How come guys will constantly flirt with a girl, become friends with her, call her beautiful, and seem like they like her, yet never ask her out and go for another girl instead?
2006-10-05 16:49:59 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Men are simple creatures..
They follow the path of least resistance..
Either become that path, or wait until teenage years are over, thus acquiring the wisdom to understand the futility of your question..
:-)
2006-10-05 16:55:22 · answer #1 · answered by Andreba 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
SLOW DOWN!! How do you know that they're becoming friends with the girl? Over the years I have found that there is a major difference between the that guys define "becoming friends" and girls define "becoming friends". I don't know about the rest of the persons of my gender, but simply because I heap compliments, flirt with her, etc doesn't mean that I'm attempting to become friends with an attractive girl. If I were to do that with the intent of trying to become friends, I'd be going totally against my own nature. I become friends with people (regardless of which sex) by just plain talking to them, telling jokes, etc. Before I even determine that the girl is my friend, I have to "test" her. How does she react when I'm in the room? If her reaction is different when another guy enters the room, I'm not her friend.
It gets complicated when girls think the guy is trying to become a friend when actually, they're being tested by the guy. Like a three-year-old will test his/her parent(s) to see how far they can go, that's how guys test girls. What does she agree with? How gross or distasteful a joke can she take before she "up and leaves"? Interests MUST be alike before friendship can be assumed. Assumptions are 50/50.
2006-10-06 20:39:25 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most guys don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes go for the apples near the ground because they are easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them; in reality, they are amazing. They just have to wait for the right guy to come along, the one who is brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.
2006-10-06 00:06:33 · answer #3 · answered by RKF 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmm, this is the first question that I've ever answered. Let me first digress to ask what does the phrase, "How come" mean? Seriously, think about it logically. Moving on: If a guy has displayed all of the things that you describe, then he's interested at some level. Figuring out where his interest lies is for you to find out and I advise caution. If he has since gone after another girl, I would say that girl was either more responsive to his flirting or simply less intimidating. If he's gone so far as to lay the groundwork for asking you out, but hasn't followed through, he's probably afraid of rejection. If you're interested and he's flirting, but not committing to a date, then you could proceed in a couple of ways. You could make it easy on him by asking him to take you out, something simple like, "Hey, we should do something sometime" or "Why don't we hang out more?". Something that opens up the topic for him to express himself more candidly. Guys also tend to follow sex, so try to avoid presenting the idea of hanging out with a provocative tone. The sex factor may also explain his pursuits elsewhere. It sounds like the guy likes you. If so and you've become friends, then he has let a number of opportunities pass without acting on the idea of dating, etc. The longer you are friends, the harder it will become for him to make an attempt at more. This may have frustrated him and lead him to someone else that was not a potential rejection. You could also just ask him out directly. Again, something subtle. Perhaps just include him in something that you're going to do. Let's say that you'd like to see a new movie at the theatre. It's easy enough to slip this into conversation: "So, what are you doing this weekend? ... I really want to see _____, I think I'm going to go on Saturday, ya wanna come?". If you're doing all of your flirting at school or work, the first step is to get away from that atmosphere and spend time together in a different environment. If he tends to talk about things that he's interested in, pick something that you're also interested in and indicate your interest: "You're going to the concert? I would to love to check that out!". It's sort of like inviting yourself, but it also gets immediate results. If he bails out with a lame reason for not inviting you, then his interest is marginal, but if he invites you... problem solved. Also, inviting him to do something with you is another way to get an indication of interest, because if he really likes you he'll jump at the opportunity to do anything, laundry, grocery shopping, anything, but if he's not interested, he'll pass on what could be a really good time. Hope this helps, good luck!
2006-10-06 00:12:51 · answer #4 · answered by chemicalburn2003 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hmm..... sounds like he is off his meds.... call his doctor and get his prescription refilled.
All joking aside, I have no idea why he would invest all that time into you and not go for it. Maybe he thought you were sending the wrong vibes. Maybe he was waing for a clear sign from you and never got it. Maybe after he got to know you better he felt you weren't his type.
2006-10-06 00:01:30 · answer #5 · answered by Tony 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men from my experiance like to keep options open if they commit to you by doing something they can;t take back like a kiss adate ect. Than they are stuck so they can't see anyone else if they get that flirty fun thing from you then they aren't desperate when they met someone they want more with. The sad thing is I don't even think they know what they are doing.
2006-10-06 00:00:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe they feel that they will be rejected by this girl and dont really get a response back from them. This other girl may seem less likely to reject them, asks them out or maybe possibly is better than the last one possibly.
2006-10-05 23:52:19 · answer #7 · answered by Oceans 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
join the girls club. there is a guys club, and a girls club. the guys talk about guy things. the girls talk about guys. expecially the bad ones, the ones that play games. (emotional). you have been played, hey that okay, everybody has been there. so, now its time to let the other girls know. its protecting the better ones.p.s. this my mom always said,: "don't believe anything you hear, and only half you see" sounds odd, just sit and wait.
2006-10-06 00:00:23 · answer #8 · answered by tgdjm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people are like that, flirtatious. Don't put a lot of stock into his flirting, just be a friend if that is all he wants.
2006-10-05 23:54:00 · answer #9 · answered by Val 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because they are cowards. A real man would actually ask, instead of being a big pussi calling her beautiful and not even making an attempt to get with her. Makes me sick to my stomach.
2006-10-05 23:53:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋