I was just on the train and noticed some poor kid who seemed ostracized by his "friends," who kept sneaking up in the seat behind him and flicking his ears. Felt sorry for him. It didn't register immediately but I regret not saying something on his behalf, though I also didn't want to embarrass him any further and also not sure here what the proper role of a concerned stranger would be in this sort of case. It's not like they were beating him up or anything. What do you think? Turn the other way or get involved?
2006-10-07 09:52:29 · 22 answers · asked by pat800 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
stick up to them or just tell an adult that can take care of it... that would probably be best
2006-10-07 09:54:15 · answer #1 · answered by Ryan M 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sort of depends: You probably should intervene to stick up for the kid. Explain to them how it is very rude to constantly annoy someone and pick on them. However, if these people are real big bullys,and you don't think you can handle it,go to an adult or teacher. Of course, if the kid they are picking on did something to make the "bullys" do that,I'm not sure if it IS your place to intervene. Just help when you see is fit or you know you can make a difference by telling them what is right. But remeber you can always go to your parents or teacher, and there is nothing wrong with that,,as long as your not tattleing all the time,:)
PS: Also, whoever is asking this question,if your an adult, then you should already see when the situation is right to step in.
2006-10-07 16:57:51 · answer #2 · answered by BoBa QuEeN 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
You really shouldn't get in the way with things like this. There will be times when this happens, but anything could happen , and it might seem a little weird for a stranger to just walk up and say something to the kids on the other's behalf.
One time me and my mom went to the movies, and why we were coming from the concession line, there was like 2 kids standing around what looked like their "friends" and all of them had a beer in their hand. The 2 looked wayyy drunk, and my mom got concerned, but I talked her out of it because later, an employee whose business it was to do those things and to make sure they don't drive, came and got them help. If my mom would have done that who knows what they could have done because she's not an authority figure.
2006-10-07 20:07:39 · answer #3 · answered by ~Colleen~ 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
As someone who was picked on quite a bit when younger, I can say that it just eggs these types of kids on when they get the attention they want from someone else, in addition to the person who is the butt of their prank.
I would leave the situation alone, unless I was familiar enough with the children and knew it was a troublesome situation - then I would go to the parents of the children instigating the matter.
2006-10-08 13:39:45 · answer #4 · answered by JenV 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't feel like you should have gotten involved, because these kids where or is his friends and sometimes kids just will do stuff like this to show friendship or for whatever reason. When that kid get's enough of it, then you can bet he'll stand up sooner or later. Like you, I hope it's sooner. You are a good person to care enough to wonder about what you should have done. I always want to help people myself like that to. But sometimes they have to learn that these kids are not his or her friends and as soon as he gets this through his head then, he'll be ok. And you'll be Blessed for being such a caring and good person so I hope this makes since to you. thank you for Caring for that kid! God Bless You!
2006-10-07 18:33:44 · answer #5 · answered by SecretUser 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Turning the other way didn't help the kids at Columbine. I say yes, intervene, help, anything. If he gets embarassed a little , okay. But what if this was just a cycle of torment this kid takes from his so called friends all of the time? Maybe he just needs someone to stand up for him once until he gets courage to stand up for himself.
2006-10-07 19:06:24 · answer #6 · answered by )o( 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell the bullies to stop, or get the cops involved if need be. We as a society have tolerated bullying for too long, with dire consequences in many cases. Who knows- you may just prevent the straw that would break the camel's back.
2006-10-08 19:19:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand how you feel. Saying something might embarass him or trigger more grief for him later by the bullies. I think the guilt of not having said something would get to me too. But, the bullies need to know that this behavior is not acceptable and might be effective coming from a stranger. Kids can be so mean!
2006-10-07 16:59:37 · answer #8 · answered by Cam 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I probably would of got involved and it might not have helped but I would of felt better. Those kids were not his friends or they would not have treated him in such a manor. It's hard to say if it would of done any good. But is obviously bothering you. Next time say something and see what happens.
2006-10-07 22:11:54 · answer #9 · answered by purrfectsandcastle 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd probably give them a disconcerting look or the evil eye. If it was really bad I would say something in a joking manner. I wouldnt want to look like this big bad authority figure.
2006-10-07 17:01:35 · answer #10 · answered by Snuz 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not doing something or saying something often makes the bystander as guilty as the kids or adults picking on someone.
It's just the ' right' thing to do. Wouldn't you want someone to stand up for you if you were being picked on or bullied?
2006-10-07 16:56:35 · answer #11 · answered by Lizzy-tish 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋