Please read this, my father has died?

Question

Please feel free to look at my first question so you can understand the meaning of this post.

My father passed away on tuesday after a final hour of rest on his bed. It was quite a shock as the doctors had said he may reach the end of this month, but he was getting very tired; we spent the last few days driving around as he wanted to see all the places that were special to him one last time. We went for a walk in the woods (my father in a wheelchair) where he proposed to my mum, and fed the ducks at the lake she always used to love sitting at. Then we went to see a football game at our local ground, it was very touching because at the end of the match all of the players came and shook his hand and said they would sign a shirt for him- he had gone to nearly every home game for the last thirty years.

He died old and tired, longing to see his wife and friends again and glad he'd had a long, happy life. His last words were 'Now my light has gone out,', and he had a smile on his face.

I would like to thank you all for your answers to my previous questions and please feel free to write anything you'd like here as I know it isn't really a question.

Ian Barton, 1949-2006. Loving husband and father of three (all deceased, save me). We will see each other again one day.

Answer 1

wow that was a really touching post and reminded me of my own dad who passed away in January
he was told he would last a few months only to last a few days
you were very blessed though that you had those last days to share and leave you with some wonderful memories
the love between you is strong and not even death can take that away
my love and condolences to you and your family xx

Answer 2

Just read your post. My deepest sympathies go to you. What a very special way to spend his last few days, he was lucky to have such a loving son. I have been studying the Bible for a couple of years now and a basic truth in the Bible is the Resurrection of the dead. Since this world as it is now, is not how it was first created, God has given us an opportunity to live again in world not governed by man, but governed by His Kingdom.
Through the ransom of His son Jesus Christ, we all have that prospect open to us, just as your father had. So take comfort from the knowledge that he isn't some place in torment or anywhere else for that matter, he is simply sleeping in death until our Lord Jesus Christ awakens him to eternal life on a restored earth, where he will again be with his wife and friends, where sickness and death will be things of the passed. I would like to share a scripture with you that describes what I am talking about -
Revelation 21 verses 1 - 4
"And I saw a new heaven and a new earth; for the former heaven and the former earth had passed away, and the sea is no more. 2 I saw also the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God and prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. 3 With that I heard a loud voice from the throne say: “Look! The tent of God is with mankind, and he will reside with them, and they will be his peoples. And God himself will be with them. 4 And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.”

I hope this has answered your question and brought you some comfort at this difficult time. Once again I am sorry for your loss.

Answer 3

Hi John, Genuinely sad to hear about your Dad. I've just read over your last few entries and I feel very happy at the response that you got. People sometimes forget that there are still good ones out there..!! You sound like a kind, definitely caring, man. And from how you describe your Dad, so is he.
I'm not a religious person, but I do believe we should live as good a life as possible as nobody really knows whats coming. By the sounds of it, your Dad did just that.
I'm thinking of you, and I hope you have plenty of support around you to help...

Answer 4

Thank you for your posting. My father is terminally ill and he is currently having chemo in a last ditch effort to buy him a little more time. My sister and I are currently compiling a list of things he has said he wants to do at some time or other so we can try and get some of them arranged before his time runs out.
I hope you are at peace with his passing, you did a wonderful thing in helping him reinforce his memories before he died.
It is a priveledge to be able to help someone at the end of their life, and although I am sure you are in pain now, I hope that will bring you some comfort.
Peace.

Answer 5

If only everyone had as such a loving and caring person as your father did, the end of their lives would be so much better.

In reality - to me at least - it almost seems like the way you'd go about courting a lover, not caring for a terminally ill relative, and, despite not knowing you, am proud of your actions.

When my father died from cancer, I remember seeing his body in the chapel and thinking to myself he finally looks out of pain and at peace.

You can console yourself in the knowledge you've made his last moments immeasurably happier, and who knows (I answered your previous question and said I was an atheist) he may get to thank you for that if it's all true.

Sorry for your loss, and again, contact me if you feel the need.

Answer 6

I'm sorry for your loss, and send a prayer your way to help you remain strong.
Your Father did get to do some of the things he wanted to do before he passed on, both you and him are very lucky that you had this special time together.
My Father had a heart attack last week and was very close to death, he's only 52, thankfully he is recovering now. I could have lost my Dad with no last words or last memories. I think your Dad was ready to go, and now he can see all his family again and will always be watching down on you and your family.
God Bless and Take Care

Answer 7

Death is merely the passing from this stage to a more blissful one.
Where your father is now, there is no requirement for a wheelchair (my father also was in a wheelchair, he lost his right leg).
Your father will not only be surrounded by his loved ones who have preceded him , he will be filled with youthfulness, joy, a happiness overflowing with the knowledge that one day you too will be there to share all this with him.
PS
I cannot believe someone was mean enough to give minus point to every answer.I have counteracted that by giving 1 plus point to you all.
Love and Light!

Answer 8

Feel no pain at this loss. Feel no regret that your father is where he wants to be. I ask you too feel joy at this time in your life. Remember that so many of us wish for the kind of life that brings us joy and when the time comes that we must move on what better way than the way you and your father spent his final hours. I hope that you will remember the good times at this sad time instead of the emptiness and loss that comes with the passing of a loved one. Peace to you and yours.

Answer 9

Hi

I am sorry for your loss, but it sounds like it was a nice and peaceful end, and will bring some happy memories for you all.

If you decide that you'd like someone to speak to now or in the future, CRUSE Bereavement Care are a good agency to contact. Your local branch will be in Yellow Pages.

Take care

Answer 10

Blessings on you and my deepest sympathies in the loss of your father. I still miss my Dad who died from the complications of Alzheimer's in 1999. I would have loved to have one last peaceful day with him. I think it may have helped him, too, find peace and acceptance for his own passing to come. You gave him a very special and rare final gift. I'm so glad for you that you had those special moments. They will give you so much comfort and strength as you deal with your grief. May you carry that love with you always.

Good Journeys,

Asha