My experience so far is that everytime I have a friendship with a man, eventually I find out they want more. Some continue to be my friend even if they know I'm not interested in them romantically but some just stop hanging around.
Men, can/do you hang out with a woman as friends without being attracted to her?
2006-10-07 14:18:48 · 23 answers · asked by shar 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sorry, I'm not a guy, but I have to throw in my two cents anyway. I don't believe the crap that women can't be friends with men without some degree of sexual tension. I've never had many women friends because I'm not interested in talking or doing stereotypical woman's things. So, most of my friends have always been men, because I feel easier around them. All my boyfriends started out as friends first, except for my current boyfriend. None of them had alterior motives. I'm not ugly or fat or boyish or anything like that, but I'm also not the head-turner type for most guys of my own age, so perhaps that's where our experiences differ. I'm smart, very logical, sarcastic, but also silly and can take a joke, so my friendships are defined as such and rarely deeper than hanging out. I don't share anything more personal than something silly or funny that happened to me, except with two people -- my boyfriend and a mutual friend of the two of us who I know I can trust. Otherwise, I keep my friends at arm's length, enough so that if they were to try something like what you're talking about, I have more than enough warning that I can steer that relationship either in a direction that's more comfortable for me, or to just get rid of them if I don't think they are worth my time. My sister, on the other hand, lives in NY city and she has the exact same problem you have. She tells me that there's a culture there of men being pigs. So perhaps it's a personality conflict, or perhaps it's a regional problem.
2006-10-07 14:44:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Absolutely you can be friends with a man. Everyone needs a friend, and in my opinion the opposite sex often makes a better friend . One of my dearest friends was a man and our friendship lasted for 30 years, through thick and thin,good times and not so good times. He was there for me when my first marriage did not work out and I was left with three little girls to take care of alone. He was always there to do whatever he could to help us. When I met my second husband, he was thrilled for me and my three girls. He was the greatest. My husband was very fond of him too, but he was my special "buddy". We could talk about anything and everything. This man was very kind, understanding, trustworthy and the greatest friend I have ever had. We remained best friends until he died of cancer several years ago. I have many wonderful people in my life, but there will never be another like him I miss him. I will never forget him so yes, a man can be just "friends" with a woman.
2006-10-07 21:45:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, a man can just be friends with a woman -- especially if he is a mature man. I have plenty of female friends that I hang out with, who are good looking, smart, and definitely "date-able" (And I am single!).
While yes, there may be a sense of attraction when a man meets a woman, and a man spends a lot of time thinking about women and sex -- a mature man can keep the two separate. If a man meets and treats a woman as a human being, and an intelligent person -- and not just as a potential sex partner, he can definitely have women as friends.
If you meet guys who seemingly are "friends", but then drop out of sight once it is known that you are not interested in them romantically, then they never intended to be a "friend" in the first place.
2006-10-07 21:27:43 · answer #3 · answered by LewAR26502 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
No, not really. Maybe if a man is gay he can have loads of fun hanging out with women, but hetero men already have plenty of friends to watch sports with, go our carousing with... men really are looking for a romantic or physical connection with women, and if it gets to a point where we have no shot, the friendly part of the relationship will fade for both of you. Also, when your guy-pal meets another woman and becomes more than friends with her, she will probably put the Kibosh on his time with you anyway. Sorry to say this to you but in my opinion the answer is no. Even if in the course of being a couple a man has to hang around with some of your other girlfriends, he is attracted to them too. In fact he probably has them rated as plan B, C, D, E, accordingly.
2006-10-07 21:30:07 · answer #4 · answered by No More 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I've had the same best friend from highschool which was over 30 years ago, it is a guy. He and I dated for a time but nothing came of it. He is married, has kids and grand kids but has remained my best friend, His wife and I are friends, and I'm godmother to one of his children. Yes there CAN be friendships between men and women and it's not as difficult as it seems...the two just have to be resovled that it remains friendship and doesn't develop into something more, that includes YOU as well as the guy.
2006-10-07 21:22:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Thats a huge NO! If us guys wanted a friend we would get a dog. We need women and want them . We only say we will be just friends hopeing to get closer. Dont fool your self or lead him on. Girls cant answer this and think thier right . they think they have a guy friend and everythings cool. But that guy wants more than friendship unless thier gay. Any real guy would tell you the same thing.
2006-10-07 21:25:15 · answer #6 · answered by us citizen 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I guy CAN be your friend....but in the back of their minds, they always want more. Aguy looks at every female and judges whether they would hit that or not. I have had several friends that were guys....but I knew they always wanted more. Sometimes it is more of a compliment then what alot of women think. If they are willing to respect your not interesed in them and they are still hangin...it should be cool. Just be careful.
2006-10-07 21:23:49 · answer #7 · answered by Languastina 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
My very best friend is like a sister to me and we have had a friendly relationship for over thirty years. I've seen her through some real bad relationships and she has seen me go through hell and back with my relationships. She's been there when my family has forsaken me and her kids call me uncle and her husband of seventeen yrs. and herself would leave their bed to see I sleep comfortably when I go back east to visit but I never take advantage of their love for me. I love her more than a sister and would risk nothing like even thinking romantically about her and vise-a-versa. It is possible to have a best friend or just a friend of the opposite sex who isn't interested in u for just sex all the time. I'm living proof.
2006-10-07 21:28:19 · answer #8 · answered by papabeartex 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Girl, I do believe that there are some many who truly just want to be friends but from my experience someone always seems to eventually want more.
2006-10-07 21:21:31 · answer #9 · answered by education_sks 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I had a best male friend and we ended up as roommates. I fell in love he didn"t I moved out after he met a girl and it really hurt me. We were so close now I miss him so much. I wish I had my friend back. I never wanted to fall in love it just happend good Luck!
2006-10-07 21:32:45 · answer #10 · answered by pookiepoo11 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋