I am going through Hell right now... I am facing 3 years in jail fer datign a girl 3 years younger than me, and she's jest under the legal age... in 2 months, she'll be 18, and her dad is pressing charges... It is all up to the county attorney whether charges are pressed or not.. I cut fer 6 years, and I quite before Christmas of 05, and today I cut fer the first time since then... I thought I was over it, but I ran out of meds, and now all this is happening, and to add to it, my mum went to the hospital today bc she is stressing out about my situation which caused ulcers in her abdomen, and they are talking about surgery, and if I go to jail, I wont be there fer her... To add to all of this, I jest got my accociates degree in Adolescent Psychology, and if these charges are pressed, I will more than likely have to register as a sex offender which will screw up my entire life!!! Making my whole life pointless! So whats the point in continuing on??? Can anyone tell me?
2006-10-06 21:00:12 · 12 answers · asked by Nick R 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Why is the first line about cutting? That's clearly a symptom, not the problem.
In future, don't run out of your meds. Get your prescription refilled when you still have a few pills left, so you'll never need to be without them.
Are you and the girl still together? If so, you've nothing to worry about legally. Yeah, it's statutory rape. But if you both just tell them you never had sex, they can't prove otherwise without a physical exam or her testimony. Anything her parents say happened is hearsay and not admissable in court. They could prove it with a physical exam within a few hours of you two having had sex, but they can't do a medical exam without her consent (make sure she knows that, though, as most doctors will let her think it's her parent's choice and not her's). They can't force her to testify if she doesn't want to.
If you're not still together and she does choose to testify, then it's still just her word against yours without physical evidence or eyewitness testimony (her parents seeing you come over, or even go up to her room doesn't count, as it doesn't prove you actually "went all the way"). Most likely, the attorney won't want to press charges at all without more evidence, but they often feel pressure from the "victim" and her family to press charges.
If he does, hire a good lawyer. Yeah, it'll be expensive, but this isn't the time to cheap out. The last thing you want is a public defender who'll sleep through the trial and can't remember your name, let alone the facts of the case. Ask your parents for help or take out loans if you need to, but there's too much at stake for it not to be worth it.
2006-10-07 04:11:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The point in "continuing on" is that life is good.
I KNOW that sounds like glib, stupid, happy-face crap, but it ISN'T. Once you start making better choices, you'll be AMAZED at how good life can be!
The bad times do not last any longer than the good ones do.
LOSE the self pity and the blame, AND the drama. You AND your Mom are each going to have to sort out your OWN problems.
Seek professional counselling, Associates Degree in Adolescent Psychology or not. Even Psychiatrists have to be psychoanalyzed before getting their license. As I understand an Associates Degree, it is two years of college. You have a LONG way to go.
Get your lawyer to talk to the girl's father and the County Attorney. Maybe you can plea-bargain. How old are you? How old is the girl? If you are close in age, the chances of jail time, and being required to register as a sex-offender, are slim, unless you raped her. Three years age difference shouldn't be that big of a deal!
Start dating women above the age of consent, fer Pete's sake!
If you end up doing time, do it, and LEARN.
Cutting yourself hurts ONLY YOU. Seek treatment. STOP. Yes, it IS that simple. I didn't say "easy," I said "simple."
Cruel, but TRUE.
My heart goes out to you, but you really have to start learning how to make better choices!
STOP feeling sorry for youself! Best advice that I can give you!
2006-10-06 21:21:32 · answer #2 · answered by zen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think!!!! You are what, about 22 years old? Cutting is something a rejected person does to dull the emotional pain of having been rejected by Mom or Dad. I dont know who rejected you but YOU do.
Your Mom...no offense, I am sure you love her but she has you wrapped all over her. You are the guilty person causing all her health problems. Doesnt that make you really important in her life? A bit TOO important?
So you studied Adolescent Psychology most likely for yourself, not a career, and no offense again, but here in the USA associates degree is spelled just so...not accociates. And if so wherever you live, well, I cant help but believe this part is a con.
You were right about an education being important and probably the most important thing you can do for yourself. Do they really say 'fer' and spell 'fer' that way for the word 'for' wherever you live?
C'mon. Get a GED, go to school for something other than anything in mental health and get educated. See woman who are responsible and are real women and not jail bait, but have real lives with real interests and know how to live a right life. If you have to register or are found guilty, take your lumps like a man and move on, you're 22 for Gods sake!
And most of all, for your belief that anyone on Y!Answers including me is going to give you a good reason for continuing on
is really naive.
You need to quit your vices, live a right life, be honest and wherever you can find free or sliding scale counselling-get it! You ran out of meds because you couldnt afford them? Job?
I wish I knew more about the cutting. It is very serious but I know it boils down to being rejected very painfully and for that I am very sorry for whatever has happened to you. But dont be sorry for yourself.
Its a hard climb out of poor mental health to good mental health. You have to make an effort. YOU have to make a very hard effort.There are plenty of examples out there that you can learn how to live right. I wish I could help you if you have a belief in God, because He will answer to a sincere heart. He comes to the aid of the hurting.
Most mentally challenged pity themselves and never climb out of the mental rut they find themselves in. Once you get off the pity pot, you will begin to heal. Look around and do what you need to to live a better life. Theres one out here for you, with your name on it, but you have to take it as it comes, not overnight.
Good luck to you man, I wish I could help you.
2006-10-06 21:55:23 · answer #3 · answered by baghmom 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You certainly have your hands full right now. Nobody could deny that.
You must take these things one at a time. If you try to assume all of this at once you will stress too much and continue to do damage to yourself and those you love around you.
First, you must stop cutting
You know this
You must stop cutting now.
Do what is necessary. Do what you did before to stop.
Remove blades from your access. Talk out loud to yourself about this. Call a counselor, if you have one. Call a friend who knows you do this. Bust yourself to someone closer to you than I am.
Your mom will be ok. The case will fall as it will - right now you cannot change that - you have to deal, that's all
Stop cutting now.
2006-10-06 21:05:42 · answer #4 · answered by Clarkie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) I don't understand your mentality. You claim you have an associates in psychology? I wasn't aware there even was an associates.
2) If you are studying to become a psychologist, why are you asking us about your problems? Shouldn't you be able to figure out what is wrong with you, or know enough to get some help?
If you really are doing this to yourself, I would suggest you pick another career, as you do not seem stable enough to be working with children who do need psych help. I know I wouldn't bring my daughter to see you if I found out you were having these kinds of problems.
Check yourself into a hospital man...
2006-10-06 21:03:32 · answer #5 · answered by iswd1 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
sounds like the chickens are coming home to roost.
Self mutilation can be a symptom of incredibly high anxiety or somehting else. if you're in as much of this as you say, get a lawyer and let the lawyer and a shrink sort it out for you. Nobody on this board can give you any real advice.
2006-10-06 21:11:52 · answer #6 · answered by huh? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
people cut becuase they are poisoning their systems,its the body trying to free itself that creates this urge check it out smoking,street drugs,prescription drugs ,alcohol all of these can cause problems.think about it these substances are poison.get clean drug free even meds.take royal jelly500mgs from healthstore this will build you up.im sure they wont throw the book at you in the scheme of things this is fairly minor.you can overcome anything if you want to.your life is far from over you are a young man and still achieve success .be strong start detoxing and begin to build the man you want to be
2006-10-07 17:18:04 · answer #7 · answered by deborah s 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
given your current situation I would suggest trying to find a public social worker to find you some counseling...if such a thing exists...try to take life one step at a time...dont let yourself get overwhelmed by the big picture...just do your best for you...things have a tendency to work themselves out in the wash if you work at it..i believe even complex issues like your facing...gl..
2006-10-06 21:04:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
get admitted for a phyc avaulation by a doctor
2006-10-06 21:40:36 · answer #9 · answered by tori 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need more help tan yahoo can give you. Seek counseling.
2006-10-06 21:09:47 · answer #10 · answered by hydroco 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋