If a person is diagnosed with cancer do u think they have a right to know?

Question

When my father was diagnosed my mother and 2 sisters felt that telling him would only make him worse. He was given 4-6 months to live and the doctors said there was nothing could be done for him. Its almost 2 years since he died and i still can't help thinking he should have known

Thanks everybody

Answer 1

doctors would tell the patients first as far as i'm aware

Answer 2

I don't know of any situation where a patient wouldn't know that they had cancer. I mean, what would the doctor have said, if asked by the sick person, "Why am I sick?" I don't think it is right to keep that kind of information away from any one. You hear a lot about people who do things that they always wanted to, when they find out they have terminal cancer. As healthy people we think that we have all the time in the world to do things. See the Grand Canyon, visit the Statue of Liberty, go skiing for the first time, maybe even try out skydiving. Your Dad might have missed out on doing things he would have enjoyed, and I feel that that is very sad. Unfortunately it is too late to do anything about it. I suggest that you discuss this with the people who are closest to you, and your doctor to make sure it doesn't happen to you. I hope that if you were to get sick that you would know why, and be able to finish living your life to the fullest extent. Maybe go Bungee Jumping!! I'm sure your Dad knows now what was going on, and I know he knows that you guys only did it so that he wouldn't despair. Only maybe he wouldn't have. Forgive yourself, and your family for keeping that secret from him, and live your life!

Answer 3

The same thing happened with my mum. The doctors told us she had a few months to live and we couldnt bear to tell her. It didnt matter in the end, as she died the very next day, but I would have kept it from her and said they are trying their best for you. However, I have 2 brothers who may well have told her. The Doctors dont always tell the patients if they dont think they are strong enough to deal with the news, then it is up to the relatives which is an awful burden as we are not trained for that kind of thing. Your dad is at peace now that is what matters.

Answer 4

Sorry for your loss.
My nana has just been diagnosed with lung cancer and it has made a very little lady very strong and an attitude of "I'll beat this". So I would most definately say that the person should know, it brings out an inner strength you never knew existed. Well in my case anyway.

Answer 5

I think your father should have been informed of his diagnosis as most people like to tie up loose ends and live out any dreams before they make their journey to the other side. Don't be too harsh on your mother and sister though, they only wanted to 'protect' your father from knowing the inevitable, in order for him not to give up the will to live.

Answer 6

That's very sad. I'm sorry to hear it.
Personally I do think he should have been told. But try not to be too regretful about it. Your mum and sisters felt that they were doing the kindest thing by not telling him. That may have been the wrong decision in many people's eyes, but they decided it because they love him and didn't want him to suffer any more distress that he had to. Try to take comfort from that.

Answer 7

it depends on the situation. what you need to ask you with would knowing he had cancer have made his last months better or would it have made him miserable. I know someone who died from cancer recently and I sometimes think that he would have been better off not knowing. For the last 6 months of his life he was very down and miserable and took it all out on his family.

Answer 8

Everyone that is saying "of course!" may not have been there; If dad was 94 with a late stage cancer and in hospital in poor health anyway, what use would more stress have served?

If he was 38 with early-stage cancer that was very treatable, then it would be wrong.

Answer 9

Yes every one of us should have the right to know if we have a terminal illness. Its the only way a person can tie up all the loose ends and be at peace with all

Answer 10

Exactly the same happened with my Dad and when my Mum had the same 2 years later, we asked the doctor not to tell her, but he did and she had a heart attack within hours of being told, thankfully she made it through, but 3months later when she was near the end she said she wish they had never told her

Answer 11

I have had problem whether I should know the truth that I'm dying or better not to know at all. At my very young age, my parents think that I better not knowing the truth. But many answer I received suggest me to know the truth, so I told my parents that I want to know the truth. It's very hard at first when to hear that you are going to die. For sometimes, it's feel very horrible, and still is. But I think that better I know what going to happened to me than not.