How do I give 110% to a girl again?

Question

I'm a very good looking, young, financially secure guy, who has given his all in the last 2 relationships. Both of them lasted 1-3 years. I'm very romantic and loving, but I just don't know if I can give 110% again and end up with a woman who treats me like sh*t. Any words of encouragement from the females out there would be greatly appreciated....

Thank you everyone who has given me constructive answers! It was much needed.

Answer 1

Hi Ken,
I understand where your coming from, I too have had two long term relationships that went down the drain. I feel the same way you do,I know that my marriage of 19yrs went down hill due to cheating and so forth. When I met my second love as I will call him, I did it everything I could to keep this relationship from ending. I took on most of the bills,made sure I tried everything to make him happy.I gave up alot of who I was for 7yrs.He cheated me as well! So, I'm thinking the same as you, why try again?? I can only give you advice that I would give myself and that is....Just be yourself you can't help it if you are a giving caring person, I know that's how I am! I think if your not looking you will find someone who is like you. People rush into relationships for whatever reason,sometimes loneliness kicks in and you would rather have someone then wait until the right someone comes along. But I think we should wait get to know people, we are all born with different treats. We have seem alot growing up,things we remember and things we don't. In our absent mind we have characters we remember. These are the people we are attracted too. An aunt,uncle maybe people they were married to or dated, Our parents, we learn from their relationships and glean from them good or bad. I think recognizing these are sometimes very difficult. That's why we wined up in relationships that are toxic. I'm a therapist and I still trying to figure people out. The best advice I can give you, is look within yourself, know what you want right? be honest,upfront and maybe you can weed out the bad. BUT!!! Most of all listen to your gut this is very important, if you doesn't feel right, its not right. I'm sure you are a smart man.....you will know when its the right fit when she comes along!!!....Good Luck...Peace

Answer 2

You may be missing something about yourself.

What you need to do is get a friend that is a girl.

Maybe someone that is married or a girl that you know will not lead to a relationship.

Then ask this girl what you could do better about yourself to make you more someone would want to stay with.

It might be something simple.

I knew a lady that left her husband because he had really bad breath. She tried to hint for a few years. Tried to get them to brush, floss, and set up dental apts. for a another year.

Then told him once very nice and he blew it off saying he would brush later. She told him a few other times and he started to get mad about it instead of listening.

In the end she just could not stand to be around him.

She said it smelled like a cross between rotten flesh and poop when he would be talking to her.

Anyway, to this day he does not know that she loved him and it was just his non concern about her feelings that cause her to pull away.

Only someone that has nothing to lose will be honest with you.

Answer 3

don`t give 110% unless you receive it. some girls want a partner and a partner gives 50% and the other gives 50%. in a relationship you need to be equal. never make a girl want you because of what you can do for them but for what you are with them. it may just have been the wrong girl. if they weren`t then you`d be together now. she`s out there just give it time and you`ll find her. remember everything happens for a reason.

Answer 4

Whether a guy wants to hear it or not, women love a challenge. I am not saying to treat the net girl like S**T but be less available leaves them craving for more. Distance makes the heart grow fonder and the challenge is on. Good luck.

Answer 5

You can tell right away when a girl really likes you for you. She'll do anything and wont make any excuses. She has to be mature if you want it to last because some young girls just wanna have fun!
Don't worry, you are a good guy and some lucky lady will see that soon. ;)

Answer 6

I agree with the people that say be yourself. If it is meant to be, the girl will be able to get 110% out of you and enjoy it and cherish it. Also, find people that you trust and respect and get their advice about your relationship. They can sometimes see things that you cannot because you are too close to the situation. I hope this helps.

Answer 7

Be yourself. If youre the kind of guy that gives 100% in your relationships, then do that. If youre tired of doing that and dont think you have that left to give, then give what you've got, that's still you, it's just you now. If youre anything else other than who you are and you meet the girl of your dreams, then it's like you've lied to her or something.

Answer 8

If you don't give a relationship your all you might lose the one who really loves you. However, if you are ending up in bad relationship then it has something to do with the kind of women you are choosing to date!

Answer 9

You just havent found Ms Right yet, shes out there. Everyone is different and there are so many girls out there that would treat you like gold! Dont give up!

Answer 10

haha I like evan's answer. the first one's funny too. my advice is to have sex with as many people as possible and not worry about giving 110% of yourself. quote that from cruel intentions