My son is a good child but sometimes he will be a two year old and dump his crayons out onto the floor and refuse to pick them up or he will cry when he doesn't get his way. I have tried re-directing and that works good for when he doesn't get his way but when it comes to him not picking up toys or telling me no and his favorite word now is "shut up", I don't know what to do. If I smack him on the hand or leg or even spank him he just laughs at me and runs off giggling like it is a game. My husband isn't much help in disciplining our son unless it is affecting him somehow. Such as if our son gets into his books. In fact my husband was the one who taught him to say shut up. At at my wits end with this, does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle this before it is too late?
2006-10-08 01:41:28 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
KeKe, That is a great idea about taking my husbands books away. I love it!
2006-10-08 01:54:00 · update #1
I would take his crayons or any toys he won't pick up and put them into a "no playing" box, so every time he refuses to pick up his toys, he will have less and less to play with. Eventually, he'll get it.
As for the "shut up" and "no," I would first tell him that those are not appropriate (or whatever he will understand), then each time he uses them, take away another toy/activity he loves.
As far as the crying when he doesn't get his way, ignore it. He's doing it so that you'll cave. You are an adult, and you know why he's doing this. He's not hurt, he's not hungry, let him cry. He will eventually realize that this won't work with you. Do NOT let him control you this way, or it will get out of hand.
Now, as for your husband...sounds like he needs to grow up just a bit. Try taking away HIS books when he teaches inappropriate vocabulary to a child.
2006-10-08 01:49:36 · answer #1 · answered by Katyana 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is going to sound mean, but if he cannot take care of his crayons (or whatever else he dumps and refuses to pick up), take them away from him for a bit. Tell him that he can have them back when he can pick them up like a big boy. When you smack them or hit them for something like that, they just learn to be afraid of mommy and daddy instead of learning why what they did was wrong. The only time you should really hit them is if they are going to do something that will hurt them so they assosiate discomfort with things that will actually hurt them (like touching a hot stove or running out into the street).
2006-10-08 01:46:21 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Smacking, yelling and negative criticizm all turn children into angry, defiant little people. It shapes who they are. You have to be a role model and don't do these things in your home. Hitting only teaches that it is okay. Buy some books on discipline and work out a plan. You and your husband should read it together.
2006-10-08 03:49:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried 'time- out'? I personally do not like hitting children, I think it is degrading and unnecessary. I've got 3 kids between the ages of 10 months and 7 years. I have always put them in 'time- out' and they hate it because they have to just sit in a room and do nothing. I also agree with taking the crayons away. Pretend you are going to throw them away and explain that if he does not look after his toys and put them away after play, then you have to throw them away. Good luck and remember he is just a kid and they will test you to see what reaction you give them. ; ) And don't forget to praise good behaviour!
2006-10-08 01:57:32 · answer #4 · answered by Morgan J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
two year olds are hard as they dont fully understand right from wrong yet so it can be very trying on the parent/s believe me i know being a dad of 3 little boys it has been a handful , my advice would be to try time out (put a chair or something away from everything and every one ) and when he misbehaves sit him on it and leave him there for about a minute if he moves just pick him up and put him back , it may take abit of time but soon he will realise whats going on , kids are a handful best of luck with him i hope he settles for you soon most will grow out of it as they get older anyway just try to be patient , relax and dont stress yourself out cause he will pick up on that and push you even further so try to be calm and give yourself a break when ever you can
Best Wishes
2006-10-08 01:49:07 · answer #5 · answered by Edward f 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At this age time out is a very effective tool. I use the trick of giving them one min of time out for every year that they are. So just ask him to pick up his crayons when he refuses pick him up and put him in time out for 2 min. Then at that time explain that he's in time out because he didn't listen to you and pick up his own crayons. Now it will take some time but you have to do it each and every time or he won't understand.
2006-10-08 03:04:07 · answer #6 · answered by kholbee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him once to pick them up... then TELL him to pick them up.. then say "ok they go in the garbage" and proceed to pick them up and put in the garbage OUTSIDE- if you simply put them in the inside garbage he might realize he can get them out...
YES he will throw a fit - TOO BAD, dont give him - be serious and throw the stuff out... if its something really nice then sure you can get it later - hide it for a month or two then return it when he isnt remembering...
remember its important NOW to be firm otherwise you will have a nightmare for a teenager... sorry your husband just doesnt get this... dang that would suck
if he runs off "giggling' when you spank him, I can assure you that you are not spanking hard enough and am a beleiver that SOME spanking is ok - even good...
2006-10-08 01:58:17 · answer #7 · answered by CF_ 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you and your husband need to be on the same level, it hard to discipline a child when the other parent is not working with you. talk to your husband tell him what you want from him, and what you dont want him to do such as teaching your child to say shut up. you all need to get on the same level now or the child will be even worse to handle when he/she becomes teen
2006-10-08 01:48:26 · answer #8 · answered by bshelby2121 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
when your child refuses to listen to you you are aloud to put him in the coner for 2 minutes and when you bring your child out of the coner sit down with your child and explain to them why they were in the coner and tell them how wrong it is and when you are done talking to your child and he is done with his punishment make sure you hug your child and tell them you love them and you will learn when you get older that this is to teach you right from wrong. Your child is trying to test you paticence the best thing is not to give your child any leway by one more warning. The sooner you take part of this the faster your child will learn the difference in my parents are not taking it from me any more. a child can stand in the coner for 1 minute times their age. That is the length of their attention span.
2006-10-08 03:50:58 · answer #9 · answered by webscoundral 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reward good behaviour and punish bad behaviour
If he does what you ask, give him a treat.
If he does not listen, take his crayons away and do not return them.
2006-10-08 01:43:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋