couple girls told me that I will do a lot better with tips from the regular guys if I wear tiny shorts, mini skirts...tight tops etc...and not to wear my wedding ring or diamond....I want to make as much money as possible should I do this? I am 28. They also said I should NEVER talk about my husband....
2006-10-07 10:22:19 · 8 answers · asked by julie s 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
which is more important to you? money or you integrity?
the love of money is the root of all evil.
if you stay true to your self, thing always work out.
2006-10-07 10:26:44 · answer #1 · answered by Hannah's Grandpa 7 · 5⤊ 1⤋
You may make a little more money. But is it worth alienating your husband, and disrespecting the symbols of your marriage?
Careful, this is a very slippery slope.
Added: Given the true nature of your predicament, I thought that more specifics might be helpful to you.
Back in the eighties I was a bartender. I was not married, but did have a boyfriend (who later became my husband). And, if you've taken on a second job, then obviously you have a need to supplement your primary income ... so the money is important.
So, in the spirit of being helpful: When I tended bar, I always focused on my attire matching the professional appearance of those in the restaurant/bar service industry. Black bottom, and crisp, white or light colored top. Short skirts were all the rage back then, and yes I did wear them. But, never without full black tights, not pantyhose. I did not show much skin: face, neck, and arms only. I found that if my customers respected me, they would show that in their tips. I made a habit out of wearing small pearl earings and necklace (pearls exemplify purity and generally send out the message of respectability).
Of course, that did not mean that I didn't get hit on, it happened alot. And, when it did, I would thank the patron for the compliment, and politely let them know that I was 'taken'. To which they would generally respond in some way like: He's a lucky man.
It was a rule, and I believe a good one, that my boyfriend was not to be a barfly. Mostly out of respect for him. Yes, there will be advances, and he should not have had to witness them. But, also there was a liablity issue. If he witnessed a rude advance, he would have thought it his responsibility to protect my honor. Since bar fights are never good for business, I deemed it appropriate to request that he just avoid my work place.
If I was married at the time, I definitely would have worn a simple, wedding band. Not some 'honker' stone that would get in the way of doing my job, but a simple ring, to show that I honored my vows. If you do not wear the ring, and people later find out that you're married, it will be perceived as a sign that you might be open for a little hanky-panky on the side.
There were other bartenders who wore skimpy clothing. They generally did not make as much in tips as I did. And, they tended to draw many more slobbering pigs than I did. Who wants to deal with that?
2006-10-07 17:31:01 · answer #2 · answered by gemlover 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If I were back in the biz, I wouldn't wear my rings but not so that people didn't know I was married - but because I actually *did* lose a diamond out of my ring while I was tending bar one night LOL! Someone *really* got some ice in their drink, I guess.
AFA not talking about your husband, you really shouldn't be talking much about yourself at all. A good bartender/cocktail waitress answers very simply and then turns the conversation back around to the customer.
I would never lie if someone asked if I was married. I would not have conversations that I felt were inappropriate for a married woman to engage in. But I wouldn't go out of my way to tell everyone I was married - it's not part of my job, KWIM? Concentrate on the customer and make small talk about them and their life.
I also wouldn't wear skimpy clothes to make xtra tips, but I wouldn't wear sweatpants either! I think if you go a bit more conservative but classy you can do well too. That's one thing I feel strongly about.
Good luck in your new job.
2006-10-07 17:33:30 · answer #3 · answered by tagi_65 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't have a problem with the attire go for it. It works for the Hooters girls! Also make sure you husband is ok with it too.
2006-10-07 17:34:49 · answer #4 · answered by Bigboi47 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
true that, flaunt it if you got it for bigger tips.
hide the fact you are married for bigger tips
if its all about the money, then play it to make money.
then go home at night with your cash!
2006-10-07 18:29:19 · answer #5 · answered by CWB 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't think your husband would approve. I know I wouldn't. And if he does....then just stick to your trailer and whore out of it.
2006-10-07 17:30:02 · answer #6 · answered by g g 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
What you should do is ask this question 10 more times. Thanks for the points.
2006-10-11 13:46:26 · answer #7 · answered by Peri 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, do it and you can probably make more screwing them also.
2006-10-07 17:50:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋