This is a serious question....I'm not trying to be weird.....I'm just wondering how my post-kids sex life compares to the rest of you parents out there. How has your sex life changed after you had kids? How often per week (or month or year) are you having sex? Are you happy with the frequency? Is your husband happy with the frequency? What is the biggest reason you have sex as in/frequently as you do? How old are your kids?
Thanks for your answers!
2006-10-04 15:59:41 · 20 answers · asked by nvone 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I can tell you that before I had my kids (10year old, and 3 year old, +1miscarriage) my husband and I just wouldn't stop. We had sex all the time up to 3 or 4 times a day/night. And the minute I had my first child my libido went I don't know where. Sexual activity declined to about 2-3 times a week on a good week and I was just happy but I know my husband wasn't. I believe it all changed 'cause taking care of a baby full time is not an easy task so by the time I put them to bed I'm exhausted. I remember when my children were both tiny they would go to bed for the night around 7or 8 and I was right there with them, 'cause not only was I exhausted but I knew that I had to rest for when they would wake up in the middle of the night. I also think that the change in hormones during and after pregnancy just messes things up for us women. Also birth control can mess things up for us. Now that my youngest is 3, I try my hardest to please my husband at least 3-4 times a week. It's still a big difference from the beginning, but hey, I got a lot on my plate with the children, helping with homework, house work, running around in the day to get errands done. It's a lot.
I hoped I helped. But now I'm curious, How did your sex life change, if at all after having children?
2006-10-04 16:37:55 · answer #1 · answered by hilda c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Our sex life has changed dramatically after kids. We have two kids ages (almost) 6 and 3. Before our first kid we used to have sex just about everyday and then after the first kid it was still quite often (almost everyday) and now after the second kid it is hardly once or twice a week. But then I got pregnant about 3 months after we were married so thats why we did it so often in the beginning. And to answer your question about what the husband thinks, he is not happy with the way it is now at all. But I cant help I just cant get myself into it anymore. Maybe I am just so exhausted by the end of the day that's why. Doing it just once or twice a week suits me just fine, but definately not my husband.
2006-10-04 16:08:37 · answer #2 · answered by 4everNever 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some women sex is very painful after delivery. I've heard some women say it's almost like giving birth again. And that can last for months. That can put a damper on sex.
Also, you are always worrying about the baby so it's hard to enjoy it. It's hard to get in the mood when you're worried that the baby is going to start crying as soon as you get started.
Since having my baby 5 months ago & seeing how difficult it is to do sometimes, I've been wondering how so many women have babies so close together. I know girls who have babies less than a year apart & I'm thinking how in the world did they feel like it(physically), have the time or the energy, and where was their baby when they were getting pg, LOL!
2006-10-04 16:07:06 · answer #3 · answered by Michelle *The Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son is 16.6 months old, and I am still nursing.
We have sex less than once a week, mainly because my libido is very low, but also because I dont rest enough and am too tired for sex. We cosleep, which is great, but our room isnt very romantic anymore. I wish I was more horny, and so does my husband. I think that going on dates helps parent's sex life. I usually feel like it after my husband and I have gone to see a movie, or as was the case on monday, went to a wedding in the evening.
2006-10-04 16:58:18 · answer #4 · answered by Delphine F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a 7 year old, a 1 year old and 7 months pregnant. All you have to do is keep the kids on a schedule. Homework, play time/t.v., dinner, bath, bed time at 9pm and you and your partner have all night. Myself we are have sex more often the closer it is to my due date. I am not sure how we are going to be having to wait for 6 weeks after I give birth. Just keep sex fun and don't make it a chore.
2006-10-04 16:50:00 · answer #5 · answered by charity b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my son is 11 months old. before him we used to do it like rabbits. that's probably how we got him in the first place! :) now we are down to about once every two weeks, if we're lucky. i changed jobs and we work different hours, so it's really hard for me to even be awake when he gets home. working full time and being a full time mother really takes it out of you. sometimes i would much rather just get that extra hour of sleep. i'm ok with the frequency, my sex drive has gone way down after my son's birth. however, i'm sure that my hubby is not satisfied.
2006-10-04 16:06:33 · answer #6 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have two children, 9 and 2. The frequency does decline. If you want to change that put the kids to bed earlier or make plans for a hotel once a month. Is it worth fifty bucks?!!
2006-10-04 16:05:27 · answer #7 · answered by feliciadawn7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have two kids 9 months and 2 1/2 years old the frequincy of our marital relations has declined but we try to catch nap time if we fill we need it . We usually get it every other night at most 2 days but I am satisfied and I think My husband is also .
2006-10-04 16:08:12 · answer #8 · answered by brandi.smiles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married 22yrs.. my daughter is 20, just signed up for the navy,my son 17 still in school....it changed alot after the kids,
but had to deal with it, but now that there older there not at
home much, he works over alot.... don't see him much either..
not to happy with the frequency, maybe by the month....and I
know he's working because its right at home....
2006-10-04 16:14:00 · answer #9 · answered by jojo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well right now the dad works out of town and is home on weekends and we try to do it 2-3 times then to make up for the missed week.our baby is 3 months old.i think the sex is good and the only reason it is varied sometimes is depending on the baby sleeping.and we are pretty lucky he sleeps through the night 80% of the time.
2006-10-04 16:05:44 · answer #10 · answered by destinymoon_16 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋