A guy I used to date years ago has come back into my life and I know I still care for him. We were younger then and maybe the timing was off, who knows. We have been talking for a while now and he is going through some hard times. He is divorced and I just dont know if second chances really exist? How do I know it isn't just something comfortable to go back to or that I really still care for him??
2006-10-04 19:51:04 · 10 answers · asked by Beaner80 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I was young, not even old enough to drink yet. No one cheated or lied and there was no abuse. I know I have never loved anyone like I love him. I also no that I am scared, and I can't imagine not at least trying?
2006-10-04 19:59:39 · update #1
ask your self why did you two break up and go from there. is it still there...? the reason...?
2006-10-04 19:52:57 · answer #1 · answered by hamhead 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd be curious to know why he left your life in the first place. If it was a bad thing, then maybe its best not to bother. He may only be coming back into your life because he knows he can get away with "X". If he's going through some hard times, are you really sure you want to go through them with him? He might just drag you down with him. Yes, second chances really do exist, but they have to be for the right reasons. I would really think on it first.
2006-10-05 02:56:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, part of it depends on what hard times he's going through... I mean, you don't want to be someone that he just leans on, right?
Be honest with yourself, are you just trying to take care of him...
I find that the Best Relationships are when the Two People are Best Friends... And each person works as hard as the other for the Relationship to work...
If you're going to get together with him, just so that he can lean on you, and/or you can take care of him, then it's probably not a good idea...
After all, whose going to take care of you, if you're spending all your time taking care of him?
Try not to enter into Relationships that are Unbalanced right off the Bat... They may last for a little, or a long while... But by the end, you will feel emotionally warn out, and maybe a bit used...
If you truly feel that the two of you are Equals Emotionally, then maybe start going on a Date here and there with him... But, like I said, if you're just going to get together with him so that he can lean on you, and you will take care of him, there for you feel needed... I wouldn't recommend it... It's just not an Emotionally Equal Relationship...
Good Luck
2006-10-05 03:06:43 · answer #3 · answered by Corandero 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
at the moment he is pretty vulnerable being he is going thru a hard time and the affection he once had in his marriage is no longer there. As humans we dersire attention constantly so i think ur bieng a gud fren by being there for him.but i wud humbly advise that u dun get involved with him yet.it may b a gud idea but the timing is not too good becuz he may get involed with u bt u wud constantly wonder if he is doing so becuz he luvs u or to ease his pain n recover from his ex.that wud put u in a lot of turmiol since u wud want to his total dedication like u wud b giving bt he has a divorce on his plate so it wud b hard to gain his fuul attention n luv.givem him time to get over her n u kan even help him n then he wud c how much u care for him n fallbak in luv with u.bt for the mean time-be patient n rethink if u really wanna get bak with him becuz u luv him or becuz both of u r availabel.
wat eva ur decison make the one that u wudnt regret n wudnt wreck ur friendship
ps
u kan pray to GOD aba it
prayer helps
i hope dis advice is good for u
2006-10-05 03:00:04 · answer #4 · answered by miz dazzle 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he make your stomach flip? Do you get excited to see and talk to him? If so, then you still have a thing for him. There's nothing wrong with second chances. Maybe your first go-around wasnt the right time for either of you. Maybe youve both grown up and have learned a few things that can make your relationship work. Give it a go!
2006-10-05 03:00:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop worrying and do it. If he hasn't done anything bad to you and doesn't seem like he would, then whats the problem? Unless there is a REAL good reason why things didn't work out in the past, like you had no real connection or something.
2006-10-05 02:54:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You will never know unless you try. Dating is like an interview.....some just dont qualify. Better to of dated and lost then to live a lonely misserable wondering life.
2006-10-05 02:55:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For me was existing and really ruin my life for a years.
My advice don't even try.
2006-10-05 02:55:31 · answer #8 · answered by Toto 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is no seond chance they never work out
2006-10-05 02:53:19 · answer #9 · answered by dee d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you just know.
2006-10-05 02:53:43 · answer #10 · answered by 1chunx4u 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋