Why does it seem like the kids that misbehave the most come from the poorest families?

Question

Before anyone goes off on me, this is just from my experience. Whenever I go to any public place, the kids that are running around the store, getting into stuff, yelling back at their parents, knocking stuff off the shelfs, being loud, are dressed like little ragamuffins, seem to belong to the parents who are dressed in old ratty clothes, look like their hair hasn't been washed in a week, and are pulling out their food stamps to pay for their groceries. The parents that are dressed clean and neat, have their hair groomed and are paying for their own groceries, seem to have well behaved children.
Please don't take me as judgemental, cause this is exactly what I see when I go to the grocery store every single time.

Seems pretty true where I live. You guys don't live in my town. I know what I have seen. Next time you come down here to Texas, I will take you to WalMart and let you see what I see.

Answer 1

Simply because welfare pays. Kids are having kids for profit.More than once I have heard the expression well I just found out I am going to get a raise I am pregnant again. Free baby sitting in all our schools, being paid to stay in school.
Laws on the books that prevent the control or discipline of our kids.And the list goes on. And this is from the white kids you should hear what benefits children of ethnic back grounds. receive.
This is not a poor issue so much as it is a bleeding heart governmental issue that wants to make every one believe they know better and can set guidelines as to how we should raise our families and live our lives.
Lord send me back to the 40's and early 50's Amen.

Dolphin mama is a nut job and is one of the reasons we are in the fix we are now in. While it does take a education to run a corporation or a high skills job.It does not take a formal education to raise a family properly.

Answer 2

I don't usually answer a whole lot of questions, but I saw this one and it struck a nerve, so I have to put in my 2 cents worth. I work in a local restaurant in a community with an even distribution of upper and lower class citizens. I can tell you that alot of the upper class families that come into the restaurant have the worst behaved children. They have no manners. They run around unsupervised. I truly hate having to clean up the messes that their parents let them make. On the other hand, the children of the lower class families are usually the most polite when it comes to asking for things and their parents keep a pretty tight rein on them. I rarely find a total disaster left when they leave. I'm not saying this is true on all occasions. I do know kids who are absolute terrors that come from low income families. Heck... I think my kids can be absolute terrors sometimes....and YES, we are low income. I also know very well mannered and well behaved kids from upper class families. But I don't think the income level has anything to do with how a kid behaves. It has to do with what they are taught and the consequences they receive for the way they act. I'm guessing that you don't consider yourself to be lower class or you wouldn't have asked this question. Only someone who thought they were better than the people they are complaining about would be ignorant enough to post this question.

Answer 3

First of all , I came from a poor family.My Mother had food stamps to buy grocery's and our clothes were second hand.My brothers and I never once misbehaved as you are suggesting poor kids do.I went to school and got a education so I wouldn't have to raise my children the way I was brought up.You dont want to seem judge mental but you are being.Just because your poor doesn't represent how you behave.It's the values your parents teach you.I didn't have much growing up but, I was taught to respect people and the places you are at.It's not what the people look like it's what there parents teach them.I could just as easly say.The reason these kids dont act like this is because there a bunch of spoiled rich brats that mommy and daddy give them everything if even a whimper comes from there mouth.So maybe that's why there so good at the store.

Answer 4

I hate Wal Mart anyway, nothing against the store, just the people shopping there (and most of the employees). Anyway.
I don`t know why that is.
I think that no matter if you are rich or poor, to teach your child manners and have them obey the rules.
Everyone should have Rules and Structure and Respect for others and for Themselves.
That`s in theory. I am lucky that I was blessed with two great girls (of course they can be little demons at times, but that is only about 30% of the time..lol)
Maybe they think that the world owes them something, because they are "poor", maybe they are frustrated and unhappy, or maybe they just don`t give a ****...
I am by no means rich and yes i used to receive food stamps, but I care about myself and my family more than that.

Answer 5

For one, it's not just POOR people who have bad children, at least their parents are with them and not paying some damn nanny to raise their kids. Children will misbehave no matter what economic, racial, or goegraphical background they come from. Poor parents also don't have the money to buy stuff to shut the kid up. It's also due to kids who fight sleep when they are supposed to be taking naps before they go out. Keep an open mind from now on. Try shopphing in places other than Wal-mart and you won't see much of a difference really. Kids are kids no matter how poor or rich their parents are!!!!!!

Answer 6

we have discussed this issue in my moms group before-
i live in texas and i have seen the exact opposite-i worked in a daycare in a very affluent area,and the kids were complete monsters.also the children in my neighborhood are rude and completely run wild!we live in an upper middle class neighborhood.i used to work at a daycare in california that was aimed at welfare familys or lower middle class familys and most of the kids were angels.

when i go to the grocery store here in texas the parents who are well groomed and seem to be well off are the ones who are talking on there phones or something else ,and NOT paying attention to there children whatsoever.

just because someone is paying with food stamps and they cannot afford brand new clothes for there children does not mean they are bad parents!

Answer 7

I honestly think its not because the parents were never taught manners, you don't know what their up bring was like. When money is tight you are always on edge wondering if your electric will be shut off or whether you'll be able to feed your family. You always worry about just providing enough for your children for them to stay alive and be healthy for the most part. When I am stressed I notice that I yell more and take it out on my daughter more than what she deserved for what she did wrong, so i try not to discipline when i am really stressed. I take a minute to calm down before I talk to her about the issues. If these people are stressed everyday about just the little necessities that many of us take for granted like paying for groceries, maybe they are not able to discipline correctly so they figure since they are just scrapping by and always have to say no to the "extras" that their kids want, they aren't going to make a big deal when the kids are rambuctious.

Answer 8

I work with children and see children everyday from all kinds of backgrounds.

I believe the most challenging chidren are the ones that are in full time care, not rich or poor families. Children need attention , love, nurturing and guidance. Parents need to set rules, limits and bounderies for their children to follow. All of this instills a sense of security in a child.

Children who have limited contact with their parents and no rules limits and bounderies are the ones with challenging behaviour. They are looking for attention and "misbehaving" is a way for them to gain their craved attention.

These days there are less rules and different parenting techniques. People are afraid to discipline their children, especially in public. If a child is going to play up or do the wrong thing, at the shops is a perfect place for it to happen.

I don't know about your theory with the children from poor families misbehaving, perhaps they stand out more because of their appearance.

Jackstar, AUSTRALIA

Answer 9

How can you say not to be judgmental? That is a very judgmental assumption!!! I have seen these types of children on both sides. Parents that look like they have money, who buy their kids everything and then the time they say no, their kid starts screaming and yelling so loud you can hear them on the other side of the store! I think you need to widen your horizons, and open your eyes! Or maybe find a different place to shop! Besides, all the families on that show Nanny 911 are well to do families, not poor ones. I would say you are the epitomy of stereotyping!

Answer 10

I'm sorry but this question has really upset me...I am on disability raising 3 beautiful children and yes, I have to pull out my foodstamp card at the grocery store...my children and myself are clean and wellgroomed. My children don't do the things you have mentioned...you're stereotyping poor parents!! I have seen far worse things from children of wealthy people, like the temper tantrums that are thrown if their children don't get their own way or get something they ask for anf low and behold the fit that comes if the parent says no, and the children even striking their parents....us poor folks DO teach our children manners. Weath does NOT contribute to the kind of parent you are, you could be of any financial status and have well behaved or naughty children, it depends on the parent not their money.

Answer 11

Maybe those parents don't do a good job of taking care of themselves or their kids either but I have often witnessed wild kids with parents who are perfectly groomed and just seem to be in their own little world and let the kids run wild. My daughter is in a rather affluent high school and says that most of the kids there are getting drunk every weekend, having sex and doing all kinds of drugs. They show up Monday in fancy cars bragging about their weekend adventures and complaining about their hangovers. They have enough money to finance that lifestyle and their parents are too involved in their careers or social life to really care about what their kids are doing. Sometimes the parents themselves give the children alcohol and drugs but look great in their designer clothes and luxury cars. Appearances can be deceiving.