I am a 29 y/o gay white male who is becoming more and more to realize that happiness will never be there for me. I just want to be happy. I want and need so much to have someone special in my life to share my life with, but I keep hitting rock bottom. Every guy I am interested in is scared away, mostly because I have OCD and they don't want to deal with it. I have recently fallen in love with the guy I believe in my heart to be "the one." He is not in love with me, and I am worried that he won't fall in love with me. I don't have the strenght to do this anymore. Hope is fading away, and fast. All I want to do is get out of this world and escape the hurt, the pain, the disappointment, and the unhappiness that I feel every day.
2006-10-06 11:51:48 · 31 answers · asked by Buickwagon 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
baby bless u....dont give up, please dont give up!!!....i too am gay and suffer OCD i know how hard it is especially to find that someone special who just 'gets' you....believe me if u can stay strong and know that u are a beautiful person worthy of love then it WILL get easier....you just have to learn to understand ur condition get to know it and LAUGH at it....very hard to do i know but believe me i know!!!...keep ur chin up kid, much love and laughter to you xx
2006-10-06 12:02:55 · answer #1 · answered by trixiecat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I don't believe in "hell," except the horrible things that we as humans do to each other, so I guess my answer would be "no."
But I would also suggest that suicide is never an answer. It may seem like a solution or a way out, but it is false.
You seem to be placing a huge amount of emotion on finding a life partner. Until that person comes along, is there anything wrong with cultivating a few really good friends that can help you at bad times like now?
I used to be suicidal, along the same thought lines, but I found that when I joined a few LGBT groups that had similar interests, I didn't feel so alone any more. True, it does not fill your heart completely in the same way that a partner does. But not only will it put you in a better frame of mind, but you will be meeting people who may eventually introduce you to that special someone. Why not try it?
I truly and honestly wish you good luck, and the courage to actively take steps to improve your situation.
Also, a good therapist can be one of those friends who help you through down times like these.
2006-10-06 11:57:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have always been taught that if a person commits suicide then they go to hell. But that is the least of your worries at this point...
First of all you need to realize that at 29 you still have soooo many years ahead of you. I understand that you have OCD and perhaps some other issues that you feel are hurdles at this point...they mean nothing.
My story is not the same as yours, but draw from it the truth that life does get better:
was married for 10 years to a mentally abusive individual. I had given up on love, life, and happiness. I did not consider suicide, but I had resolved myself that life got no better....
Fast forward 2 years...I woke up, grew some balls, left my husband...and now I am truly and madly in love with a person that I didnt even know existed 2 years ago...My life now, at the age of 35, is better than it has ever been. Did I EVER think that life would be good??? NO. Hang in there...trust me...without the bad, you won't know how truly lucky you are when you find the good... Hang in there friend...please believe you will find everything you are looking for...
2006-10-06 11:58:19 · answer #3 · answered by shasta 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a therapist but I think I can help.
What you need to realise is a lonely person screams "I'M LONELY!!!!" to anyone who they become romantically involved with. This internal scream does scare some people away. In order to share your life with someone, you need to first of all be happy in yourself so you won't 'need' or depend on that person to the point where they feel suffocated. This suffocation drives people away.
Your 'need' to share your life with someone shows that something is lacking in your life, and without having the benefit of knowing more about you, I can only conclude that you lack contentment and happiness. Because you lack these things, you attach yourself too quickly in a short space of time. You develop feelings for people too quickly and feel let down when these men do not feel the same way in the short space of time like you do. Their 'lack' of love for you does not mean you are being rejected, but is a signifyer that this person is not burdened with being lonely and is able to take things slower.
The reality of the situation is that this new person you met will not fall in love with you until your personal wellbeing is sorted out. you are not ready for any type of relationship right now. You have not stated what type of OCD you have but you need to speak to a specialist.
Killing yourself is not the answer. If you do that you will never find your true love!!! Take some time out for yourself and thinks things through, you will soon realise your true worth!
2006-10-06 12:11:16 · answer #4 · answered by Just me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are forgetting that re-incarnation is a reality and when a persondn commits suicide they don't escape the Hell that thet are in. there soul is going to have to come right back and face the same type of circumstances until they can rise to the occasion and deak with whatever ir is they trying to run from...(you know Catch 22), Gods plan is perfect in that none of us can escape evolving through the experience of learning to see God ( Good) in every situation. It's there if we look for it.....
2016-03-18 05:55:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, If you commit suicide you will go to hell! The Bible speaks of Judas, who betrayed Jesus. Jesus said it would of been better had he never been born, yet as Peter betrayed him and asked for forgivness, Judas killed himself. You can not repent If you are dead.
I am sorry you feel so very very sad, How ever being gay is part of your problem. The Bible is plain about you burn with lust one for another men with men and women with woman and he will turn you over to a reprobate mind, and let you believe a lie and be damned. He will let you believe what you are doing is alright, If you refuse to obey the word and come out from that life style. This is not a popular thing to say. How ever it is the TRUTH!
I hope you do not kill your self and I hope you come out of this life style. I will Pray for you. But please nothing is worth taking your life. I am sure you have much to offer the world, your family and friends would be devistated if you did such a thing and would feel guilt forever, wondering what they could of and should of done to stop this act. As long as you have breath there is hope. Don't give up. Don't sell your self short. You don't have to be alone, join things as a volunteer, help the homeless in shelters, you will see your life is not as bad as you believe right now. The sun always shines in the morning.
2006-10-06 12:06:29 · answer #6 · answered by pinkdawn 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Please don't try it. If no one else cares I do. Try finding peace with god. He will help you with what ever is going on in your life. He already knows about it so don't be afraid to discuss this with him. You may need to move to another town or somewhere else to start your life over. You may need counseling. Personally I think that it was not intended for a man to want another man. Maybe you will find your answer at a church or in the Bible. Discuss this with a preacher or a minister who knows nothing about your history. But if you believe in God why risk going to eternity unprepared. There are lots of people who do not have lovers or spouses. They have found contentment in their lives with the church people who love them. Your family cares deeply about you and this can cause so much pain for them. They will always wonder what they should have or could have done. I have heard so many family who have been destroyed by this.
2006-10-06 12:05:35 · answer #7 · answered by Busy Lady 2010 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you will go to hell committing suicide is a sin
2006-10-06 12:03:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
of course not...when ppl commit suicide because of depression they do not go to hell or are punished...depression, or the feeling of being worthless is a sickness in the mind, that "we" cannot control...its not your fault your feeling this way...dont feel like you will be punished....
its kinda like if a person has cancer...then they will go to hell??? NOOO. just because they have a sickness that they never expected to have and have no ways to control it or cure it....
so if they do pass away they will not go to hell. your depression is similar to cancer....you cant control it and cant use the right side of your mind that tells you what the RIGHT thing to do...which is LIVE LAUGH and LOVE>
the only "hell" that will occur if you commit suicide is the hell that your family memebers will live in when you are gone...
i think about suicide EVERY day ...i hate my life and i am almost always depressed....but im still here.....and its not for me its for my family....even though i know I would be HAPPIER gone...i would NEVER put my parents and sister in that situation. knowing that i put them in that kinda of pain is a MILLION times worse than hell itself.
please before you result in something drastic talk to someone get help....i am slowy reaching for help too...its takes time and it will not happen in one day.
good luck i knwo u can do it...be patient to find a love. God will answer your prayers.
2006-10-06 12:09:39 · answer #9 · answered by Angelwings87 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek psychotherapy and psychotropic medication. I think you need to get over this idea that everyone eventually finds love and lives happily ever after. Most just make do with what they have and live day to day. That's the best advice I can give. Suicide is not the answer.
2006-10-06 11:54:55 · answer #10 · answered by descartesprotege 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel that if you believe in hell then you will know if you are gonna go there or not. You don't need another person to be happy. Surround yourself with friends and keep yourself busy and one day you will find the right person for yourself. Sometimes you have to have a lot of bad things in your life in order to recognize the good things when they come. Don't kill yourself!!!!
2006-10-06 11:57:26 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋