Home education - does anyone have any experience of this?

Question

I am worried about my childrens education within the inner city state school system when they reach secondary school. Not only what they learn in class but what they pick up from other children in the playground. I am not an over protective parent I am just looking at alternatives.

Answer 1

I am a label hater, lol. Its almost as if caring for your children and wanting the best for them is too often considered being "over protective"! The kind of socialization that runs rampant in the school system is NOT the kind of socialization that children need. I'm so sick of people acting as if every child in the public education system is an outgoing, fun-loving, joyful person, with tons of friends, many have no friends and there are more kids watching on the sidelines than there are enrolled in sports!. There are plenty of what people consider shy, weird, introverted, strange, etc. children in the public school system. Notice that the 12yo child mentioned by one poster as recently pulled out of school is "shy" and "doesn't like to mingle with people his own age"..."How is that possible?" one must ask, after all, he just came fresh out of the public school system. Apparently those previous 6 years of practice didn't change his demeanor and if he was able to function with peers in school, then why the trouble socializing now and so soon after being pulled out of school? According to naysayers, this is contrary to the behavior of one with experienced school socialization. The kid is getting picked on and his self-esteem is going down and she should keep him in for the soul reason of "socialization"? Sorry, that is just ridiculous. The child is better off at home with a loving and caring adult who will build up their self-esteem, that will more than prepare a child for the world after school.

I suggest you go to this site: http://www.naturalchild.org/articles/learning.html And read everything you can about socialization and learning, this site is awesome and has had a positive effect on our home-schooling experience. In order to begin successfully, one must learn to get rid of stereo-types and the "peer" pressure that society puts on people regarding children.

I am unapologetic in how we raise our children, and our children are not in a bunch of different activities. We visit friends, we do things in our area, my 8yo dd is in gymnastics, both my 8 yo dd and 12 yo dd chose to enroll in a public school science class once a week, we volunteered to adopt a grandparent, we do fun things on our own as a family, and that is it. My 12 yo has no interest in any sports at this time, he lifts weights with dad, swims, plays, etc. for his "exercise". My 8yo dd had never, until this years science school enrollment, stepped foot in any type of school setting and despite not being in something every night of the week or even in a bunch of group activities...fits in just perfectly. She has actually been defending her new friends from teasing and after only 2 days of being there was trading lunches, playing with other children at recess, participates as a TEAM player with her group, talks with her new friends and acquaintances and other things that "schooled" children partake in.

My 12 yo has only been home educated for four years. Before that, he was in both public and private schools. Our son has always been a bully magnet, we believe it is because he just is not a mean-spirited child, he is very kind and considerate and has a sweet nature. Anyway, this is his first year in any type of "school" setting since being yanked from private school and he has had no problems with socializing either and in fact, has been the object of bullying again, only this time...the bully got a lesson. It happened yesterday when this kid was continually elbowing him hard in the rib cage and arm. My ds told him to knock it off or he'd be sorry. After ample warning my son took him down with the kids face in the floor, knee in the back. My ds was punished for an hour and the other kid was punished for the whole day because everyone in the class saw who it was that started the whole thing. At the end of the day the boys apologized to each other (without teacher intervention) and on the car ride home my son was upset because he had made the other child cry. We did not punish him because he had tried to get the other child to stop before using force. I doubt that the other child will bully our son anymore and seeing how over 60 children witnessed the incident, I'm sure that anyone considering bullying our son will think twice, lol. Our son learned how to handle mean children by living in our neighborhood. He chooses not to hang around them and he especially doesn't like to hang with those in our neighborhood who are two-faced. One older boy came and knocked on the door a couple months back and asked our son to play to which our son replied, "No. When we're alone we have fun but when your other friends come around, you treat me like a dumb ***!" If that makes our hs son stand-out then that is just the kind of standing out that to us, is a good thing.

Despite not going to school regularly both of my children made friends immediately, some people make friends easier than others and some children are shy; I argue that it is in some peoples nature to be outgoing and others to be shy and therefore to blame the shy behavior on lack of socialization is wrong.

Sorry for the long post, I just wanted to give a balanced view on socialization since that is the number one hang-up most naysayers constantly bring up. According to them it'd have been more typical for my never schooled, not in every activity under the sun daughter to be in the corner of her class, shaking in fear because she is around "GASP" other kids her own age! It really is silly.

Please check out your state laws at http://hslda.org to get started. Do not contact your school district as they usually will give misinformation, whereas the Home school Legal Defense Association, has the laws for homeschooling by state.

You shouldn't feel like you need to state that you are not being over protective. Unabashedly protect your child, they are a parents most precious gift, so what if you want to ensure their health, happiness and education?

Good luck in making your decision.

Answer 2

I have home schooled my children from the begining. They did not get the oppurtunity to go to public school in our area because I saw the pain and heartache my brother and sister went through with the schools here. My mom homeschooled them for a while but had to stop due to a divorece. So I knew when I had my children that public school was not an option and I had seen home schooling in action.

It is wonderful to have the oppurtunity to home school. The pro's heavily outway the cons, in my opinion. You get to pick what they get taught, teach them what you think is right (Ex. I am a Christian so we teach both Creationism and Big Bang/Evolution and then we compare the these theories etc..in public school my kids wouldnt even hear the word Creationism) You get to pick your schedule, take a day off when needed without having to provide someone with a ton of documentation. Also if you have a great teacher and a student that tries (shouldn't be a problem right?) then the children usually end up being well ahead of where the public school system is. Home schooled children have the same or better odds of attending colleges, if thats a concern for you.

But you absolutely must stick with it.

I don't pay a lot of attention to people who say "but they are going to miss out on social oppurtunities" blah blah wah wah

My children are heavily involved with the church, scouts, and local sports. They are not missing out on social skills and I get to see what they are picking up from other children and nip bad behavior in the bud right then and there.

It is a big desicion not to be taken lightly, please do a a lot of research, especailly state laws about it. Research curriculums heavily also and make sure its what you want to be teaching. Its a tremendous commitment and its not for everybody.

And I am sure there is a ton of local support groups and what not for your area.

Best of luck,
Steph

Answer 3

I home schooled my 15 y/o son last year for 9th grade. I had no prior experience and am not a teacher....do not remember all that I did learn. We used Abeka with all classes on DVD and all tests with teacher books. I sooooo enjoyed this and so did my son. He matured a lot and was relaxed at home. I sent him to a regular christian school this year and he is fitting in quite well. I would do the same thing again as it eased us both into the secondary school better. This is a great alternative although the biggest drawback is their social learning. If you can get them involved in activities with other kids you will not lack there either. Good luck....there is nothing wrong with protecting your kids.

Answer 4

You are not alone! I am in the same boat and have no answers as yet other than to hope my son can get into a selective school. We have one state secondary in our town which is an amalgamation of five old schools and takes all children in the area. You can imagine what the reputation is like. I have seriously thought about the home-school option so will be interested to read some of the answers you receive. Let's hope they're positive ones eh?!

Answer 5

Hi Lucy,
I want to encourage you to continue researching home education. I feel the more you learn, the more you will want to home school your children. You are definately not over protective!!! The things they learn on the playground as well as the things they learn in the classroom are worth worrying over.

Find a homeschool support group in your area and take your kids to a meeting. That's when mine decided that they definately wanted to school at home.

As for the shy young boy mentioned by another poster. I don't think he has a socialization issue, but I am sure (as a shy kid) he would have issues in public school. I had issues because of my public school experiences. Here's some writings on the web by John Taylor Gatto (mentioned by another poster) http://www.preservenet.com/theory/Gatto.html
I wish you the very best in your adventure. P~

Answer 6

I have had no experience personally, but a friend of mine has choosen to home school her son, due to him being bullied and the fact that their are no decent state schools in her area (and can't afford private education).

I understand from her that after the initial 'settling in' period in which her and her son (aged 12 then) were finding their feet and getting used to the new routine, that it has been very successful. There are home schooling forums that she has joined and they meet up for field trips & socials, so her son doesn't miss out in that area. He is certainly excelling in science and mathematics, and is well on course to gain all his GCSE's. However, I worry about his lack of contact with other children (despite weekend clubs), he is a lovely lad but very quiet and sometimes is unwilling to mix with others his age. Of course, this is just my opinion of him and it may be that he'd have been a shy lad regardless of where he is educated.

I think home education should definitely be considered. We recently moved areas so that my daughter could have a choice of primary schools when the time comes. If that had not been a possibility for us and we'd stayed in our previous area, I would've seriously considered private or home education.

Good luck with whatever you decide

Answer 7

I home school all three of my children. They have not been to public school. I like home schooling them and they seem to like it also. In my experience, YES! Homeschooling does work.

Keep up the research so you can decide if home schooling is the best choice for your family. I would also suggest trying to find a group of homeschoolers in your area so you can talk face to face with someone. You can normally find a group by word of mouth. Ask a pastor or librarian if they know of anyone. You may also try the local YMCA, they often offer PE for homeschoolers.

Good luck in your Quest to find out what is best for your children.

Answer 8

I home schooled my two for Key Stage 3 and I wish now I had kept them for their GCSEs as well. It is quite possible, you need to work around the idea of 4 hours schooling a day which can include all sorts of things such as cooking, mapreading, shopping, banking, planning travel and reading bus timetables etc.

The most useful thing I can tell you is that we used Core Science 1 (and 2 for the later year) which covers the entire syllabus for KS3 Biology, Physics and Chemistry - no experience required! ISBN: 0521588502 available from amazon.

Answer 9

There are at least 1 million, some say 2-3 million, children in the US being homeschooled. You are certainly not alone in your interest and your concern about the school system.

I'm in my 4th year homeschooling. It's been great. My dh teaches junior high and I used to teach elementary. We see what the environment is like in school and how limiting the educational approach can be. We decided that we were prepared to take on the task of teaching them ourselves. We have no regrets and our kids love it.

Answer 10

I am planning to homeschool my children. They are pre-schoolers now though, so I have no thoughts for you specifically regarding secondary school.

The more I read about homeschooling though, the more I am convinced it is the way to go for us. There are loads of web sites and books out there. I particularly like the authors John Taylor Gatto and John Holt. I believe there is quite a strong UK homeschooling movement ; one good website is www.free-range-education.co.uk

I also have a wee bit of personal experienceof being homeschooled myself. I was homeschooled for a year by my father when I was 10 - we were travelling for that year. It was a very positive experience. Quite pivotal for me actually. When I did go back to school I was years ahead of my age group and my mind was really broadened.

All the best, these are big decisions!

Answer 11

i home school a 7th,8th,and 9th grader and it can be rough at times but my children were in public school until this year and we nothing but trouble. the teacher has got to where they don't care and they are scared of there students and it should be the other way around. now my children are singing in church, getting into the services more and all three are Christians. we are in a holiness church and the home schooling thing just fits our life style.I'm going through alpha omega home school.www.alphaomega.com look at the web site good luck!