun but we try something different that he may like or i may like! It keeps the relationship flowing! There's always a surprise with him or me! So try new things, try some old things! just try to make it work and if it doesn't work then you need to break up! Sorry but thats the way it works sometimes!
2006-10-08 10:39:36 · answer #3 · answered by Black Betty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is not treating you with respect and isn't understanding of your feelings, it may be time to move on instead of wasting your time in a relationship that isn't really satisfying your emotional needs. Trust is necessary for a good relationship. The fact that you are opposites could be good or bad it depends on how much each person involved is willing to give and compromise. It sounds like he's not willing to put as much effort into you as you are into him. There is someone out there who will be more thoughtful of your feelings and put more effort into having a good relationship. I think it's better to be alone than to feel lonely in a bad relationship.
2006-10-08 10:39:18 · answer #4 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then you get back into the lovey-dovey stuff and he will follow!!!!
2006-10-08 10:27:23 · answer #5 · answered by mustanglady 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to have a heart to heart and iron out all your problems.
2006-10-08 10:27:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋