He left yesterday and I'm a mess over it. It's not like I'm never going to see him again, he comes back for christmas break and then he goes away again to South carolina for AIT. I just want to know if anyone else is going through this and how do you deal with it??
2006-10-04 05:29:57 · 9 answers · asked by fidgety_kitty 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
I go through this all the time. My husband gets deployed all over the place and all the time. You never really get used to it either.
As for how I deal with it, I usually try to start a new hobby right after he leaves, and my goal is to have something made by the time he gets home (like crocheting a blanket or scarf, or painting a picture to hang on the walls, something) I also take and mark each day off on a caneldar before I go to bed when he is supposed to be home.
Another thing that helps is write to him every day. One of the best things for someone in Basic Training is getting mail. It helps them know that someone is thinking about them, and it helps them make it hrough as well. Pictures help too. Lots and lots of pictures. Not just of you, but of things and people that he is close to. Like a pet, friends and family. (no nude pics though, they will confiscate those). Save the care packages of home baked snacks and things until he is in South Carolina. They will confiscate those as well. But letters and pictures will not only help you but they will help him as well.
Take care, and don't stress. You will be fine, and if you need someone to talk to to help you get through this, feel free to IM me or e-mail. I have been through it, and I will go through it again.
2006-10-04 06:18:02 · answer #1 · answered by Genny 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This really is the easy part. And you know he'll be home for the holiday. That's so important. I've missed so many "special" days with my hubby in 18 years that I can't count them all. Just be satisfied in knowing that he's as safe as he can be right now. Then, he'll come home and still have to go to school. There really is comfort anytime you know they're safe and will be.
It gets easier, but I don't think you ever get used to it. The important thing is to stay busy and rely on the people closest to you whether it's family or friends. Find a hobby, work, volunteer or do other things you enjoy. You really can't change your life because he's gone. He wouldn't want you to either. Oh, there's times he'll get upset, but he'll also understand. He may even get distant at times. Don't take it personally. They go through alot of stress whether it's in school or on duty. Write letters to him often and keep them upbeat. Don't make them too long though. Sometimes, especially in BCT and AIT, they have studying to do or other stuff and they just don't have time. Prayers and church never hurt. There's great strength in that. Other than that, be faithful to him, love him, respect him and all that good stuff. Just stay busy and time will go faster and rely on those around you. If you marry him, you'll have other Army wives, the unit and military agencies that help as well.
Good luck!!
2006-10-04 07:59:50 · answer #2 · answered by HEartstrinGs 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband graduated from Parris Island last October. So at this time last year I was REALLY lonely without him. Right now he is overseas so I'm still lonely and more worried than ever. But what really helped me through boot camp was just writing him letters EVERYDAY that way he would know EVERYTHING that went on my day just as if he were here. I took a lot of pictures and sent them to him. Also, I started emailing some of his buddy's girlfriends and we kept each other up and gave each other support...it was really neat! I think that is one of the TOP things that helped me make it through, to share that with a girl that was going through the same thing at the same time. Plus when I didn't get news she'd let me know what he told her and the same way around. Just pray a lot for his safety, tell him how proud you are, write to him a lot, send him pictures of you and count down to the day you'll see him....what branch is he in? It doesn't sound like the Marines. Good luck!
Oh yeah and also, I worked on a gift that I gave to him on his graduation. I bought a Marines fabric and made him a blanket.
2006-10-04 05:48:33 · answer #3 · answered by laurel 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's been a few years, but yes I did go through being separated by military commitments. The key is to keep busy. Set some sort of health goal...like losing 10 pounds or getting buffed-up before you see him. Take on a big project related to when you start setting up house together after getting married...make a quilt, reupholster the sofa, refinish the dining room set...whatever. Find other girls whose guy has gone to basic or is deployed overseas. Do things together. I went on a trip with a girlfriend during that time. Keep your connections with him via email, telephone calls, etc. Consider sending him audiocassettes of you...keep a daily audio journal of your activities and send them to him. Have fun finding ways to send him little sexy gifts and pictures of you that will make him think of you.
All the best.
2006-10-04 05:43:41 · answer #4 · answered by kathy_is_a_nurse 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I went through it in the begining of the year... and I just want to say time heals all. It was only over time that I was able to get with it again... but none the less keep yourself occupied and keep your friends close.
2006-10-04 09:42:39 · answer #5 · answered by A_Soldiers_Wife 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im going through something similar. my hubby is as sea for 7 months and wont be home for christmas.count your blessings on that for now. once in and deployable they dont get to come home for christmas.. i cant give much advice on how to deal other than take it one day at a time. it will get better. stay busy, and dont dwell on it. all the advice i have been given. im here for you. my hubby left yesterday too
2006-10-04 05:34:05 · answer #6 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I went through that my fiance is in Iraq now.You just have to stay in touch as much as you can and reassure each other that you love each other and that you will wait for him.If you need to talk my email is baby_gurl310611989@yahoo.com.hang in there it will get easier.
2006-10-04 06:23:28 · answer #7 · answered by lori j 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep him in your daily prayers, because it's NOT about a "war on terror" or "fighting for freedoms". It's REALLY all about THIS!...
http://www.strayreality.com/Lanis_Strayreality/iraq.htm
2006-10-04 06:38:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get a date.
2006-10-04 05:32:36 · answer #9 · answered by Spirit Walker 5 · 0⤊ 8⤋