Any advice on stopping back talk and curse words from an 11 year old girl. She gets angry over nothing.?

Question

She has very privileged life. Second year at a new school. Father is weekend only (he commutes).

Answer 1

@11,
I have 3 girls ages 3, 7, and 10
There is no excuse for that kind of behavior form a 11 year old. Besides parents make a huge mistake in not punishing a child due to what they think are legit reasons to misbehave.
If you really want this to stop, each and every time your daughter does ANY of what you explained, calmly pull down her pants and spank her bottom red, make sure dad is on board and does the same when she tries this behavior with him. start doing this each and every time and you will see results.
If you two present a united front, YOU WILL WIN.
Good Luck


PS
I was assuming this is your daughter, if not then you should not be spanking her, SORRY, but that has to be dad's job.

I do agree with the person who says dad needs to be more involved. Little girls need there daddy's oh so much.

Answer 2

First - I will not assume this child is your daughter. Sounds to me like she is spoiled and angry. Dad isn't there and she is at a new school. A couple items I'd suggest to discuss when she is calm.

1) Talk to her about her anger toward mom and dad. Why isn't dad there? How does this affect her feeling of self-esteem and self worth?

2) What is going on at this new school? Is she being bullied?

Now, I am a firm believer in DISCIPLINE!! I do spank my son and I was spanked as a child and I am fine. I also believe in taking away all privileges. Don't send them to a room filled with TV, computers and videos. Punishment should be boring. Make her read the newspaper or something. Be firm and don't lose it with her. Just be firm in the punishment. The parent is the parent. Not the friend!

Next - Don't give her so many "things". Children truly don't desire a bunch of stuff. They desire the love and time of their parents.

I am only suggesting these things if you have this type of influence over her. You may not be able to enforce discipline and if not make suggestions to the mom.

Lastly - If there is swearing in the house EVERYONE must stop. Parents can't complain of kids swearing but they do it. The kids get that from the parents sometimes.

I hope my suggestions help.

Answer 3

Sorry but daddy needs to be there more than just the weekends. Find a solution. Move. Daddy finds a new job. Make it happen that Daddy is home more than just the weekends. That's probably the reason for the backtalk. Children need both parents significantly involved in their child's lives. Look at the generation of children the "hands off" approach has provided.

Your tone gives the impression that you hate this child, which frankly repulses me. You don't say "Any advice on stopping back talk from my 11 year old daughter/step daughter," you say instead "an 11 year old girl." You take no ownership and don't even acknowledge she's more to you than just an 11 year old girl.

Your entire family could do with extensive therapy.

Answer 4

Whatever you decide on as a punishment you need to discuss this with her before there is a situation where you need to enforce the new punishment. Then when a situation does occur simply put the punishment into effect. Whatever you do though, do not yell or get angry!!
Simply state that the punishment was discussed, she knew the consequences and chose to accept them. Right now your daughter is feeling out of control and is seeking to control you by pushing your buttons. Let her know that is not a possibility anymore and refuse to engage her when she's angry. This will resolve in a few weeks as long as you're 100% clear and consistent with her but you can't show the slightest sign of irritation, frustration, or weakness even when you're at your wit's end. Good Luck!!

Answer 5

WOW! i understand area of it probable has to do with the actuality you and her mom are no longer mutually. the different area has to do with the infant sister. In my abode, we've a 12 and four 12 months previous women. the older one gets an concepts-set with the infant, and he or she's constantly getting into hassle. i'm attempting extremely no longer elementary to get removed from asserting the infant is little and lovable and the great you may actually be a function variety. maybe she feels there is alot of tension on her to be the sturdy female and the infant gets each and all of the attention, whether its damaging interest. And your 11 12 months previous-it appears like that's what she's doing. Are freinds allowed to come back over? Is she allowed to bypass to chum's abode, Do you or her mom ever get to do issues with basically the 11 12 months previous without the 4 12 months previous the infant in the way. specially situations they want the guy. while my daughter replace into born, i felt like the older one replace into older than what she extremely replace into. actuality is she replace into basically 7 and now she's 12 yet in a fashion she's nevertheless somewhat baby. try doing issues with the aid of your self with basically her. self-discipline the infant while she does something incorrect. Watch television along with her, take her out. If she does not do something incorrect, do no longer carry it up. Don' be a relentless reminder of ways disillusioned you're in her. She is likewise going throughout the pre-teen/teen hormonal element. My daughter did from approximately 8-10 after which it jsut stopped.

Answer 6

Stripe her room of everything. Leave only a bed, one pillow and one blanket. No TV, no phone, no computer, nothing. When she is able to display acceptable behavior then you can slowly and carefully reinstate privileges and give back the items you once removed. The important thing here is to make sure she understands what is and is not acceptable behavior, and with privilege comes responsibility. Good Luck.

Answer 7

You are probably going to get a lot of criticism for your parenting skills....I am not judging. You have to be firm and consistent. If you believe in discipline or removal of privileges then say you are going to do it and if the behavior doesn't stop and stick to your guns! It is hard to make an eleven year old understand the concept of being disrepectful to their parent but you should try to make them understand anyway.

Answer 8

hmmm. The problem is the privilaged life. You need to set boundaries and punishments for crossing those boundaries, and then stick to them. Be the parent, not a friend. If you punish and she tantrums and screams and yells and cusses, punish some more. Have some thick skin. Be the parent.

Answer 9

Give her an extra big hug and hold on to her until she calms down. If she backtalks or cusses she gets a soppy hug. That way there is more contact and love and she will drop her level of anxiety and uneasyness proportionally to rising her level of accepting and getting to like the hugs. This technique will make her stop to think what she is doing while she is being embraced. If she struggles, hold on for as long as you can, then she can realize what she is rebelling against is not for her independence but against the love of those that are there for her

I hope it helps

Answer 10

Well, I suggest you take her to a psychiatrist.

Please don't think she's too young, maybe she's frustated and needs counseling, even maybe anger management would be the solution and that kind of solution will be given only by a specialist.