I just met him couple weeks ago and he's becoming attached to me very quickly. I have been talking to him a couple times every day since we met, but today I was busy and didn't call him. I got 6 messages, two online, two on cell, and two on home phone. I had told him I would call this AM but didn't. Do you think it's a red flag that he wants to get close and have an "instant" relationship so quickly? Btw, he's 35 and i'm 32, so it's not like we're teenagers. Also the other day he told me he feels like he could spend the rest of his life with me. Tell me what you think. Thanks.
2006-10-05 08:22:57 · 18 answers · asked by ? 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yeah, he seems needy and possessive and desperate, all of which combine into a nice little recipe for disaster. RUN!!
2006-10-05 08:25:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
We are so used to having things instantly handed to us now. Gone are the old days of 4-6 weeks for delivery. An email to another country can only take seconds to be received. A package from New York to China can be sent in less than 24 hours. Cell phones have put us all closer together than we might want to be. We sometimes expect this in other areas of our lives. Watch out for him coming on too strong to you too quickly - that rest of his life thing sounds scary.
2006-10-05 08:27:34 · answer #2 · answered by Fun and Games 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest good for you! There is something about you that has allowed him to drop all his games and put the power in your court. But he is most definitely a little insecure about something and needs verification that you like him as much as he likes you. If you do like him, but want to slow down, flat out tell him he is asking for too much right now and he needs to back off a little or say good bye.
He probably thinks you are perfect and are exactly what he wants and doesn't have to "play games". You probably gave him the idea that you really like him too.
I would say it is a red flag and if you are not sure about your interest level, let him go.
2006-10-05 08:29:38 · answer #3 · answered by tightlies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you read up much on commitmentphobia? This sounds like a classic case. Men who come on way too strong in the early part of the relationship are out for the chase and will not commit once they have you. Beware of this guy. He's too old to be acting this way and sounds overly controlling! Keep your distance, keep your life, and look for someone who knows how to pace a relationship.
2006-10-05 08:27:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the flag that should be hung would be red. A few weeks is pretty fast to make a pain in the butt of yourself to the one that you're trying to impress. Be careful as he sounds like a vey controlling and possibly an abusive personality.
2006-10-05 08:28:09 · answer #5 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from what you say, he's looking for a relationship more than pals. You call it a red flag instead of a green light which sounds like you don't. Tell him to slow down and so you can enjoy one another because he's starting to annoy you. If he's mature, he'll respect your word. If not, get ready for a restraining order. Good luck!
2006-10-05 08:28:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It has been my experience that any man who wants to skip the get to know each phase and jump right into a relationship has something he doesn't want you to know about. If you have not been with this man long enough to form any kind of feelings, I say end this relationship (it may take some effort) and find a man
who will go through all steps.
2006-10-05 08:43:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
RUN!! He 's like this now, what will he be like 10 months for now. He sounds like the type that needs attention 24/7. He might get upset if u plan stuff w/ just friends. He might even be a stalker. Personally I would be freaked the hell out. (I watch too much Lifetime)
2006-10-05 08:28:54 · answer #8 · answered by Aidge 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's moving a bit faster than you're comfortable with. Frankly I don't blame you, it sounds a bit fast to me too.
I'd also be concerned about his calling / messaging so much, he should be comfortable calling once, leaving a message, and waiting for you to get back to him. After all, you've only known each other for a couple weeks.
2006-10-05 08:26:48 · answer #9 · answered by Sheik Yerbouti 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds a bit clingy to me...One message would have been enough...and any "forever" talk would be a red flag if it happens only a few weeks into a relationship...you better start establishing your own space here...he's gonna smother you.
2006-10-05 08:26:54 · answer #10 · answered by Joe 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't over-react. Maybe he was offered tickets to a game or show and wanted to know if you interested in going. It's possible that he needed a quick answer. At least give him the benefit of the doubt... providing this is the first time it's happened.
2006-10-05 08:26:44 · answer #11 · answered by tbayxxxv 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋