a friend of mine gave up Christianity because Christians have treated him awful in the past.?

Question

I've heard this reason millions of times for rejecting Christianity, mind you of many belief systems and It doesn't make sence to me. Doesn't my friend worship a God and not people? Shouldn't his awful interactions with others be evidence that his beliefs on sin and its influence on everyone be justified when he gets treated badly? What should I say to him?

Answer 1

There is something that most of the people answering your question seem to forget. Now, my response will go both ways so please remember this.
There are people out there that have to live in reality and to them it is difficult to seperate reality with belief.
Now in the case of reality, my meaning is this: There are some who need to have physical proof. Not that a god exists but that the people (Christians) who follow God believe what it is they preach. Its a little like 'monkey see monkey do'.If you have a child and you don't want your child to touch something that would burn them, you wouldn't grab the hot pan and burn yourself to prove a point. Most people who are being taught something want the person who is teaching them, and expect, the person who is teaching them, to know what they are talking about and practice it.
It's easy to say,'We are all human and make mistakes and backslide.' But, to some, a person of authority is, just that, and nothing more. They believe, because they are being taught by a man, who may be speaking for a higher being, that they are acting in such a way that proves he believes what he is teaching.
However, when such a person acts contrary to what he professes to believe and acts in a way, also contrary, to these teachings, the student (child in learning) becomes confused and disenhearted. It is difficult for him to understand how a person who, in his mind, is of such a strong belief can behave in such a manner. This in itself causes the student to rethink his new found belief and question weather it is all true or not. To some and, to most, faith begins not only within themselves but also in the people who surround him. He can not learn without a teacher and if his teacher falls away from him how can he continue. He will be disappointed, not only in his teacher, but also, in himself. There is blame, shame, anger, and eventually hatered. These are difficult things to battle. Now, because he is human, his faith, was hanging on a wing and a prayer because he needed something more tangible to see and believe in and words, sometimes, are just not enough. Like they say, "The proof is in the pudding"! If his faith, even if it had been years, was given in words only and very little action, can you blame him for his anger?
Belief, meaning, the belief in something you can't feel or see comes with the strength you have aquired within yourself after learning that there is something bigger than yourself or any other human. This is something that is very difficult for people to grasp and struggle daily with. They need something to hold, because we ALL need physical tangibilities. I don't care who you are, there was something in your life that either strengthened your faith or broke it. Those of you, that have that faith, and that strength to believe in something that you can't see, seem to have forgotten that, at one point, you didn't have it. You had to find it! Why is it so difficult for those of you with un-wavering faith and belief, to think that everyone should except 'IT' and continue to except 'IT' no matter what? Did it ever occure to you that there are some who need you and borrow your faith and your belief until they find their own? If this is something you can't understand, I suggest you don't even try!
But, for those of you who can't understand, try this for one week: Close your door! Don't go to church! Don't speak to anyone you share your christian time with! Read your bible and pray! But for just seven days live without the things you believe have no strength or baring on your belief. After that week how many of you are atleast 30 mins. early for the first service, and how much, you truley missed, the support you recieved from these people.
Now, put yourself in this mans friends shoes and for one moment allow yourself to feel how empty he must have felt and is feeling.
Now, to YOU! Don't give up on your friend! There isn't anything you can say, at the moment, that will convince him to change his mind. So don't try! Be there, listen to him, let him get his anger out. Invite him out to golf or lunch or whatever it is you guys do. Show him, I MEAN REALLY SHOW HIM, what a person of true belief acts like and how you continue, everyday, with this same faith no matter what. Show him how you deal with people who test your own faith and allow him to see that you get angry just like everyone else. But, show him how you will not allow a man, any man, to take away the strength that keeps you going day in and day out. It will be your strength and your belief that will prove to him there is something more. It will be your true belief and faith that will bring him back to his point of strength.

Answer 2

I agree, I think he should probably find a new church if the people there have treated him so badly. It is very sad to say how even Christians get into terrible habits and we act like we're better than non-believers and people that are new to the religion because we aren't as "sinful" It distressed me to hear this sort of thing because I know it is an all too common problem. I would tell him that however those people treated him God doesn't condone. I think your first instinct is the best one. Christianity is not a religion in my opinion, it is a relationship with the living God and once those people understand that they will have the conviction of their ways. I pray that you are able to bring him back because too many new Christians are pushed away by just this situation.

Answer 3

Give him this reason ok...
If you have told even ONE lie (irrespective of it's color) you are a liar.
If you have stolen anything (irrespective of it's value) you are a theif.
If you have looked with lust you have commited adultery in your heart (married or not).
If you have hated anyone you have commited murder in your heart.
If you have used the Lord's name in vain ever, you have commited a VERY serious sin called blasphemy.

That's only 5 of the 10 Commandments.

How would you do if God judged you by that standard? Innocent or Guilty?

By this standard, are you deserving of heaven or hell?

Do you care?
Do you understand why you need the Saviour?

Let's say a man is brought guilty before a judge (here on earth).
He is definately guilty - he did the crimes, he knows it, the judge knows it and justice must be served (otherwise the judge would be corrupt).

Like this judge...it is God's goodness that demands punishment come to the "Law"breakers.
If you are depending on the goodness of God to save you on judgment day, be sure you understand His definition of good.

So, the guilty man is sentenced to death unless he can pay the $10,000,000,000,000 fine he incurred. He can't pay and is headed for prison and then death.

Suddenly, someone steps in and says he will pay that fine. He will give everything he has to save that unworthy criminal.

How should the criminal respond to such an offer???

That is what Jesus offers all of us. How do you respond?

Scoff at him?
Mock Him?
Spit at Him?
Choose not to believe Him and walk into the death penalty?
Think that you have a better way to escape - and that you will - somehow - you hope?

Think about it.

What hangs you up? Your eternal destiny depends on these things. There is NOTHING more important than finding out His Truth.

Answer 4

If you have gotten Saved (Spirit Recreated) by Believing in Jesus and Asking HIM to Come into your Heart and Save you, you can't really Give up Christianity. You can be a Child of GOD and go back into Sinning, but you will be Miserable.
Once your Spirit has been Recreated, you would have to Commit the Unpardonable Sin to mess your Spirit up again.
Very few Children of GOD commit this sin. It is hard to Commit and Baby Christians cannot even Commit it.

Answer 5

It is disheartening when people abandon God because of what other people do. This is a possible pitfall for people walking the path. The dangers are many, and for those with wobbly faith...well, they wobble.

What you could say to him is the following: "You find it wise to place your eternal soul in peril because of what some people did or said? Is that really a good enough reason to abandon your relationship with the creator of all things good, who knows all and brings justice to all things?"

Answer 6

Perhaps he should give up eating too, because he's probably had some food that didn't agree with him before. And maybe he should give up motor vehicles, cuz he's had some break down on him in the past. And maybe the internet, cuz the connection has dropped one too many times. People use all kinds of excuses for running away from God - anything rather than taking the blame for it on themselves.

Answer 7

Don't say anything to him about it. The more you try to convince him that he is wrong, he will resist. He has a right to his feelings. Let him go through this. Does it really matter if he professes to be Christian? Accept him as your friend no matter his religion or belief.

Answer 8

You could ask him to read the Bible some more.....and perhaps to recall that somewhere in the Bible it is written....."yea shall know them by their fruits".....and if he chooses to return to the Christian faith....then a allow him to do so in his own time. If he realizes that being treated badly is not a sign of good people doing good things to other people (ie: loving their neighbour).....allow him to walk away with no regrets.

Answer 9

Giving up his faith in God because some church people have treated him poorly, is like giving up your car just because a car salesman or the mechanic ripped you off. You may have a good right to be mad, but if you give up your car, who really gets hurt -- you or them.

Your car is your vehicle. It gets you there.
Your faith is your vehicle. It gets you to God, and to heaven.
If you give it up, then the real winner is these jerks. And who really gets hurt -- you or them.

I wish you well. Peace be with you.

Answer 10

i understand precisely what you recommend – i hit upon church centers very embarrassing, and that i'm a Christian! i've got controlled to locate a compromise that works for me, yet what to do approximately your buddy . . . She'll basically could settle for that she's finished all she would be able to for now. If she retains on at you she'll lose your friendship, and the friendship of human beings too. Even a community pastor suggested to me that Jehovah's Witnesses get themselves disliked, by knocking on doors and attempting to “push” the Christian message. In a fashion, your buddy is herself showing a loss of religion. you come from a Christian relatives, you have a feeling of appropriate and incorrect, you suspect in a extra robust skill, and you shop an open thoughts – you're a million/2 way there already. She could now pass away something to God. Quote to her Jesus' words “different sheep have I that are actually not of this fold”. which could be interpreted in many techniques – perhaps there are extraterrestrial beings on different planets, and Jesus appeared to them in a diverse type (like Aslan, in C S Lewis' Narnia thoughts, the place he imagines a international of speaking animals). yet perhaps that saying approximately “different sheep” applies to those that're no longer able to settle for Christianity as such, yet nonetheless lead solid lives; working in direction of the Christian virtues of kindness, tolerance, integrity, and so forth. I even have very solid pals like that, and does not presume to purpose to transform them until eventually they suggested the priority. i do no longer totally accept as true with you once you're saying “ i've got self belief human beings could have self belief what they like to have self belief”. Is it not extra suitable to declare “i've got self belief human beings could act in accordance to what they locate to be real?”. possibly that's what you meant! i'm satisfied to proceed the controversy by digital mail in case you decide on, yet i'm hoping that facilitates you, and your buddy, and facilitates you to maintain your friendship.

Answer 11

the bible says iron sharpens iron. and reap what you sow. so take that as see what seed they planted in him and he has been dull and damaged by the ruff treatment he recieved. sad sad thing. heard a preacher talk about it once. in a bar you can always find a friend not so in a church. be willing to talk and if you can take him to a non church church function like hayrides or bowling or other youth activities he may turn around