Last month me and my friend began dating. Three months ago, he slept with another girl. I believe him when he said he used a condom b/c we always use it. He said she told him she used morning after pill but found out she lied. He says he told her from the jumpstreet he just wants sex. He wants children someday, he says he doesn't want a child by her. He no longer likes her & has told and shown her that he planned to stop talking to her anyway if not for her pregnancy. One day she texts him asking for money for an abortion, he sees her about the details she changes her mind.This week he told me that he let her know she'd get a monthly check after the baby's born and nothing more and there was no chance of them being together. She said she understood and "didn't want it anymore than he does since she already has a child by another guy that won't pay support" but she's going to have the baby anyway. I don't know this girl or her side or what he's telling her. What should I do?
2006-10-07 11:06:05 · 13 answers · asked by Cyliasis 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You might need to give this guy some time, This is to make sure that he's not with you just for the sex but because he wants a relationship with you. You will see how much he really cares about you.
2006-10-07 11:17:30 · answer #1 · answered by rahlo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your right its two sides to every story. Now put yourself in this womans place. If this man was your friend why didnt you know he was in a relationship(sexual)? Now as soon as he stops seeing this woman he comes to you.Bringing this drama with him. He knew how he ended things with this other woman. Right now he needs to be a man. Even though this is the woman second child alone I am sure she has doubts and keeps changing she mind(hormones and reality setting in). This woman is a single parent and she is not with the unborn childs father for the second time. I am sure that she has had doubts wondering should she do this again .She is facing taken care of this man child without his help. How do you think it makes her feel at this point he isnt standing by her. They both played a part in having this child.How can he say that all this child will get is a check. If he is saying these harsh things to you I can only imagine how he talks to her.Now wouldnt verbal abuse make you have doubts? This child would deserve his time and attention for the next 18 yrs. Right now he is being hard and only thinking about himself. How he always use protection and then this happens.Once he see his child face then it might be another story. This doesnt mean he has to see this woman he just need to support his child. This woman is hurting so yes she is looking for answers but all she gets from him is get rid of it. He has to remember that when you go looking for just sexual encounter that there are some consequences for his actions. I am just sorry that your in the middle of all this. Continue to be the friend you are and dont get caught up like this female did you see how this man can become.
2006-10-07 18:45:40 · answer #2 · answered by justturning40 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you should have sex with this guy anymore. I also don't think that you should make his problems with this other girl your problems. He is the one who has to deal with the consequences of his own actions. Not you. Maybe it's best if you went your separate ways at least until he figures out what is going on with this other girl. You may not like the idea so much but things could get really complicated if you ended up pregnant by chance. Condoms are not 100% Catch my drift? He may be your friend but I don't have any respect for guys who just go after girls for sex. If this does turn out to be his child, legally he will be responsible for paying support. Are you sure that you want to be involved in all of this as a girlfriend? Think about it.
2006-10-07 18:21:02 · answer #3 · answered by star28mama 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out quick... ! This is very bad ! Do nothing... Tell him you are no longer the other woman. She won ! This is a very bad place for you to be. I am sorry but, men, or boys if you will ...
.... Well (we are all the same)...
We never really grow up. You are in the worst place. Find another guy and do not get into a triangle.. Some end in very bad ways, ...even death.
There is nothing good in this for you. He needs to take care of these things in a permanent way. The only solution is to back out right away. If he wants you he will fix this and return...
Otherwise you are in Check ! The game is chess and your side is down a Qween ! Sorry - You might not pick my answer but I have your best interest in mind and that is more important that if you pick my response..
8-0
2006-10-13 21:48:14 · answer #4 · answered by Skin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only you can make this decision, he will be tied to her for 18 years, or so, because of the child. This is something that you need to think about long and hard. Ask yourself if he is committed to you? can you trust him? may be you should talk to the baby's mom, that should give you some answers. I hope it all works out for you!
2006-10-07 18:14:47 · answer #5 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump him! Besides the fact that this guy has no consideration for anyone but himself he also can't be man enough to accept responsibility for his actions. Is this the kinda guy you really wanna be with?
You know how he'd treat you if you got into the same situation... a monthly cheque!
2006-10-07 18:12:11 · answer #6 · answered by Salacity 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he cheated on you AND lied about using protection he isnt worth your time. you should dump him, he may have been a good friend but it doesn't sound like he's a very good boyfriend.
2006-10-07 18:12:27 · answer #7 · answered by nikki n 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop having sex.
2006-10-07 18:09:47 · answer #8 · answered by Wise ol' owl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WHAT!!! Get rid of her QUICK!!! She'll be in every confersation you have w/ him! Give him some advice to help her and don't say anymore!
2006-10-07 18:13:13 · answer #9 · answered by Angel of Music 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are goin to have to deal with it cause that is his kid now whether u like it or not..he knew tha conciquences before he had sex with he can either take tha responsebilty for his actions!!!
2006-10-07 18:16:23 · answer #10 · answered by alicia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋