Yesterday, I finally sat down with my girlfriend and we had a serious conversation. I told her that I've been very disappointed lately because she hasn't been fulfilling my needs as far as sex go. Don't get me wrong, her sex is great every single time we do it; It's just that when the need for sex is there at particular times, she "plays me to the left". For example, I'll be sitting in bed butt naked giving her all the right hints that I'm horny as hell and my needs should be fulfilled. When I explained how I filled about the situation, her defense was that I pressure her to have sex most of the time. And my defense to that was no matter what the situation is, in a relationship, if we say we love each other, we should do things for each other unconditionally. And then I told her that there are a lot of ladies out in this world who are unfurtunate to have someone to make love to them, and here you are holding back sex from a person who loves you.
2006-10-04 07:20:21 · 5 answers · asked by Just_Asking 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This needs to go both ways. I have to say that seeing someone sitting on the bed butt naked waiting to be serviced is a bit of a turn off for me. Have you thought about giving her a hug, kiss and telling her how much you love her and want to make love to her? That might create a more positive outcome.
2006-10-04 07:25:33 · answer #1 · answered by Stef 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you came at her the wrong way. Your hints are also a little off.
If this is a relationship and you love her, you'll want her to be completly comfortable everytime she has sex with you, right? In this situation you don't want her to be mad at you and cut off the nooky so to diffuse future arguments use "I" statements, not "you". For example, the next time you bring it up say to her "Lately I've really wanted to make love to you, and it seems like we aren't on the same page. Is there something I'm doing wrong?"
It may seem hokey but she will immediatly be more willing to work with you, if she believes you want to do this for the BOTH of you. If she's feeling pressured ask her why she feels that way, since you love her. If she feels like your using her for the sex, try doing something other than having sex. If you go on a date, don't hint at it at all. BE gentlemanly and sweet, and make HER go after YOU.
Hope this helps, if you want anymore advice drop me a line.
2006-10-04 14:27:22 · answer #2 · answered by moderncutthroat 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why is she withholding sex? That's what you need to find out... I'm sure there are times when she's not in the mood, or tired.. I'm sure there are times when she has wanted it, and you don't want to... It happens... I understand where you're coming from, and agree w/ what you say, but you need to understand that she can't fullfill that need every single time you want to. Do you fullfill a specific need for her everytime? I think you two need to talk again...
2006-10-04 14:44:52 · answer #3 · answered by qbanita0113 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont pressure her then. Maybe she'd like to be seduced?? Also, the marriage thing...is there a future? You all need to work together on the emotional part of the relationship as well as the physical for it to be give and take.
2006-10-04 14:29:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
me has a female would like to tell you sometimes woman just aint in the mood.. that doesn't mean we don't like sex or don't love you.. it just means we aint in the mood..she may be the dominant type just wanted sex when she wants it and not the submissive type..but i myself i like to play both roles submisive and dominant.. so have fun with it and understand things..
2006-10-04 14:39:58 · answer #5 · answered by cottoncandie1969 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋