Is my boyfriends adult daughter too attached to her dad?

Question

Is my boyfriends adult daughter too attached to her dad?

Hi. I've been dating this lovely man for about two years now. However his adult daughter seems not to think much of me. She's been cold to me for as long as I've known her. On the other hand I'm wondering if my boyfriends relationship with his daughter is a little bit too close. For ex.,





1. She's 25 yrs old and still calls her father daddy




2. They call each other every day and talk for about 30-45 minutes




3. She tells him everything




4. Her job requires her to be on her feet alot so she'll often come to her dad house and he'll rub her feet while they talk about their day.

BTW could you guys tell me which ones are wierd and which ones are normal

Answer 1

How sweet, I hope my daughters still have this close of a relationship with there daddy when they are adults. I think there is nothing wrong with this. Don't try to change people, anything you don't like about someone now will only get worse in time.

Answer 2

Hi, I am 27. I still call my mom, momma sometimes so to me, her calling her father daddy is no big deal. She is probably cold towards you because you are in His life and she still needs to be the center of attention. I talk to my mom anywhere from 1-200 times a day on the phone, she's my mom though and I have a wonderful relationship with her. I will tell her everything, even if it doesn't seem "normal" to someone else. When I get to go visit her which is all of once a year, she still scratches my back for me. That was our bonding thing when I was little and it just sort of stuck with us. I think she is very lucky to have a father like that in her life. She has been blessed. So in all, I think they have a pretty normal relationship but I also think she may be jealous of you or think that you are trying to take over. Have you ever talked to her about it? Remember too that not all people like each other and it might just be a personality clash and nothing more.

Answer 3

1 thru 3 sound OK. There's nothing wrong with a daughter being so close to her father to keep calling him "daddy", talking to him on the phone and having long conversations or telling him everything (wait, what's your example of everything? does she tell him everything about her life including her relationships and sex life?). However, the rubbing of the feet is really weird (to me, anyway). As others have mentioned, she's daddy's little girl. That's a hard thing to live up to. Growing up, my mom always told me to never go out with a mama's boy because he'll always put his mom before you. I would think that the same goes the other way around. Just keep these things in mind if you want to stay with this man.

Answer 4

Well, everything sounds normal to me other than the feet rubbing thing, I wouldn't want my dad to do that. I still call him daddy (especially when I want something, lol) and I'm 27. I do tell my dad everything and call him on a regular basis. When my parents split up I was 19 years old. About 6 months after the divorce he started seeing another women...I was outraged and hated everything about her. It took me a good year to finally lighten up to her. I was mad because, one, it was very hard for me to see him with another women other than my mother. And two, you kind of get this jealousy feeling because I did feel he liked her more than me! Yes, eventually it went away and I do like her very much. But she has always been kind to me even though I was a total witch! Are you nice to his daughter or do you blow her off? If you are nice, just continue being nice eventually it will click with her. But if you're mean to her she will always be mean back and might one day successfully break you and her father up. I do wish you the best of luck because I know this is a very sensitive subject. I'm just curious though, have you brought this up with your boyfriend? Or have you even tried to discuss this with the daughter on how you feel?

Answer 5

I didn't understand what you were complaining about until I got to No. 4, that part there sound just a little weird to me and I'm very close with both my parents and i still call my dad daddy...I'm 25, married w/child and my feet hurt but i don't believe i could allow my father to rub my feet....that's the line of my father/daughter relationship.

I don't believe she should treat you wrong though, if your intentions are grand she will come around...but give them their space when his daughter come around...don't try to steal her time...and she should definitely respect your time with her father.

Answer 6

It's her father!!!! I'm the same way with my father. Have you ever thought that maybe she doesn't like you because she knows that you are bothered by her loving her dad. There's nothing wrong with that and you need to basically get over it. I have a step-mom and I don't like her for the same reason because she always has something to say about my father doing things for us. I'm 23 and I also still call my father daddy and it will probably stay that way until he or I dies.

Answer 7

I am 32 and I call my Father ~ DADDY. That is what he is, my hero, the one that always takes care of his little girl no matter what. I talk to my Dad every day too. My dad use to rub my neck for me when I lived at home. Grow up and get over it. The reason she doesn't like you is because it sounds like you try to get between her and her Daddy. Maybe if you would try to become her friend, you would find out what the real meaning of "Love" is.

Answer 8

1-3 I thought were no big deal, even cute. The foot rubbin is a bit much. See "Pulp Fiction" Scene 2. Sorry Honey, she's Daddy's girl and always will be. Win her over if you want that relationship. You're on her turf.

Answer 9

She's obviously a big part of his life, and she could be being cold to you because she's afraid you'll cut into her time with him. I don't think they can be "too close" unless it's incestuous, and you didn't make it sound that way. The two of your need to learn to coexist. She's not going anywhere, and if he's a great guy, you shouldn't either.

My mother always called her father "Daddy" until he died when she was in her 50s.

Answer 10

Well I am 25 and still call my dad daddy and we talk on a daily basis??? SO am I to attached? My boyfreind says it's cause my parents have always treated me as an equal. We will do things with my parents on a regular basis. I guess I see them as a freind