OK I have this friend "kate". She has ben a huge part of my life. I care about her alot. This summer she started dating this guy we all would party together and I thought he was a great guy, a gentlemen around her. I liked him tell recently things started to get weird I noticed they were doing cocaine. And be very secretive about it. (The way I found out was shady but its a long story that I wont get into it.) I just figured she was trying it. Then I took her out W/O her B/F and she asked me (drunk) if I knew any one at the party that had coke. I sat her down and talked with her about her drug use. And she fliped out and told me it wasnt like that mind my own bissness I told her I would. The next day I talked to her B/F In person.(who suplies her with coke) He assured me that he had kates best interest in mind and he genuinely had feelings for her, and no more nose candy. Well their still doing coke alot and she's distancing her self from her friends. We dont know what to do?
2006-10-04 07:34:45 · 9 answers · asked by rebel_slash_hippy 2 in Health ➔ Other - Health
It is very difficult and you are a good friend caring for her, but also for telling her how you felt about it. If kate does not want help there is not much you can do but to stand by her and be the best friend you can be. Keep going out without the BF as her independance from him will keep her strong even though you cannot see that. She will make the right choice and you will be there to help and support her when she does. He sounds like a bad egg, and he is controlling her with this substance. Nothing you say will change what she is doing at the moment but she will realise and will need you more than ever. it is difficult, but keep up your friendship and the more you can get her out away from him the better as this will give her some independance so she does not become totally reliant as then you have lost your battle.
Good luck to you and i wish i had a good mate like you.
CJay
2006-10-04 07:42:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to know her issues. Her problems.
What exactly is going on in her life that she just has to escape?
Youve gotta understand her pain. And when you do, confront her about it and just be there for her... know what i mean?
Most of all - dont force her. Dont tell her to do anything that didnt come as her own decision. She has to make her own choice... and if there's any help you can offer, its making her actually WANT to make a choice.
Drugs are like friends, you know... People use it to get immediate bliss... relief... something to help forget those that bother the mind. And if it makes someone feel good, then despite the consequences of it all, it IS good because it FEELS good. It soothes your pain.
Thats why its not easy to say goodbye to these friends... why? coz there's no guarantee of an alternative bliss. Another friend.
Maybe, you could help her discover that alternative... within this "real world"...
2006-10-04 07:52:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There isn't much you can do unfortunately. Other than telling her that you care about her and will listen to her and help her whenever she is ready. But see that's the key here. She has to recognize that she has a problem and she wants to change. Until that happens or if that happens, you and her friends and family members have no other choice than to see her go down hill from here. You can't change another person or make another person do what you want them to do. Each person has a right to make his or her own choices in life, no matter if we think their choices are right or wrong. I know this is hard to hear. But I had a similar lesson in this myself. Best bet is to pray for your friend and hope that she will see for her ownself how destructive doing coke is on her life as well as the life of her friends and family.
Good luck!
2006-10-04 07:50:12 · answer #3 · answered by Lyndee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yup sounds like she could use one (Buttkicking). Do some reading on the drug effects and tell her just what she is doing to her body. Over time and with much use . It causes heart problems. And she could die from this. She may tell you to mind your own business but tell her you are her friend and your friendship with her is your business. If the talk doesn't do any good and you are still concerned about it. Then you should go to a relative and tell them whats going on and they can get her the help she needs. She may hate you in the end. But I would rather for someone to hate me . Instead of hating thier selves and thier bodies enough to use drugs. Good Luck! And God Bless! Your a great friend.
2006-10-04 07:42:22 · answer #4 · answered by Nevada 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nicely whilst it consists of drugs maximum folk basically realize it whilst they hit all-time low there is not any reason she even prefer to attempt it interior the 1st place you are able to attempt to help her in case you will desire to communicate over together with her mom according to probability her mom can help her or get her into rehab or some thing, yet whilst she would not prefer your help no count how persistant you're then sorry to declare you lost and the b/f and the drug gained, if something my superb wager is to discover new pal that's not into that and that's alot smarter,
2016-10-15 12:37:57 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All crack heads need a good butt whoopin'. She is not going to tell you because then she would have to admit that she has a problem and drug addicts always justify why they do it even after treatment.
2006-10-04 07:44:15 · answer #6 · answered by rutchy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has to want help. My Ex didn't get help until he had a cocaine induced heart attack at 32.
2006-10-04 07:42:30 · answer #7 · answered by Fleur de Lis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok let em get thsi staraight she was honest with you about it when you asked her but she got pissed and told you to mind your own business and you said yes but that was actually a lie and you went and talked to her boyfriend.I can tell you one thing your not gonna get anywhere by lying to her
2006-10-04 07:42:17 · answer #8 · answered by greggypoo75 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
kick his and her butt then get them help. There are many good facilities out there, but she just has to want to stop befor she actually can.
2006-10-04 07:41:25 · answer #9 · answered by mhireangel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋