my fiancee has lost interest insex?

Question

he is not cheating on me he's already been checked out at the doctoer they say he's normal what else could be wrong? I try to understand and give himtime but it's hard cause I want it when he doesn't. He has not been that much of a horny guy but we youst to hae sex every few days now I'm lucky to get it once a week he's 22 he should not be like this. He says sex is not that important in a committed relashionship but I say it's important but not the most important cause it makes you and your partner want to show how you feel towards one another.Anymore he getspist off whenever i bring it up in bed or when I'm tryihgn to gethimhorny I tell him that when you reject me it feelslike I'm ugly, fat and stuff. He says it's b.s. I'm like it's not cause you should understand my point of view. I told him if you were in my shoes you'd feel the same way and he's like no i would understand. it's such a mess can someone help me out?I'm so upset, stressed out over this.

Answer 1

You have to realize that all us guys are not horny feinds like most people think guys are. after the initial excitment wears off some guys get the urge only once a week or two weeks. Some months we get horny every day, and some months the desire just goes away for week or two. I find that if my wife wears sexy clothes and is sweet I get turned on . But you will have to decide if a man with low sex drive is what you really can be happy with in the long run.

Answer 2

Girl, he's either cheating or on drugs. Most 22 year old guys that i know are horny all the time.

Also, when he was checked out did they check for chemical imbalance. His stuff might just be out of wack.

But my money is on the drugs or cheating. In any case I would do a little detective work. Because all the signs are there. Anger, denial, your not getting it, (so someone is), and he's giving you the guilt trip.
Sweetie run run as fast as you can. (even faster than the gingerbread man)
This situation is not of your making so don't project such self effacing **** onto yourself. You are not fat, ugly or anything. HE is having issues that he isn't willing to come to terms with. I recommend taking a break from him.

But in the mean time, have him take a drug test. And have a friend follow him around to see if he's cheating. Because like i said. If you are not getting it. Someone is.

Answer 3

Is it possible he is going through depression? Is he stressed at work? When my husband and I were first starting out we went through the same thing. We were only 19 and he was suddenly never wanting sex. I thought it was me. I had put on a couple of pounds. Not much but it made me think that was the reason. He swore it wasn't. I also started questioning his sexual orientation. I mean, how could a 19 yr. old male turn down sex all the time! But during this time we were under a lot of financial stress. He hated his job. He was depressed a lot. I always saw sex as a stress reliever. But for him stress made it so he wasn't in the mood. Somehow we managed to make it through and many years and 2 1/2 kids later we are more passionate than we've ever been. He is in the mood more than I am now!!

Don't give up on him. Try to be patient. Figure out if there is stress. Maybe a vacation, a change in lifestlye...something. Good luck!

Answer 4

Hi there,
Sex is a very important part of a successfull relationship because if there is an imbalance ( either side this needs to be discussed) because it will lead to the downfall of your relationship, as in a relationship (committed) it's not sex it's love making and Intamacy ( showing and sharing your love for each other in a physical way).

Also please don't be offended but everybody says my partner is NOT playing up and in a lot of cases they are proved wrong!!??.

And also they say that if a relationship is deadin the bedroom it is over again because of the Intimacy factor.....

Sit him down and have a good chat to him and everything checks out and is just "going through something" suggest Councelling for him...

Good luck.

Answer 5

not good, not good at all.

if this is how he is now, and you're not even married, well it's only going to get worse.

there's two things that are so wrong:

1. he can't communicate to you very well. he tells you how you should feel and totally invalidates you. not a good move, coz you'll rebel eventually.

2. his idea that sex isn't important is so far from the truth. maybe if he was marrying himself, but when you want it and he doesn't then a compromise has to be found, and fast.

i think you're doing the right thing, keep talking with him and make your point clear. if it helps, maybe write your thoughts and take your time to be clear and objective. then give them to him so he can take time to read them and hopefully get the idea that you are seriously concerned about this.

personally if you don't get any satisfaction then i'd be seriously thinking about leaving him before you make a mistake and get married. if he doesn't want to even try to fix what's bothering you now, what's it going to be like after you're married.

best of luck with this.

Answer 6

If he isn't diseased,Impotent, insecure about his performance,overworked, cheating, gay, or a religious prude, he may be hiding something else.Many Women have libidos that are every bit as strong as a man's, but it is rare indeed to find a Woman whose libido is stronger than her partner's.Another possiblity is that he has sexual desires that he is ashamed of, or fears he cannot express with you, and these desires may very well have become the impetus for his arousal.Talk to him about things like bdsm, or any number of the things that are outside the sexual "Norm" if it doesn't involve anything illegal or doing something against someone's will ( Including your own) you may want to start experimenting.Hope this helps.

Answer 7

ahh i dunno honey, could he be stressed in his job? be pressured about anything at all? i dunno if this would put him off sex, but it does for me. just stop asking why he wont maybe the pressure of you asking all the time is putting him off. thats all i can advice really as i aint a bloke and men are weird to figure out, some on here just say he is f**king someone else and some say the opposite, i really dont know whats going on with him, but i think stop pressuring him and asking him why he dont want to, just go and get a vibrator. ;o)

Answer 8

He may be stressed out coz of something at work...find out. many couples lose interest in sex, just give him space and see what happens

Answer 9

I AM A MAN THIS HAPPENED TO ME ALSO
PROBLEM
AND BELIEVE ME IS QUITE NORMAL SPECIALLY FOR AGE BETWEEN 37 TO 45
PUSH HIM TO DO MORE EXCERCISE , LESS STRESS
ALSO FM YOU SIDE YOU HAVE TO TRY AND BE MORE ATTRACTIVE TO HIM TYPE OF YOUR DRESS IS TOO IMPORTANT SHUD NOT BE SEXY ALLWAYS , BETTER TO WEAR SECY WHEN YOU ARE ALSO IN GOOD MOOD AND YOU FEEL IS TIME TO DO

Answer 10

He has not lost interest is Sex he has lost interest in SEX WITH YOU. LOSE A FEW POUNDS,
TONE UP
DO MORE ORAL
ANAL SEX..
OUTDOOR
BDSM
WATERSPORTS
DRESS TO IMPRESS
GROUP
SWAPPING

IF YOU DO NOT..SOMEONE ELSE WILL

ps ignore the God Squad and feminists who will answer you God Bless You Sister xx