My uncle is homeless by choice.... my thing is that because I have a home with all of the ammenaties (sp?) he thinks he can come over and hang out all day. I have already told him many times (some times ugly) to go away and get a life. What am I doing wrong? He still comes back and I feel so guilty so I let him hang out, eat my food, use my computer, use my whole house like it is his own. Mind you, it has gotten ugly in the past so I try to avoid the drama and just let him hang...last thing, he also trys to overide my authority when it comes to my kids, honest question, please help if you have been in this situation.
2006-10-07 14:53:55 · 13 answers · asked by Aime E 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You need to take charge of the situation, don't yell and scream, he sounds like a kid, knows you don't mean it and this has no consequence. Simply tell him next time (before you let him in), he is not welcome, you are busy and don't open the door.
2006-10-07 14:59:19 · answer #1 · answered by patti duke 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate this also when family members or friends continually drop in on me w/o asking. I was taught to stay home & taught my sons that their-our house is our kingdom, our palace of privacy. It's very rude to intrude-welcome yourself time after time to anyone's home.
I would bake or make the uncle's favorite food,drop by his "homeless space" before he arrives at yours & tell him U'r happy he's in the family, but you & your's need your privacy & time for your own personal daily agenda's,schedule's,etc. And that you are considering having a family get together and you definitely want him to be there,to help you organize & put it together & you'll let him know in due time of the event.
If he doesn't see between the lines, do what I've done many times--lock the doors, ignore the doorbell,don't answer the knock, KEEP THE BLINDS/CURTAINS open that he can see you & know you are deliberately not letting him inside. He will get the picture.
Stand your ground and & stay between him & your family's privacy.
2006-10-07 22:18:38 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should tell him that you love him and that he is invading your space in your house. Tell him that he has become a pest or something of that kind and that you are the boss of your house and kids, not him. Or you can always, get a restraining order and try not answering the door whenever he knocks on it. or you can just bluntly tell him to get out of your house and not come back other wise you will call the police on him. Good Luck with your situation.
2006-10-07 22:16:46 · answer #3 · answered by Katherine S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are the Classic Enabler!!!! I do not feel sorry for you at all because you are allowing this to continue to happen. Why should you feel guilty for not allowing this man to invade your house and your life??? I would change the locks and absolutely tell him that in no uncertain terms is he to come to your house again! Tell him if he shows his face on your property, you will call the cops.......then DO IT!!! Why are you putting up with this bullshit??? You are not a very good role model for your children by showing them that you have no personal boundaries!!! Again, you are asking for what you are getting.......God!!!
2006-10-07 22:11:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about this: when he arrives at the door, say,"How nice to see you! I am extremely busy right now and have no time to visit, but it was kind of you to think of me!" Give him a hug, then go back in and shut the door. I know he won't like this, but it is very polite, and he really has nothing to complain about.
2006-10-08 00:33:44 · answer #5 · answered by The First Dragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your uncle does what he does simply because you let him.Ask him once more sternly,if that doesn't work ,put the law in his life.Simply have your local police dept issue a trespassing warning,if he violates it he will go to jail.
2006-10-07 23:58:55 · answer #6 · answered by gwaynequest 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a restraining order
2006-10-07 22:23:29 · answer #7 · answered by Mary M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See if he will be willing to do some work for you around the house. Put him to work.!
2006-10-07 21:58:29 · answer #8 · answered by nursing1care 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't open the door or restraining order
2006-10-07 22:01:12 · answer #9 · answered by butterfly8877 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Change the locks and don't let him come in.
2006-10-07 21:59:47 · answer #10 · answered by Aubrey's mommy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋