I have 1 year old son, Recently my in laws came to look after him, As my baby has problem with legs due to cyst in his back. I was behaving very well with them from the first day of their arrivale, but they are not treating my son very well they r saying greater things about their first son' son. n my father in law wont taking of my son he is just sitting in sofa n controlling my son instead of excercising his legs, n my mother in law always telling about her first daughter in laws so n so things, n commenting about my food preparation. now a days i became very silent with them almost not talking with them. is this problem with my nature or really is ther bad thing. as i was looking my son so sweetly with sweet sweet words but they r not like that they have less patients n also they came from rural area so using bad words sometimes.
2006-10-07 09:04:36 · 8 answers · asked by lalasaqueen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well, it was nice of them to try, anyway.
Apparently they aren't going to be much help. Maybe it is time for them to go. Say, "Thanks for the break, folks, but I can take it from here." Kiss them goodbye and send them along.
I have a motto when it comes to family helping in all but the most dire of circumstances: Please don't help me...... No one is going to care for my man, my kids, or my house like I do. Everyone else's perception of what I do is inferrior. So I just keep my business to myself.
As far as comments go the most you can do is say, "That's nice, Mother in Law." and leave it alone. She does the same thing to the other girls, I guarantee it.
Cooking: If she makes a comment ask her to show you how she does it. Ask her before the meal is done, just get all the stuff out and then ask her....Mom, how would you do this? If you're lucky she'll kick you out of the kitchen and do it herself.....maybe you will catch a break....so what if she thinks you're dumber than rocks, at least you got out of cooking.......
Have your husband address the foul language. NOT you! He can tell his dad you guys find it offensive and do not talk like that in the house. Let him take it from there.
When you are speaking with relatives speak to them with respect. They are only doing what they know the best way they can. They thought you needed help and came, God bless them for that. Do not react to what they say. Just breathe, think of what you would say to a friend, and respond. Respond, don't react. Calmly and respectfully. (Let's see the other daughter in laws pull that one off.) When they go they should hold you in high regard, if nothing else, for the way you do respond to them. They love you and the baby in the only way they know. God bless and keep you all.
2006-10-07 09:53:11 · answer #1 · answered by Sunbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love your baby as a mother naturally should that carries them 9 months in their body & near your heart-do not leave the lil darling alone with those 2. Get them out of your house, quit work, eat stale bread & drink water if you have to. They resent the grandson & the fact they are there. If husband doesn't back you up, call a women's shelter,pack a bag or 2 for you & the babe, & get a peaceful nonstressful life for you & your child. You are responsible for his upbringing.Call St Jude's Hospital, treatment there is free for all children..then you certainly won't have to listen to the in-laws insults and see their ugly attitudes....or faces.
2006-10-07 16:34:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your in-laws don't understand your son's special needs. Perhaps they are uncomfortable because they don't see him as being normal. Though why they should see him this way is beyond me. One of our grandsons is blind. We love him just as much as all of our other grandchildren. I can understand why you would become withdrawn from them. Especially if they were making glowing comments about other grandchildren and unkind comments about your precious son. You and your husband need to have a talk with your in-laws. Put your cards on the table. Your husband needs to be on your side. And his parents should be supportive of you and him as you care for your son and his special needs. God bless all of you.
2006-10-07 09:31:51 · answer #3 · answered by celticwoman777 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, I know where you're coming from. In-laws can really make life unbearable sometimes, especially mother-in-laws who are critical and think that they know everything. I have one of those! Remember, you're in control here. You can control their visits so that they aren't constantly around and in your hair. Give yourself some space and some breathing room. Space improves things greatly!
2006-10-07 16:16:14 · answer #4 · answered by Megan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes in-laws are like that... esp. mothers-in-law are notorious for being critical. Believe me, honey a lot of women deal w/ this & I say if they're tolerable then just kill them w/ kindness... if they really offend you, though then say something like "I don't appreciate comments like that" & your husband should back you up. best of luck-
2006-10-07 09:07:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
have a grown up talk with them and tell them how you feel, they sound rude to me, but maybe they dont realize they are hurting your feelings, every one has their own way to take care of children, you are the mom and its your responsibility to take care of your child the way you want to. GOOD LUCK and be calm if you decide to talk with them.
2006-10-07 09:09:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell them to get out of your house
2006-10-07 09:18:05 · answer #7 · answered by just_me_1955 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dunno what you can do
2006-10-07 09:10:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋