Why is it that the last 3 times I have been interested in a guy, and they are genuinely interested in me as well, they back out at the last minute and I never hear from them? They all tell me how attractive they think I am, one even told me that he was really intimidated by me and that's why it took him forever to actually come talk to me. I know I'm not boring or stupid or anything...but when they blow me off like that I don't hear from them again! How can someone be that attracted to you, then blow you off before even knowing you? Guys why the hell do you do **** like that?
2006-10-06 06:35:10 · 26 answers · asked by trickyandmysterious 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Every guy can only speak for his own feelings so I don't know how typical mine are, but I guess they are quite typical.
The way I see it we are driven on a basic level by instinct and on a higher level by emotions then at the highest level by intelligence. the instinct is a tricky thing and to achieve its purpose, in this case procreation, it can masquerade as an emotion.
So we see an attractive woman and are tricked by our instinct into believing we love her when actually we really want sex with her. As we get to know her better the instinctual urge has been satisfied so it ceases the masquerade. If emotions genuine emotion has not yet developed then the relationship appears to have served its purpose and to be no longer necessary.
If during that time there was a special bonding then emotion kicks in and love takes over. If no love developed even liking can be a good, and sometimes even better, substitute and can keep a couple together.
Intelligence can also play a part. If people need companionship, trust and secutity then intelligence plays a bigger part in those than emotion does.
I think ladies have a different base instinct. Because they go through a reproductive process lasting 9 months instead of maybe 10 minutes I think women immediately may be more inclined to seek a long term relationship even at the subconscious basic level. By the end of the 9 months the emotional or intelligence drives have had more time to embed themselves,
Perhaps that is why men seem to be horny, insincere dogs while women generally seem to be more careful about who they fall for but when they do fall it tends to be a more genuine committment.
2006-10-06 06:56:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
3 times? Well, if it's not your looks, it's possibility something your doing to turn them off. Then again, it may be just bad luck on your part.
Best to confide to a close friend to see if you're exhuding some kind of offensive body odor. If not, then maybe it's the type of conversation you're having. Unless you are a blithering idiot, or have some kind of disgusting habit, there should be no need for you to change your ways.
Also, it depends were you meet these guys. If you go to a trashy bar, you're most likely are not going to find a good quality person.
Talking to a female friend at the moment, she tells me that these guys are probably hiding something. She experiences the same thing as well. She say that they're lying, lying, lying!!! Interesting what a sudden female opinion can be.
2006-10-06 13:48:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you this attractive woman, friendly, fun to be with, then there must be something else to it. Guys don't just drop beautiful women like that. Not to be rude, but did you sleep with them? If so, that might be the reason they didn't call back. They got what they wanted, enuff said. I hope this isn't the case, but there has to be something about you that drives guys away. Do you have a kid, or something. There must be something. Just like the ladies, a lot of guys are looking for the "right" woman to make all their dreams come true. On the other hand, don't let it get you down, that's just another man you don't have to worry about.
2006-10-06 13:42:15 · answer #3 · answered by low1sk8er 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if I saw a picture of you, then I could tell you why guys do what they do, but otherwise, I don't know. You leave many questions to be asked here, like how old are you?, do you put out in bed?, are you shallow? (not saying you are), those questions. Now I don't know you well enough to say that you are or that you do, nor do I know how old you are, but there are some guys that are just interested in the dirty little S-word and there are some that are interested in the long-term relationship thing.
Maybe it's just a string of bad luck right now. Just work through it and maybe there will be someone out there for you.
Good luck to you
2006-10-06 13:41:46 · answer #4 · answered by Michael_D_Miller 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if a guy blows you off is because they heard something from someone about you. Or it could be the fact that they feel that they really don't have a chance to sleep with you. sex is about 75% of a relationship and 10% is getting along with his/her family 10% is getting to know each other and 5% is loving a person. Now I don't know what you've heard but that is a males percentage. Also, if you have a girlfriend, she might have put some rotten egg into your game and visea-versa.
2006-10-06 13:47:55 · answer #5 · answered by james m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so, have u ever heard of guys who like being told that they are attractive, and who appears that they stay with every girl they meet...
i dont know if i explained good, but i know i do it all the time... one time i did it because friends saw me with a girl, a started to tell me that she will leave me, and that she is a *****...
another time, i just realized i'm not ready for a relationship... so in both cases, it was planned to go out for a drink, and i sayd that i have some more important work to do...
so through these exapmples think u understand...
but here is an advice that no one knew, and i regret it... when u really like a boy, insist... trust me, if hes attracted to u he will come arround sooner or later... i know i wanted, but it was too late... the problem is now, how much time are u capable of waiting for the boy's revelation...
2006-10-06 13:46:54 · answer #6 · answered by Toaster o' Death 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do they go out with you once and then turn away ? Or they never make it to the first date ? .. Maybe it is like that one guy said .. they feel intimidated by you because you are so beautiful. Try just being friends with a bunch of guys .. don't look for a "special one" .. just hang out and be with a group of them. One of them will get the nerve to ask you out eventually. Good Luck ! :)
2006-10-06 13:38:39 · answer #7 · answered by tysavage2001 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If one guy said he was intimidated by you then the rest are probably pooping bricks! Just be yourself and don't take this too seriously. Dewelling on it will make your turn bitter and that's not an attractive quality.
Remember anyone that's intimidated by you is probably so insecure you wouldn't want to be with them in the first place.
Best of luck to you.
2006-10-06 13:44:07 · answer #8 · answered by St.Anger 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well Honey, as long as you didn't Have Sex with them, Don't worry about those Airheads...... Now if you did, you should expect that.... Most guys are only out for one thing.... Some aren't....
Some guys won't approach you because they think that you are too sophisticated, and they know they have to come correct... and most guys can't come correct... So You have to, when you see someone that you may be intersted in, you go up to them and strike up a conversation... Be a WOMYN hear us Roar....
2006-10-06 13:45:32 · answer #9 · answered by Ms Bea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe them blowing you off is from the lack of you blowing them off????
Immature men cannot handle a dominant woman that is both intellectually superior then them and has more balls then them....when in doubt use the dumb blonde routine!!!
Then again I have no qualms myself and truly enjoy the challenge of taming this shrew.
2006-10-06 13:37:47 · answer #10 · answered by Paul M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋