Questions about depression?

Question

My husband and I just had a baby 6 months ago and he has not been the guy I met first he was not supportive when I was pregnate and then he was good when the baby was born and then at about 3 months he wanted to seperate rooms didnt want any thing to do with me come to find out he had kissed another girl. well after that he told her he wanted nothing to do with her but now he is telling me he isnt happy with his self and he doesnt know why he isnt happy and also he said I dont listen and he cant talk to me because I dont understand and he wont go to counseling

Answer 1

keep trying, after the first child the mother does end up dividing her time and intimacy in between the husband and the child. frequent awakenings in the night disturb the whole day and then the whole week, he should not look into other women at all, good luck

Answer 2

My son's father was kind of like that. He was happy when we had the baby and then after about a month he got jealous. Jealousy kicks in after a while. Some men don't like it so much that they think that they are second in your life now and in all out reality they are. You have to make them think that he's first if not he will feel like the second wheel. If he doesn't want to go to counseling it's not because he doesn't want to try, a lot of men think that it is stupid and nobody else should here there business. Try doing nice little things for him (messages or a romantic dinner for the two of you, with a little dessert on the side if you know what I mean)and if he is still distant then tell him you should separate for a while. Drop it on him before he drops it on you trust me you will feel a lot better. Even if it's only for a week. You need some time apart. Miguel and I were separated for 3 months and I asked him to come back after a week and he said no. I tried every time he came over for 2 months. Then I stopped,, I told him once he got his partying out or whatever he needed to get out of his system then come back. So one day he broke down and now our relationship is better than when we were first together. You should try it, it's not for everyone but that's only because they know that there man will never come back.

Sincerely yours,
Laurie

Answer 3

Have you lost your baby fat? Is your body the same as it was when you met him? Do you spend more time dealing with the baby then paying attention to him? The problem is that you are the one that has changed. Try and get a baby sitter and make him feel like a man. The baby has change everything for both of you and it will never be the same. It can get better but you, that's right I said you have to work at it. If you haven't lost the weight do it. Your marriage depends on you being sexy and attractive to your husband, Baby or no Baby. Trust me been there done that.

Answer 4

It sounds as if he may be suffering from depression. He may feel overwhelmed by the added responsibilities of a baby. Continue to be supportive and try to talk him into counseling and at least seeing his primary care physician.

Answer 5

You should go to counseling - even if he won't go. You will learn how to deal with him in ways that are more effective.

The two of you should try to work it out - yes, for the baby's sake. Children do better with both parents.

Good luck.

Answer 6

why dont you bring back that spark by being romantic (let a family member baby-sit), after he comes home why dont you turn off the lights and set candles and rose pedals on the floor leading to the bedroom (not the candles). and throw rose pedals on the bed with you laying down with sexy langerie. and have a bottle of wine next to 2 wine glasses on the nightstand. tell him how much you love him and how much you want to feel that love and romance with him again. whisper in his ear as you gently blind fold him...whisper and tell him how much you really want to make love to him. please him in every way a man wants to be pleased (including oral sex and other sexual activities) kiss him in every part of his body and try new sexual positions. then after all of that, as ya'll cuddle, remind him that you love and care for him so much and that you dont want to lose him. remind him of the vows y'all have promised before god on your wedding day. he promised to honor and cherish his wife (you). kissing other women wasnt a part of the promise.. he is to be faithful.ask him in a calm voice to explain to you why is he acting that way ever since you got pregnant. it takes 2, you didnt become pregnant by your self. ask him to compromise and commit into the relationship. let him know that he is still your number 1 regardless of the baby which is your pride and joy. PROBABLY, when he found out you were pregnant he either wasnt ready or he knew all of your attention wouldnt be set on him as much any more. (maybe a little jealousy).. good luck.. and feel free to contact me to continue this dicussion

Answer 7

Its rough cuse nobody is gonna just up and change in a second let him get his had streight and useto being around the baby.

Answer 8

i think he's getting mixed messanges right now since you just had a baby and stuff. and not use to have a little baby around... is this ur first child? if it is then it would aplay more to what i had just said... he's not sure what to do in life right now.

Answer 9

You need to tell him your concerns and that you really want to talk about this. It sounds like he is about to bail. If you both want to stay in the marriage, you need to convince him to seek a counselor. If he loves you, he'll do this.

Answer 10

he does not want the life he is living now, sorry, if he will not go counseling means that he wants to leave you.