depressed help?

Question

i have gone from being called the next david lee rot to married with children to divorce part time dad with no life and really nothing to live for.if i thought she would ever have do this i woudn't have had a family with her,i've been there my parents got divorced and my life was never the same and i was a teenanger my girls are 5-8 sometimes i feel that maybe they would be better off dead than living a life were one parent quits on the other.advice. stop divorce in this country.the divorce rate is redicolus

Answer 1

You are a smart man because you realize that she has quit. It takes both people working together to keep a marriage going. You can not control other people as much as we would like to for their own good sometimes. Your children love you and need you to be alive. I agree that the divorce rate is awful. I wish I could tell you an easy answer for this painful experience. I hope that you have faith in God that will help to bring you through it. It is important that you talk about this with someone you feel you can trust. Do not bottle up all the pain inside you and do not let yourself be consumed with hate because it will eat you alive like a cancer. There will be light at the end of this dark tunnel so hold on, seek help and know that your children will always love you and need you no matter how things may look or sound right now.

Answer 2

Divorce is bad. When I was going through a divorce 16 years ago I heard someone say that divorce is worse than death because the person is gone but you still have to see them, and it's like having to see a corpse of the broken relationship walking around.

It's devastating. I don't think people really realize how devastating it really is. They try and go on as if it's all good, but I believe it's impossible to get away from the reality that something inside has died with that broken covenant. At some point, the booze, the sex, the TV, the whatever-it-is they turn to isn't going to be there - even if it's only for a split second. And then it's just going to be them and the hole that they left in their own heart and the in the heart of the person they broke covenant with. I speak from experience.

But that doesn't help you right now, I know.

Are you willing to pray? Are you willing to at least try it?

Someone once told me I needed to take a walk and talk with God. I didn't know the first thing about God, and I certainly didn't know anything about talking to God. Didn't have a clue. The only thing I remembered from going to church all those years as a kid was the connect the dots and tic-tac-toe games I used to play with whatever kid I got to sit next to. But I respected this person, and so I went on the walk. I kept looking up to the sky but didn't have a clue what to say. So I didn't say anything. But something happened in my heart just by being willing to take the time, take the walk, and look up in search for God. My depression didn't leave me overnight. But it was the start of something good that has lasted for nearly 13 years since that day, something stable, something solid, something that I can count on never changing and never fading.

I mean, you can turn to the things people turn to that are generated by people. And if you do, there's nothing wrong with that. It's just that I've never heard anyone say that this was the end all and the cure all. And sometimes you just need someone to talk to. I understand that. There's nothing wrong with that either. I just know that for me, man's solutions didn't quite fill the need. In the end, there was still me and the hole that needed to be filled in a place deep within that I didn't know how to get to.

I don't know your name, but God does. I hope it's okay for me to say that I'm praying for you because I am.

Answer 3

I do not forget myself a author (a minimum of, I write) and I'm no longer depressed. But frustration or even unhappiness is anything that comes from writing, when you consider that, as anybody else stated earlier than me, you are no longer simply feeling your possess americaand downs, however your characters as good. I'm an excessively emotional man or woman, I will admit, and I get labored up over stuff that probably I won't. Does how writing goes for me outcome my temper? I consider so. Writing is, for persons who're passionate approximately it, a sort of liberate in their innermost self, and whilst instantly anything occurs and that liberate will get up on maintain, it will get all bottled up. I bet that is why I name Writer's Block a disorder. You're being slowly tormented to loss of life by means of the strategies that you just can not write. Haha, so yeah. Are all writers emotional persons? I consider so. Are all of them depressed? I'm going to have got to disagree with that one, even though they without doubt all will also be depressed at unique occasions.

Answer 4

I agree divorce is rediculous and im not for it I love my husband and sometimes we argue but divorce is not the answer it's the easy way out of a problem. And some people think they can get divorced and marry someone else and be happy but if you don't fix the problems from wife #1 you'll have the same problems with # 2, 3, 4, 5 and so one running does'nt heal the hurt. Only Jesus.

Answer 5

Divorce is a bad thing but is a definite and forever part of our society. Life will get better but it's going to take some time. Try not to concentrate on your troubles. It helps trying a diversion. Try to do something to help someone else in trouble or who needs some kind of help, often that will help you look at your situation a little differently or at least take the edge off. God bless you, I'll keep you in my prayers.

Answer 6

The most important thing I can tell you is this: God loves you. He cares about you. He knows what you are going through. And He can help. We are sorry to learn of this heartbreaking situation. God's Word makes it very clear that marriage is a commitment for life to the one individual out of all the world that we have chosen to be our mate. This commitment means saying "Yes" to our wife or husband and "No" to all others in the matter of intimate friendship. The marriage vow says, "Forsaking all others," and in Matthew 19:5 we read: "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." In verse 6b Jesus adds: "Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

When there is unfaithfulness in a marriage, the heartbroken person has several options. One option is to be bitter—trying to hurt the offending partner in the hope that it will produce guilt and a willingness to change. There is another way which may be infinitely harder, but we believe it is better. In times such as these, God always invites us to commit ourselves and the situation completely to Him. Allow your present circumstances to be an opportunity for you to deepen your faith and to depend completely on the Lord. If you have never accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior, we urge you to make this commitment today by turning from sin, trusting Christ to forgive you, and inviting Jesus to direct your life.

When you have committed your heart and your life into the safety of God's keeping, then you will be able to respond in love in this situation. This kind of love is based on 1 Corinthians, chapter 13. Please pause and read this chapter now. Even though you know a great wrong has been done, consider how God has loved us even when we were sinners, unrepentant and hateful (Romans 5:8). Pattern your love after His; see John 13:35 and 1 John 4:7. Also read the responsibilities of husbands and wives given in 1 Peter 3:1-12 and Ephesians 5:21-33.

We suggest that you consult with a Gospel-preaching pastor or Christian marriage counselor in your area for ongoing guidance. God is in the healing business. While He cannot make your spouse change, with His help, we believe you may in time be able to enjoy the rich blessings of a loving, healthy relationship. Pray for the restoration and growth of deep love within your marriage, and for your spouse who has caused you such deep hurt.

Remember, being loving and forgiving does not mean that you simply endure the act of unfaithfulness. Adultery has consequences for all parties involved that cannot easily be resolved. As a means of bringing your spouse to repentance and restoring your marriage, you may want to consider some of the principles expressed in Dr. James Dobson's book "Love Must Be Tough." We would also suggest any of the following books: "The Christian Family" by Larry Christenson, "Love Is a Decision" by Gary Smalley and John Trent, and "Love Life for Every Married Couple" by Ed Wheat. These books are available at most Christian bookstores.

May God's peace be with you (Philippians 4:6).

Answer 7

Stopping divorces wouldn't solve anything: it can be much worse for kids to live in a house where the parents obviously don't love each other. More importantly, though, you should speak to a professional. Without knowing you, I can say that you have something to live for: you have children. Give them a good life: it's not always about the dreams we had in our youths. Rather, it can be about the dreams we allow the next generation the leisure to have.

Answer 8

i have two children from previous relationships
they love their dad very very much and the time they spend with him is so precious and valuable
i know that without their dad life would be very lonely and sad for them
dont ever think that they do not need both parents in their lives
i too was raised in a divorced household and both my parents ( even seperatly ) meant the world to me
children need their parents ... together or seperate
and for them .. you have a lot to live for
please seek help for your depression and one day you will treasure life and every moment of it xx

Answer 9

LOOK at your children. Can you tell THEM that you have nothing to live for. Can you imagine what your death would do to them? Stop thinking about yourself and focus on them--are you selfish enough to leave them wondering if they are in any way to blame for their father's suicide? Because they WILL think that--and try to figure out what they could have said or done to reach out to you if they had only known how you felt.

Answer 10

it is rediculous. When you get married you promise forever, shows how many people keep their promises huh?

I also have divorced parents (my mother divorced 2wice, my father once and is remarried)

It is harder having split parents, but it is better then your daughters being dead