I'm looking for tips from work at home moms. What kind of routine do you use to balance chores, kids, & work?

Question

I have a three year old at home with me during the day, and I feel like I'm always shooing him away to get my work done, but it's counter-productive because it makes him even clingier. The hubby and school age kids look at me like I've been eating bon bons all day since the house isn't any cleaner than when they left in the morning. Daycare isn't an option until I'm actually making money with this new endeavor, and kind of defeats the purpose of working at home anyway. I know there is a way to get it all balanced, I just need some guidance and practical advice from someone who's got it going on. Thanks!

Thanks everyone for some helpful tips. I'm kind of doing a conglomeration of all of it, so evidently I'm on the right track. I'm also going to negotiate a day with Grandma so that I have a kid-free day to really concentrate on work.
Nanny - I would love to spend the entire day playing with and teaching my children. I would also like to feed them and keep a roof over their heads. To try and lay a guilt trip on me or any of the countless other moms who are struggling to balance work and family, happiness and survival, is judgemental and insulting. We all have to do the best we can with what we've got. Your ID of Nanny suggests that you are paid to watch someone else's kids. Don't let your negative impressions of your employer make you think you're better than the rest of us moms. Most of us are working our jobs AND cleaning our houses AND caring for our children AND caring for our aging parents, etc. I'm sorry, but we just don't have any spare time to join you on your pedestal.

Answer 1

That really depends on what your job is, but I'll give it my best shot here :-)

First things first. Kids up and dressed, eat breakfast, kids off to school, ect.

Second, get your son situated. Maybe gate off a room and make it "his play room" while you work. Have a small tv in the room and have it on Nick Jr. (or whatever shows he likes) and put a beanbag chair, his favorite toys, ect. in it so he can keep busy but you can keep an eye on him and know where he is. Have him in his "play room" while you are working, and let him out to roam and play while you clean. Have him help you clean as well even if that only means he's putting away a few toys. When you're cleaning, start in one end of the house and work your way to the other. Don't dart back and forth between rooms, just start in one room and get it clean and move on to the next. Another time saver would to start giving the older kids maybe 2 small chores a day (or 3 depending on how old they are). Tell them they have until a certain time (maybe before dinner or before 7 pm) to get it done. After you've gotten a few things clean then you can go back to work again for awhile. Pop in a video for the little one and give him a small snack and he should be good to go.


Anyway, I hope that helped. Good luck and God bless

Answer 2

I am a stay at home mom, and yes it is really hard to do all that is needed. Right next to your desk maybe you could have a desk for your three yr. old. They can play office with you. Have there pretend computer or just some coloring books, their own office supplies. That way they are next to you and maybe they won't be so clingy. If they have a t.v. playing, maybe some earphones for your child, so you don't get distracted. You need to stick to a set schedule, yes it takes effort, but in the long run it will pan out. I think you need to talk to your family about your feelings, and they should try to understand, it is a group effort. Why don't you make crock pot meals, it cooks while you work. We have a chart where my children have a schedule of chores they need to do to help out. Just because they go to school, doesn't mean they have no chores. When we grow up, we work, we come home, we still work. That is life. Well I hope it turns out for you.

Answer 3

When I started my business at home so I could be a stay at home mom, seriously I didn't get any business work done. I did get housecleaning and stuff like that done as it's easy to include the child (takes longer though), and teach them at the same time you're getting things done. But as for the business, I had to do that when I could totally concentrate, at nap time and evenings, early morning. If you're trying to be a stay at home mom, then that's your first priority, even though you're wanting to center on your business. Unfortunately, that probably just won't happen. If your child doesn't have your attention during the day, then daycare would probably be funner, safer and more fulfilling anyway. Not that you have to be with your child 24/7, but you really won't be able to concentrate on anything business-wise with a toddler around. My older sister and her husband raised a child until preschool at their business, but they worked together and could share the responsibilities, they also had office help that tended to look after the kids when necessary. I ended up moving my office out of the house to the business district and putting my little ones in daycare. Sucks and I feel guilty, but that was the only way I could get anything done and make $$ at my own business which is flourishing. So are the kids, they love daycare, but I still feel guilty and wish I could be home.

Answer 4

I thought my 4 month old would be easy, but it is so hard to get things done! I use the exersaucer and the baby einstine to give myself at least 30 minutes uninterrupted. You could try to make a video routine,maybe close to naptime when he is more tired. Set the stage, tell him what you expect, give him a special spot, let him choose the DVD of the day, and then tell him you are going to work and he can't talk to you unless he is hurt or the DVD is over. Then you cna get started and follow up during nap time. Make nap time a must too. My friend of 2 and 4 year olds tell them they will have to be in their room on their bed for the nap hour. Sometimes they sleep, sometimes she has to go in several times and remind them, but mostly this is the routine and they accept it. Three year olds thrive on routine. It just takes a while for them to learn it! Good luck!

Answer 5

You shouldn't be "shooing" your kid away from you - isn't that the reason you wanted to stay home? To raise him? That should be your first and only priority - spending time with him, playing with him, teaching him and enjoying every minute with him!

Answer 6

you can do your business and chores while the child is sleeping and watching tv, best time for business early morning hours till the child wakes up. you can do chores and some business also when he naps just check on him every half hour.

Answer 7

put them in bed early and stay up late, + work during naptimes.. thats the only way i ever get anything done.

Answer 8

Schedules are important because they help you to establish a routine. This routine will help you to get what you need to get done as well as ensure that your children are getting the attention and love that they need. It also helps the kids because once you establish a routine, they will know that Mommy is coming back to play with them again as she does every day like clockwork.
I am going to share my schedule. This routine may not work for you but perhaps you can tweak it to meet you personal agenda.
·*8:00 am As soon as you wake up get showered and dressed. This may be obvious and strange to read for some. However, there are many of us that end up putting this off until later in the day. I personally find that if I get this done right off the bat my day goes much smoother. Not to mention, I am presentable should someone come to the door!
·*9:00am After breakfast do something active! Walk, dance, or go to the park. This will give you the exercise you need to keep your body healthy and it will tucker out your little ones as well. You may be tempted to get on the computer before doing this but don’t! You may never end up logging off!
·*10:30am Now that your child is fulfilled for the moment, fix them a mid morning snack and throw in a load of laundry. Don’t fold or put away, but just switch your loads. Now at least you have that done. While your children are enjoying their snack and relaxing spend about an hour working. They will be content to play quietly for a bit now. It helps if you have a timer set for yourself so you know when to stop. This is difficult but when the timer goes off you must wrap it up!!
·*11:30am Spend an hour or so doing your household chores. You may really need to vacuum or change sheets. Do this now but let your children participate so you are still spending quality time with them.
·*12:30pm Fix your children lunch. As they eat sneak in about 20 minutes or so of work.
·*1:00pm After lunch do a quiet activity with your children. Read to them or color. Better, yet start them on a craft or Color forms. Spend about a half hour with them doing this. Again, afterwards they will be content to continue on their own for a while.
·*1:30pm You can now devote another hour or so to your work.
·*2:30pm When this hour is up, complete any household chores that need doing like dishes, bill paying, appointment making, or starting dinner. Again, let your children participate and make it fun. If you are paying bills, give them some envelopes to color or some junk mail to sort through. If you are doing dishes let them “help.” It is always tempting to just get these tasks done as quickly as possible by ourselves. We get more done that way. However, we then miss out on precious moments with our babies. Soon enough, they’ll have no interest in taking part in these activities. Soon enough, the house will be spotless again.
·*3:30pm Give your children a light snack such as carrot sticks or rice cakes and allow them to watch a half hour of TV. You can now wrap up whatever you have been working on all day business wise.
·*4:00pm Wrap up the housework- fold the clothes, clean up toys, or wash the windows in one room- whatever needs doing that day. Then move on to making dinner. Remember to let your little ones help! If possible while dinner is cooking, take your children out in the yard for a bit. Blow some bubbles, collect leaves, whatever suits their fancy. Try and see the world through their eyes, as magical, and let yourself decompress a bit.
·*5:30pm- Now it’s the dinner rush. Serve the meal, eat, clean up, and do bath times.
·*7:30pm- Cuddle up and read some stories as a family or watch a movie. Even though you have a million things going on in your mind that must be done, just let it go for now and enjoy.
·*9:00pm- Once the children are in bed, you can get back to working, if you like, uninterrupted for a few hours. Or, you can give yourself the night off and just relax. You do deserve it! After all you have given your children three and a half hours of undivided attention (not including the time they spend “helping” you), at least three hours to business, and three hours to housework!
I have actually made similar schedules now for each day of the week. For example, Mondays may include grocery shopping. Tuesdays I might do the bill paying. Wednesdays might be craft day with the kids while Thursdays are park outings. Business wise, I may concentrate on promotion on certain days and writing on others. I find that in following this schedule, I get much more done than when I go about my day without a plan. Do I always adhere to it? No! Being a mom requires flexibility. Things change at the drop of a hat. If a little one gets sick, there goes the work for that day. Still, it is good to have a schedule to fall back on and refer to especially when you feel lost and don’t know where to start. I know it is difficult to submit a routine especially when you are focused and wanting to work uninterrupted. What helps me with this is constantly writing things down and keeping a list of what I need to do. If a brainstorm hits me when I am playing with my daughter, I’ll run over to my notebook and jot it down for later. It is also frustrating, if you are a perfectionist, to never really be “done” with anything, to not be able to start a task and just see it through to the end. Instead, with this routine, we jump from task to task to task. However, I find this works better for my daughter and, truthfully, for me too. There were many weeks where I got tons of work accomplished but the house was falling apart. Or sadly, where I was not spending enough quality time with my little girl. This routine helps to create a balance. Instead of playing only role fully, we play all of our roles as much as possible. With only 24 hours in the day and at least 3 full time jobs (work, parent, and housekeeper, if not more) this may be the best we can hope for!