I have known this girl for a year. We go for drinks together. I am really good mates with her best friend. She has told me she enjoys my company but when I made my feelings known to her she said she wants to stay friends because I had planned to go back to South Africa soon. When I changed my plans to stay she didn't change her views. Whats going on?? She still phones me almost everyday. Yesterday we both used up about £10 quid each texting and talking to each other. I am really confused!!! Has anyone been through something similar because she is ripping my heart to shreds....
2006-10-05 22:07:46 · 18 answers · asked by mbaker_713 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you gotta be patient...besides you should not hurry love...or intimate relationships....when she told you she wants your friendship and nothing else...respect it....the more we see guys respect us....we're in a trap that we could fall for the guy...especially when a guy always thinks and considers our point of views or decisions....what you can do is....give her the chance to discover things herself about you....at least now you have made your feelings known....so be still and prove it to her...but when time doesn't come for you to be more than friends....you got to move on...and really wait for the real one. Just preserve what you got for her...if not with her...for the one coming! ;)
2006-10-05 22:32:29 · answer #1 · answered by maic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's confused. Give her time, if you can. Or you can try and use this trick I gave some of my guy friends. Get a girl friend to help you with this. When you guys go out as a group, bring this girl friend with you. If this girl that you like started acting weird (best if you know how to read body language) it means she likes you a lot! If she's acting normal, keep in mind that most girls can act better than Jennifer Aniston (no offence). Talk to her later on the phone and ask her what she thinks of your "date". If she gives the "whatever" attitude - this usually comes in words like "i don't know" or "she's ok, i guess" - that means you are still in the game. If not, I'm afraid I have bad news for you: When she said she only wants to be friends with you, She meant that literally. And if that is the case, the reason why she still phones you everyday is because she treats you like one of her girlfriends. And if that is the case, then be like any regular man. Ignore her for a while. That would work too.
2006-10-05 22:26:13 · answer #2 · answered by Eury Peima 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like-
1) Shes scared that becoming a couple will ruin the relationship you have as friends which she obviously values highly.
) She is insecure with the fact that you may still be heading back to SA in the near future.
Firstly, let her know you are here for good, if that is the case, and see how things go for a while. Then, if nothing romantically happens, have a good chat about how you feel and try ASK her how she feels.
A softly softly approach is required though, dont forget, and good luck.
2006-10-05 22:14:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She obviously likes being around you but you have to determine now whether its as your friend or your girlfriend, Try wooing her show her what a gentleman you are and offer to take her out for a drink and if you feel comfortable at that time tell her you would like more than friendship, some times its hard pretending that all you want is friendship cos that's what the other person wants you are pretending for them but hurting yourself go for it i bet she dont know what shes missing as you obviously have deep feelings for her.
Goodluckx
2006-10-05 23:35:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she is scared that if she gives her heart to you, you may end up missing home too much and still go back. Dont push her just be yourself and let things develop slowly. If you are planning on staying here for a long time then tell her that too!
I lost a wonderful love who returned back to SA and it broke my heart!!!
2006-10-05 22:14:25 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the best thing to do is take the bull by the horns and ask her, i know this is hard but at least you will know ,it sound to me there is a lot of foreplay in the sense of chat and she is porbably on here to to asking the same quetion
go for it you have nothing to lose
good luck
2006-10-05 22:14:17 · answer #6 · answered by jopink79 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that there definatley is something there. If I were you, then text her telling her your not going away, and ask her how she feels about that. If she is extatic or similar, ask her if she would like to go for a meal sometime. then ask her. Good luck hunni!
2006-10-05 22:12:43 · answer #7 · answered by xMwahahahahahahax 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont use £10 texting someone you havent got feelings for - she definitely likes you as more than a friend.
but maybe there's some other reason she doesn't want to get together with you, so tread very carefully.
2006-10-05 22:14:57 · answer #8 · answered by monkeynuts 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you want my advice she wants you to 'chase' her she likes that kind of attention she wants you to beg!
DO NOT chase her be super cool and let her chase you, if iam right she will after a while panic she will be confused at first and i do think she does like you.
back off a bit, then watch her come running if she doesnt then she is not that keen.
for help on personality types check out this web site see if you can spot yourself and her!
http://www.9types.com its wicked!
2006-10-05 22:50:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
and she might be laughing about it with her friends. Get busy with someone else where she can see if she gets jealous then she's into you otherwise she is playing you and enjoying it. Ask her to fix you up with somebody see what she does preferably someone she does not knoiw but has contact with.
2006-10-05 22:15:52 · answer #10 · answered by icheeknows 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋