I stay home with our two girls, ages 3 and 6....the housework, homework, grocery shopping, cooking, etc. takes AT LEAST as much time and effort as your basic 9-5 job, right??
Am I the only one who thinks like this??
2006-10-04 07:12:16 · 22 answers · asked by Ms. GTO 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
To the person who said I don't appreciate how easy I have it, you couldn't be more wrong. I appreciate my fiance working so I don't have to, I just want HIM to realize that what I do is important as well.
2006-10-04 07:18:13 · update #1
No you are not the only one who thinks like that! Tell your fiance to trade you spots for a day and see what he thinks. Or better yet a week!
2006-10-04 07:14:33 · answer #1 · answered by panda 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't NEED to convince him anything. You love him enough to appreciate his efforts to provide for the family, he ought to love you enough to appreciate your efforts to maintain the household. The kids belong to the both of you; a family is team work.
This nonsense about who does what and who does more can really destroy a family unit down the road. It will become a power struggle between the two of you, with the kids caught in the middle. If he already has this type of mindset, then I'd seriously reconsider the relationship.
Of course, you CAN try all those advice from other answerers such as swapping places, and letting him do his own laundry and cook his own meal, etc., because I think they're all great suggestions. Hopefully, one of these methods will shine a light on your fiance regarding his biased attitude. But you know, some guys just might never get it.
Hope things will get better for you.
2006-10-04 14:48:45 · answer #2 · answered by ♫ Jemmy~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wrong 9-5 job doesn't have anything on a stay at home parent. I'm a stay at home mom and my work is never done! You shouldn't have to convince him he should support the hard work you do anyways. Stop washing his clothes, don't cook him dinner, don't pick up after him, or clean the rest of the house then when he has no clean underwear to put on in the mornings he'll realize how much you really do around there. My husband learned a long time a go and to this day he knows better than to say he works harder than me!
2006-10-04 14:18:14 · answer #3 · answered by Curious J. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being a mom is a 24/7 job and yes it is as hard as any other job and sometimes even harder. Some people may think just because a mom stays home with the kids it isn't tough at all. But if you think about it you have to cook, clean, take care of them when they are sick, listen to arguing, etc!! Big list of things that we have to do for our children. It's like men don't know how exhausting labor is either! Labor is more exhausting than a 16 hour shift at any job! But you just hang in there and be the good mom you are
2006-10-08 12:46:34 · answer #4 · answered by single_mom2106 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've always been a firm believe that homemakers have one of the hardest, most demanding, and most underappreciated jobs out there.
Interestingly enough, I think that last time I checked, the estimated salary for what housewives (stay-at-home mom's) should earn if they were paid salaries like everybody else, was around $140,000.
I'd point these facts out to him:
1) You don't get paid anywhere NEAR as much as what you should be getting for all of the things that you do
2) Your job doesn't go from 9 - 5; it's pretty much a 24 hour job.
3) You don't get "time and a half" for overtime, and you have LOTS of overtime to do.
4) No pension or 401 (k)
5) No vacation days, sick days, or holidays.
6) You have to have a variety of skill sets: housekeeper, chauffer, mediator, cook, psychologist, financial analyst, etc.
The website below is a GREAT eye-opener for those people with the unfounded stereotype that all stay-at-home moms do is lounge on the couch and watch soap operas all day. Check it out....
2006-10-04 14:21:41 · answer #5 · answered by Lexie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was fortunate enough to be a stay at home mom for 18 months with my son, and then I got divorced and had to go back to work. I loved to be at home, but it's definately alot harder than going to work everyday. I can't remember what the website was, but it did a calculation of all the things a mother does, and then gave an income value for those services we provide our children and men. The total estimated income was over $100,000/year! We are maids, cooks, nannies, etc. Maybe your man should realize that just because you don't make money, your job is much more difficult. It's the most important thing you can do for those children. I only wish I could be at home with my son. It's worth the work. Good luck! Hope he comes around soon.
2006-10-04 14:45:23 · answer #6 · answered by Caelan's mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ha. Only if it were that easy. I work 8-9 hours a day, drive 1 hour each way to work and home. I come home and have to do everything that you have ALL DAY to do in just a few hours in the evening. I think it's harder for a working mom to drive to and from work, work 8-9 hours a day, come home, cook, clean up after dinner, spend time with the kids, while doing laundry, vaccuuming, cleaning. Then the weekends are spend "CLEANING" thoroughly (Scrubbing floors, dusting..more laundry..etc). Go work full time and see which is harder.
2006-10-04 14:16:38 · answer #7 · answered by jevic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's true, and actually it's important to let him know that your job NEVER ends. He get's to leave his job, but you are at home or with the children 24 hours a day. You have to continue to cook, wash, and tuck them in bed. I am an at home mom of 3, and it is a lot of work. You are a doctor, a lawyer, a personal chef, a maid, a counselor, a wife, a secretary and one strong heck of a woman. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise!!
2006-10-04 14:15:06 · answer #8 · answered by mama 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You may not like the answer, but the answer I'm going to give is "It Depends".
I don't think being a housewife/homemaker/mom can be compared to having a job outside the home. Sure being a housewife is a 24/7 job, but at the same time - the breadwinner has to answer to customers, bosses, and shareholders.
Therefore I don't think its an apples to apples comparision.
In a nutshell, I don't think like that - but the efforts you do make should be appreciated.
2006-10-05 17:24:59 · answer #9 · answered by L.A. Scene 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do my 9 to 5 job and often take care of the kids inbetween before and after. Much easier to sit around playing with the kids and going shopping, and cooking while watching TV. I took my child to home depo, a breeze, he just points at everything. If I could be a stay at home father I would do it. You have it so easy, you don't appreciate it.
2006-10-04 14:15:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Point out that your work is 24/7. If he still gives you grief... tell him to try it himself and go to your mothers or a friends house for a weekend and let him experience what you do all the time. Leave a list of chores i.e. wash dishes and clothing, go shopping (with the kids), vacuum.... stuff you normally do. When the weekend is over, ask him if he sees the light. If he does, take the kids to your mothers, or his, and have a weekend getaway and reward him with lots of romance. If he still doesn't get it- let the house go to pot and tell him to clean it up himself when he complains.
Have a great day!!!
2006-10-04 14:18:09 · answer #11 · answered by Coo coo achoo 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋