Do opposites really attract?

Question

We do have a lot of things in common, we are both professional people, both university educated, both Catholic and both have the same goals in life. But we come from very different backgrounds. I have never drunk, he does, I have never smoked, he's trying to quit, I smoked weed once,( hated it) he isn't a pot head but he does sometimes. I come from a broken home with, save my brother, no close family ties, he comes from a loving close family.
I'm from London, never broke the law, don’t sleep around always do the right thing.
He's from Brooklyn, has somewhat of a unsavoury past (don’t know all the details yet!, he used to date a stripper!)
Sometimes his language shocks me(when the Brooklyn comes through) other times he says the most beautiful things.
He says he loves me and wants to marry me, I love him too I'm sure.
But are we too different? Is this a recipe for disaster or a happily ever after?

And please if you aren’t going to answer seriously, move along to the next question , thanks. Have a great weekend everyone.

Answer 1

magnetically, but I think people are a little more complicated.

on the other hand if he makes you happy, go with it, see where it winds up. if you find, after a while, that he still makes you happy, and you think you can live with his faults (and yes, he'll have some, we all do), then take it further...

the rest of us will be jealous in the meantime, but that's not your problem! ;-) so long as you're happy...

Answer 2

you say you love him too you are sure, But you don't sound convinced yet, your past should nor should his matter, the past is the past why look there when you building a future, happy ever after well there are no guarantees in life, you both have to work at it give 100% and settle for a little less in return, and if the lovely things come out more than the Brooklyn well ,you can always turn up the old cockney give the old east end a lash,if the Brooklyn thing comes out now and then, but you wont find the answer here you have to look in side yourself for that. there is no book on it, its an every day thing,and no two days are the same, things change people change, some times you just have to follow your heart if you don't you could still be asking yourself this question 10 years from now, but all i can say is if you love someone all the things you mentioned would not mater at all So i think you may need a little more time before you think of getting married , a few years at least. its one thing seeing someone a few days a week when they at there best for you its another thing when its 7 days a week and that goes for both of you, and you don't see his bad humor and he don't see yours, there comes a time when the rose tinted glasses wont work and that is the time when you have to work on a relationship.so as i said before if you love someone you would not have to ask this question as when you do you love them faults and all

Answer 3

Differences in two people I think make for the most of intresting times!! If two people meet and have the same things going on they will bound to get bored with each other sooner or later. I met my husband we had nothing in common.He was shy to the extreme,could not dance ,well you get the scene.I am the opposite.We made it work some how,we are never bored,we grew together,weird but it happened.We have been married for avery long time, (37 yrs)watched our two sons grow up.Its like he said he after being asked how we stayed together for so long and he said "I would rather be on a roller coaster with her,then go around on a merry go around".

Answer 4

There is no perfect person... and even those who seem perfect, time will surely reveal their negative side. Never mind the different backgrounds, what matters is your vision for your future.
This is my life: my husband smokes- I don't... he is friendly to every person he meets- I like to observe first ... it's because I grew up in a country full of prejudiced people. You guys will argue about things, but it will be because one of you will try to change the other person,... you have to accept that he is different in many ways... and you have to practice tolerance- or don't marry him if you think that you will be able to change him.... because you will be greatly disappointed. I stopped making my husband stop smoking,... it's a battle I can't win, so what I just told you about practicing tolerance is easier said than done. After two kids and surviving lots of trials and tribulations, we cuddle and hug every day, ... it's really up to you what you will make of what you guys have. Love can conquer all.
Have a nice (long) week-end, too!!!

Answer 5

with the fact that he used to date a stripper and he smokes weed (even if it's just a little bit) I would be very careful and take your time babe. These two things alone should be considered red flags in my opinion. I just hate to see women get hurt and you seem like a very sweet person so you should make absolutely sure that this guy is ready to devote himself to you completely and unconditionally. Best of luck!

Answer 6

First thing u should ask urself is if u love this person or not.
I think for any relationship to be successfull u need tp have a patience, compassion and compromising attitude toward the other person. It does not matter if ur opposite or similar minded.
If u have keep ur basics right u can have a relationship with a person u love. And nobody is perfect in this world.

Answer 7

sounds fair to me, but i missed the bit about how long you've been together, coz talking marriage comes when the time is right.

however, opposites just don't mean demographics, but also attitudes and personality.

i believe that if you feel he is right for you and vice versa then you can always work around any differences. the key is communication and honesty, nothing better for learning about someone.

you sound smitten and seriously involved, so best of luck and i hope you still support your home town football team, yeah?

Answer 8

Keep in mind that if you marry, this is the father figure and the person setting examples for your future children.
I personally dont believe in opposites attracting you need to have a lot in common to have long jeopardy it is a plus that you have the same goals in life but are you both on the same page.

Answer 9

I wish I had an easy answer. Go with your gut is all I can say. Good luck!!!

You might take a pole asking 'Who here that is married to an opposite type is happy with the result; or have an opinion about others who are opposite?'

I am married to an opposite, and the answer is nay, nay, nay. Although I love my children, and of course they wouldn't be here if we hadn't married.

Answer 10

My dear you have a lot of things in common .. you are attracted to each other because you are mainly suitable to build a family .. You are both catholic , professional and same age .. These elements classify you as similar, otherwise what do you think of my friend who is a Muslim from a backward area in Africa who is marrying a catholic white girl ( he is black) from London. Our time is mad!! Go ahead dear, belong to your boyf , do not look back and move forward.